Question about herpes.. again, but added more. ?

Question

When I was younger, I used to get cold sores (probably once a year since I was 10ish). I stopped getting them once I hit 13 and haven't had one since. Well, a week ago, I gave my boyfriend oral s*x *unprotected*. Four days ago, I gave him a hand job and let him come in my mouth (so his p***s touched my mouth obviously). 2 days after I gave him a hand job, I got a tingly feeling in the corner of my lip and knew that I was getting a cold sore. It never fully broke out, but I got the tingly feeling for a day. Well, today, my boyfriend tells me that he has a cold sore on the corner of his lip. He has never had a cold sore before, so I know it has to be from me, especially since I still kissed him when I felt the tingly-ness going on. (Stupid I know). Is there a high chance that he got genital herpes when I gave him a bj a week before I had the tingles? What about when his p***s was in my mouth for seconds 2 days before the tingles? I am scared to death! I love him with all of my heart and feel ashamed for giving him HSV I already, and would feel even worse if he got HSV 1 in his genitals because of me. I've spent all of today bawling my eyes out, thinking and fearing the worse. If someone comes in contact with herpes, do they automatically get it? Or is there like a percentage that get it? Also, if it took him only 2 days to develop a cold sore, if he had genital herpes, wouldnt it show up soon? I know that some people with genital herpes never show symptoms, but still. Oh, and I heard that if you are diagnosed with HSV I on your mouth, then there is a slim chance that you can get HSV I on your genitals. Is this true? Is there a test that we can take to see what kind of herpes we have? I don't want to take a blood test because mine will come up positive b/c of my oral herpes, but wont tell me if I have it in the genitals. Is there a test that specifically tests to see if herpes is in the genitals? I'm sorry for all of the questions, but I am a wreck! I am going to the gyn on Thursday (to get every STD test but HERPES!! Go figure), so I will ask him too. But, I just want to hear some of your answers. Thanks! :)

That was my message last night.

But today, I woke up and have a big red patch on the roof of my mouth. It doesn't really hurt, it just feels sore. I have never had anything like this before. I am getting sick (or getting over it pretty much), which is probably why I got a cold sore to begin with. I had a sore throat, runny and congested nose, and I have post nasal drip (gross I know) lol Could the red patch be due to the post nasal drip? I'm getting better, and my throat doesn't hurt as bad anymore, but I still have the post nasal drip. And now I feel like I'm stressing out! AHHHH Good thing I see my doctor tomorrow. I'm gonna have him look at the patch in my mouth.

My boyfriends cold sore is gone today too.

Answer 1

HSV-2 on the lips is very rare. More than likely y ou have HSV-1 on your lips just like the rest of the 80% population (I AM ONE OF THEM). If he got a cold sore on his lips, it could of been dormant and he may of gotten them from his aunt or mom or dad.. he probably doesn't remember.. just like you probably barely remember you last had one! So don't freak out.. 80% of the population carries the virus and even celebrities.. (go figure their people too, you can search on google who has it)

ANyhow, if he has cold sores type 1 on his lips, and more than likely you got them too.. there is no way he can get it on his genitals b/c you BOTH HAVE THE SAME TYPE VIRUS and CANNOT INFECT EACH OTHER ANYWHERE WHEN YOU HAVE THE SAME VIRUS B/C YOU BOTH HAVE THE VIRUS ALREADY BUILT UP IN YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM) Now if you had HSV-2 on  your lips which is very very very rare, him having type 1 on his lips, his body is immune to the virus, so they're may be a little bit of protection against hsv-2 on his genitals if u had hsv-2 on  yoru lips.. BUT THATS VERY VERY VERY VERY RARE..  

Answer 2

Even if you are exposed to the virus in two places, you might not develop it in both.

For example, my boyfriend gave me genital hsv-1 from his cold sore infection.

The night he infected me (he had no symptoms) he kissed me a lot and gave me oral s*x. And yet I only developed symptoms genitally.

Some people do catch it in both places at once, but yet more just catch it in one, even if exposed in multiple locations. Herpes doesn't just need to make contact with the skin, it needs to find a way in. Obviously my skin on my genitals was more vulnerable at the time.

It is true that once you have had that particular herpes virus in one place for a few months - say on the mouth - you are unlikely to get the same virus genitally. That is because you start to produce antibodies to defed you against that virus.

As for your boyfriend's cold sore, well normally when you first catch hsv-1 having never had a herpes virus before you would be quite ill and have quite a bad outbreak - possibly with other symptoms such as sore throat and swollen neck glands and a fever, because it is a virus.

If he has only had a very mild outbreak, it could be that he had cold sores before you came along. Remember that 60% of kids have oral herpes by the time they go to high school. So even if he tests positive for herpes in a few months time, it could just mean he has had it since he was a child.

With 80% of adults having oral herpes, they don't usually test you for it, though you can have a blood test. That only tells you you have the virus, it does not tell you whether you have it genitally.

If he only has symptoms on his mouth, I'd be inclined to assume his genitals are fine.

Answer 3

Everything is possible...  If you both have cold sores, it's possible that you both have HSV1, but that doesn't mean that you gave it to him.  You said it yourself:  Some people never show symptoms.  He might have had it before and not know it.

There is even the possibility of him passing a different strain of the virus to you, and that's what gave you a painful cold sore this time.  But I am not suggesting anything.

Don't feel too bad.  You told him the truth about your cold sores before you even kissed.  Nobody does that, so, you did a nice thing.

For now use some home remedies so that the cold sores go away quickly, and wait to see if he gets anything in his privates before you decide to see a doctor.  But even if he does, the doctor might (or not) preach at you about a virus that 80% of Americans have.  So, please don't feel too bad.  Stop your bawling and blaming yourself for anything.  You did the right thing by informing him, and if he develops an infection, it might or it might not have come from you.