Question about being harrassed in the military...?

Question

My wife is working on ADSW orders for the national guard. I am in college full time and was having a ruff time getting past my last few classes so my wife suggested that I should not work to finish up my degree (6 more months!) and then I can work while she goes to school.(We are 21 and 20) I thought is was a good idea, but her military supervisors and others where she works with goes out of the way to call her dumb for doing that and during team "meetings" they try an force there opinion on her and tells her she got married to soon and makes her feel very uncomfortable and sometimes cry. They also tell her to make sure not to get pregnant (we dont wont kids right now anyway), but some people make the remark that i must be on the "down low" aka g*y because we have not had kids yet. Is there anything my wife can do about this or anything I can do as a civilian for them implying that im g*y?

Thanks

Answer 1

dude getting upset about being called g*y is pretty g*y

Answer 2

She needs to report the conduct the installation EO officer.  She will need to take notes, keeping track on the date and times of the conversation.  Record it if at all possible.

Once she opens the EO complaint she may get mover to keep her out of a hostile environment.  She also has the right to request to be moved so she will not have to put up with possible retribution.

Should retribution occur, she will need to log that as well and report it.

Answer 3

Sweetheart i'm not really sure about how things work with the national guard since i'm a Marine.

I do not agree with the serious verbal hazing your wife has to endure. I suggest you both speak to a chaplain and get this out into the open. Maybe something can happen there.

Your wife shouldn't have to be harassed about her personal life by her fellow soldiers.

Good luck

Answer 4

Richie there has some good advice. Even with civilian employees there are some subjects that are really out of bounds. Unless a person's work is being affected by it and even then there are limits as to how far those conversations should go.  It sounds like someone is just being overly meddlesome and is crossing that line and she needs to take it up the chain so that they are aware of it and can reign someone in at the proper time.  

Answer 5

Tell your wife to go to her commanding officer with it, If the commanding officer is part of the problem, then tell her to go to his boss. If she doesn't get satisfaction from him. Then she needs to go to JAG! Heck she should probably do that anyway.

As for what they are telling her. It sounds like you have a cute wife and they are trying to get laid.

Answer 6

d**n, sorry to hear that!  Sounds to me that the National Guard is one big wallapalooza!  If I ever decide to become an ANG.  They'll be kicked in the teeth for them giving me their opinion.  I've been in the Marines for 10-years.  We have a program for newly weds but it isn't demeaning, it is there because of the high divorce rate.  Sounds like to me that they need a flame thrower to the place!  I'll be damned they act like that under my command!  We welcome people like you in our beloved Corps.  Plus, it isn't any of their d**n business.  That is what happens when a State militia thinks they are true grit as us!  Freaking civilians in uniform!  Request Mast, Request Mast all the way up to the f****s wannabe General if you need to!

Answer 7

Once you enter the Military you lose a few rights like the right to freedom of speech gone heck in the Marines you can get hit with a gun butt and do nothing about it  

Answer 8

The only thing you can do is suck it up and grow a set, get a tougher skin!

Answer 9

Your wife's unit should have an EO (Equal Opportunity) representative.  She should stop by his/her office and make a complaint.

The remakes being made to her uncalled for and not professional.  Surely not the behavior one would expect from someone wearing the uniform.  Furthermore, it's nobody's business WHEN she gets pregnant.  Your personal life has absolutely no bearing on the mission, unless your relationship should turn abusive, which it isn't.

In the event that her unit EO rep gives her the brush off, she should then move up the chain and address the problem with her 1SG or CO directly.  If they are the ones making the inappropriate comments, her next stop should be the post or base EO representative.

Answer 10

yes there is go to the IG

Answer 11

without a doubt.  Use the chain of command first.  if the people that are saying that stuff are in the chain of command go one step over their head. and then there is always the local JAG office.