Question about bridesmaids?

Question

Okay heres the deal:

I have this one cousin that I'm really close with, and always have been close with. She's 23, and I want to ask her to be one of my bridesmaids.

BUT

She has a little sister, who is 15, who I am not as close with since we didn't really grow up together and have never been that close.

Do I have to ask both of them to be my bridesmaids? Will it really hurt my younger cousin to not be a bridesmaid?

Answer 1

Usually bridemaids are between the ages of 18-30, so for me, a 15-year old really doesn't fit. To answer your question, you DO NOT have to ask both of them to be your bridemaids.

If it does hurt your younger cousin, give her something else to do in the wedding, usually something that won't require an addition to a budget. She could dress really pretty and ask people to sign your guest book or something. And if she is not hurt, then your problem is resolved.

Answer 2

No, just have the one cousin.  My cousin had my sister in her wedding and not me and I was fine with it.  Don't worry about hurting her feelings.  That isn't your problem.  You shouldn't feel pressured to have someone as a bridesmaid because you are afraid of hurting their feelings.  If she asks then just tell her that you feel a lot closer to her sister because you are closer in age or just tell her that you don't want a lot of bridesmaids.

Answer 3

No you don't have to ask her, besides she's 15...she'll get over it.

Answer 4

You don't need to ask both... especially since the younger is only 15. But you should have her be a part of your Wedding somehow... she can be in charge of the guest book, or light a candle during the ceremony... something so she feels involved.

Answer 5

No u do not have to ask both of them!

She is 15 and probably don't care at all.

This is your wedding not a family outing!

Answer 6

Only ask

the girls

whom have

been there for

you!

Answer 7

No, you do not have to ask both cousins to be your bridesmaids. The younger one might be a little disappointed, but she will get over it.

Answer 8

No, you don't have to ask her to be a bridesmaid, especially since you are not really close.  I'm sure she wouldn't expect it anyways.

Answer 9

No you don't have to ask them both and if the younger one is aware that you guys aren't as close as you are to her sister she probably won't care. If she demonstrates any resentment ask her to do something else, Ring bearer, flower girl, guestbook attendant, usher, whatever.

Answer 10

No, you don't need to ask her to be a bridesmaid but you could ask her to be at the guest book or some other position for the wedding day. Congrats and best wishes!

Answer 11

Can you have the younger sis do something else, like be in charge of gifts and the guestbook table? Have her stand near the enterance and when guests come, they can just give their coats/purses and card or gift so the guests don't have to worry about it.

Or you can have her seat people or be an assistant to you before the wedding, such as helping you get into your dress or carrying your train down the aisle (although at that point, you might as well make her a bridesmaid)

If you don't want her to do any of those things and would rather her just be a guest, there is nothing wrong with that. She will probably be jealous since she is your cousin and she is 15 (jealousy age) and she would probably love to be considered a bridesmaid. Who knows, maybe the reason you two aren't as close is because she has never been offered something like being a bridesmaid. I have cousins who I truly love but we are not as close as we should be and I would give anything to be closer to them. If one of them asked my sibling to be in their wedding because we aren't as close I would be deeply saddened.

Maybe this can be an opportunity for you two to be closer.  

Answer 12

You do not have to ask your younger cousin. If you were really close to her too, and you asked her sister, but not her, then I could understand how she could be upset. The people who stand up on the altar with you sharing that special moment should be people who are important to you, who mean something to you, not just people you asked for the sake of asking or in order to not hurt feelings. Ask those who you really want to be up there with you to be up there with you and you won't regret it. Congratulations and best of luck!

Answer 13

UH nope, bridesmaids are supposed to be ppl close to you, if you wanted to go out on a limb you could ask her to be a flower gilr if anything

Answer 14

No, you are not obligated to ask the younger sister.  She is too young to be a bridesmaid but if you are feeling bad you could always ask her to be a Jr. bridesmaid.  If you are not close to her then she is probably not close to you, I am guessing, so She probably will not be hurt by your decision.

Answer 15

Yes, by all means have her as a bride's maid also.  Do you have a Maid of honor (unmarried woman) yet?  If not the cousin that you are close to can be your Maid of Honor.Matron of Honor is a married woman.  You can have a Maid of Honor and a Matron of Honor and as many brides maids as you like to have.  I would suggest a even number of bride's Maids 2,4,or 8. No more than eight.

Answer 16

No, you don't have to ask the little sister and I highly doubt it will hurt her feelings.  

Answer 17

no you don't have to ask both...but you probably could find something trivial for her to do...hand out programs or bubbles...bells what ever...that way she isn't hurt.

Answer 18

Just ask the one you want. It's not going to cause a problem particularly since she is so much younger.

We encountered this with our groomsmen - had two brothers out of three nephews. Don't worry, they understand.