Question about Islam?

Question

I heard somewhere that...

A man can divorce his wife by saying i divorce you three times, is this true?

and also.. if he wants to remarry that same woman she must sleep with another man, is that true?

Any other information would be great.

cheers.

Answer 1

Islam is a very 'realistic' religion ... It knows that when two married-partners cannot live together, the best thing they can do is to seperate before tragedy strikes the family.

But, before one links his (or her) hand with the partner, one must be aware of her (or his) nature ... So, after linking hands and then breaking it up would surely make the Almighty unhappy ... This is because it was He who brought the couple together; it was He who desired the couple to sign a 'bond' which He did not desire to see it (the bond) shattered.

So, the first thing is that the couple should do is to make-up and resolve their differences ...

Even so, if there is still disharmony between the two, divorce is reccommended.

A man can divorce his wife by uttering "Talaq" three times; but not in one sitting - they have to be spread out upto three months!

Once the man divorces his wife, then she becomes a complete stranger to him (and he to her) ... However, if love still sparkles between the two and they desire to get married again, then each one of them have to get married again to a different partner ... Now they can divorce their partners; but have to wait for 40 days to get married again to each other (40 days is the minimum-time period because then the woman can come to know or realise whether she is pregnant or not by her second-husband.)

According to me, it is upto the woman or her second-husband to decide having s*x. Generally, this 'second-marriage' occurs within the family or relations ... So, the question of "sleep"ing with him should not arise - it is individuals choice that is decided before the second-marriage.

Answer 2

The Holy Qur'an and the hadith prescribe a set of steps which a seriously dissatisfied husband must follow.  Not to follow these steps is a serious sin.

1. First, the husband must tell the wife that he is seriously unhappy with her behavior.

(This is different from the little pinpricks of everyday life.)

2. If she doesn't change her ways, the next step is for him separate from her inside the house.  This means they sleep separately.

3. If she persists, he may strike her once, lightly, in manner that does not cause her pain or mark the skin.  (This step is not required; Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said, "The best among you do not beat.")

4. Next, he must call in representatives, ideally from each family, but they could also be knowledgeable people like sheikhs, to try to counsel the couple to a better relationship.  (One person represents the husband; the other represents the wife.)

5. Finally, if all this fails, the husband may divorce the wife during the time after her menses have finished and before they have had marital relations.

6. The husband and wife must continue to live under the same roof for three months.  During this time, she dresses normally as she always does with him.  They may eat together and do everything together, but must not touch.  At this time, he must pay her whatever remains of her dower (marriage gift.)

Under most circumstances, this situation will calm them down, and the husband will quickly decide to take back his wife.  If so, they can resume marital relations, but must bear in mind that they have been divorced once.

If the three months pass, and they have not reconciled, they are divorced and must separate.  However, they can remarry later.

7.  If they reconcile without separation and later, they have serious problems again, they may repeat steps 1-6.  However, if they have been through 1-6 twice, and the husband tells his wife she is divorced a third time, the divorce is permanent.  She must wear hijab with him.  She must stay in his house for three months, but then may leave.

(If she is pregnant, she must remain with him until she has recovered from the delivery.  If she is nursing, she may remain, at their discretion, for up to two years.)

If a prospective wife wants to have the right of private divorce by pronouncement, similar to the husband’s right explained above, she may stipulate that in the marriage contract.  A husband may also give his wife that right at any point during the marriage.

A wife may ask for a divorce in a court for one of two reasons:

1. for cause, such as non-fulfillment of the marriage contract or for cruelty.  In this case, the judge may order the husband to compensate the wife.

2. for no cause, or when a wife does not want to make the cause public.

In this case, she must refund her dower to her husband, if he insists.

Having said all that, I must stress that divorce, while halal, is the human action which Allah detests the most.  Shaytan has a huge celebration in h**l every time he manages to destroy a marriage.  Husbands and wives who fear Allah should try to please and comfort each other, and to be patient when things go wrong.

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If a divorced woman marries another man, and that marriage fails, she and the former ex-husband can remarry. This is only permitted if this marriage to someone else is a valid marriage, intended to last a lifetime, and is consummated.

Answer 3

she must be someone's wife. so marry be it.

thats another info you want.

not like what u want?

Answer 4

He can divorce his wife by saying "I divorce you". That's all that is required. If a person divorces his wife three times, then he cannot marry her again before she marries another man. Of course, that involves sexual relations with her new husband.

In Islamic law, the wife has to marry someone else before she can go back to her husband after being divorced three times. Islamic apologists will say that this is necessary to prevent frivolous divorce, but I consider it just another method for degrading women.

EDIT:

Slight correction to CILOVEU, both partners do not have to remarry first. It is only the woman who has to remarry. Also, It is only the man than can end the marriage by saying "I divorce you". A woman cannot do the same. If a woman wants to initiate divorce then she has to go through a lengthy process that usually ends up in her request being denied. That is why some Islamic countries have the concept of "kholea" where a woman can initiate divorce by giving up all rights to alimony and child support.

Also, the three month period you are talking about is not a limitation on the frequency of times a man can divorce his wife. In fact, a man can say "taladtik be el talata" and divorce his wife three times in one sitting.  There are some countries that prevent this "triple divorce", but many allow it in accordance with Islamic law.

EDIT:

Another correction to CILOVEU, the woman MUST have s*x in the second marriage. It is a requirement, if she does not go through with that the marriage is considered invalid (batel) and she cannot go back to her first husband. Please stop whitewashing your religion. State the facts as they are and let people judge for themselves.