Question for adoptees-what would you want to know?

Question

If you could ask your birthparents-mom or dad, 10 questions-What would they be?

Answer 1

I'm in reunion, so can ask easy questions e.g. medical history, brothers & sisters etc, but there are other questions that I have difficulty asking.

1. Why did you give me up?

2. Did you consider aborting me? Why didn't you abort me?

3. Why didn't you tell your parents about me?

4. Why did you take away my heritage (she went to another country to have me, so I don't even have the same nationality)?

5. Why didn't you want me to grow up with the same religion as you? (I'm atheist anyway, but I feel even more on the outside because I don't know anything about their religion. Its difficult to explain)

6. What did my bio dad want (the papers say he was supportive, but other stuff in there has been wrong)?

7. Did you listen to his opinion or was it just you?

8. Did you ever consider keeping me?

9. Do you regret giving me up?

10. Why did you give me up? (I've listed this twice, because I really really don't understand why she gave me up)

And bonus questions:

Why didn't you name me?

What happened in the hospital? Did you hold me? Is it true that you didn't want to see me for the first few days?

Do you love me?

Why did you give me up?

Answer 2

I wouldn't ask them anything. I don't care. I don't even know them, and they don't know me. They're strangers.

WHY WOULD YOU PEOPLE CARE?

THEY GAVE YOU UP AND THEY AREN'T YOUR PARENTS.

Maybe they had a good reason, maybe not.

It doesn't matter.

Be grateful for the parents that adopted you and made you a part of their family!

Answer 3

I'm in Australia - so can obtain my identifying info - so my questions would start after I knew who they were. (unlike so many in the USA who can't even obtain a small amount of info because on the insaneness that is 'sealed records'.

1. why was I given up for adoption?

2. why couldn't you find a way to keep me?

3. do I have siblings?

4. can I have photos?

5. what is my heritage / family history?

6. can I meet you both & other relatives?

7. are there any family medical conditions I need to know about?

8. have you always thought about me & missed me?

9. does the family know about me - or am I some hidden secret?

10. can we get to know each other now?

.......off the top of my head.

(some of these I have finally found out - after 38 yrs - some I am still waiting to know the answers)

Answer 4

1.  Why was I put up for adoption

2.  Did you name me

3. Where was I born

4. Did you hold me when I was born

5. Did you put me in the yellow onesie,  I still have it

6. Who is my father

7. What is the family medical history

8. Can you tell me family traits likes/dislikes looks and features

9. Do I have brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins . . . .

10. Did you think about me over the years

Answer 5

My situation is a little different, in that my mother didn't give me up willingly, and my parents got married 6 months after I was born.

So I asked her some different questions, such as:

How did you and dad meet?

Where did my green eyes come from, anyway? (She has brown and he has blue)

Where did you live when you had me?

Did you REALLY have to stop a parade to get through to the hospital when you had me?? (as is the story, lol)

Was I a twin? (I was only 4 lbs at birth)

Why didn't you just grab me and run away?

Answer 6

I would ask my father:

1. What were my grandparents like?

2. When you found out that my mom was pregnant, what was your response?

3. Why did you chose to not be apart of my life?

4. Did you know that I have a great dad, and he has been my greatest support?  How does that make you feel?

5. Do my brother's and sisters know about me?

6. Does your family know about me?

7. Why did you love my mom?

8. What does it feel like to know you have a child out there, but not know anything about her?

9. Do you go to church, what are your beliefs?

10. What are your characteristics, favorite foods?

Answer 7

1-  I would ask her/him why they chose to place me for adoption- and then thank them for choosing life for me

2-  I would ask them if I had any siblings

3-  I would ask questions about health issues

4-  I would ask if there was anything that I could do to repay my birth mother's sacrificing herself instead of me, to abortion

Answer 8

1.What is my heritage?

2. Any siblings?

3. Medical issues?

4. Why did you give me up?

5. Did you love my father?

6. Have you thought about me?

7. What are your interests? What do you like to do?

8 Have you tried to find me?

9 Do you regret your decision?

10.Do you wonder how I feel about you/adoption?

Answer 9

1.) Why did you leave me?

2.) Who is my father?

3.) Why won't tell anyone about me?

4.) Do you regret leaving me?

5.) Do you regret rejecting me?

6.) Won't you please write me again?

7.) Why am I so easy to ignore?

8.) How can you consider yourself a mother to your kept children, when you don't consider your first born to be your daughter?

9.) How can you sleep at night?

10.) Won't you please give me another chance?

Answer 10

Do I have any living relatives?

What health problems run in the family?

Any kind of family history would be useful.

And I'd want to say Thanks.