Question for all ARMY guys and gals out there?

Question

I have been with my bf for a year and a half now. We're both 21 and i guess we're pretty serious about each other. He's signing up for the army and he's going to be gone for 4 years. Has anyone of you had a relationship with someone outside the military and did it work out?? I heard that soldiers party a LOT and have a tendency to cheat. I love my boyfriend and i know he loves me. When I told him part of how i feel when he goes (we havent completely talked about it), he even says that he KNOWS that he will still be in love with me. He said that just one look at me and he will fall back in love with me over and over again. This is really hard. Im also going to school and will be done in 2 years. I just dont know what to do or whats going to happen. What are ways to communicate and ways to make the relationship better? What do you think the chances are of our relationship surviving??

Answer 1

All military men cheat after all one is gone for "four" years "and" yes they party alot. It's a way of life. You will have many people say "No they don't" but I did 6 years active and I've seen it all. Of course he loves you but when one is 10,000 miles away and a pretty lady says "Let's party" then the party is on.  

Answer 2

4 years? what is he going into?  my brother was gone for the length of basic training then another couple months of specialized training and that was it. i also knew a guy who went for the length of basic, got some leave, then went back for training but it would only take a year and a half they said....4 years seems like a lot, and he will probably have some leave time in there if it really is gonna be that long...

  idk, if you guys really love each other it could work out.  i know some couples that made it, others who didnt.  it all depends on you guys really

ohh, his CONTRACT is for four years.  yah, dont worry, youll see him.  four years just means that in anytime in those four years if they need him they can snatch him.  doesnt mean he will be gone gone for those four years.

Answer 3

I am in the army and I know a lot of soldiers who do not cheat on their girls. It more of a personal decision than a prerequisite. Army guys don't party any more than regular people do. We are just known for doing it is all. I mean, I have a girlfriend who has 2 kids. I met her when I came back from Afghanistan and we have been together for a year. I have never cheated on her and we are having a great relationship. If you want to make sure it can last go with him. Enroll in school where ever he goes. Make it work and have him get seperates (seperats) so you guys can afford a place to live off post.

Just get married or something

Answer 4

You both are still young things change with age. I hope the best for you two but if it does not work out it was not meant to be.

Vet-USAF

Answer 5

He won't be gone for 4 years.... he'll be AD there's a HUGE difference. Gone is when he's in basic, or at AIT. If you are serious and truly love him then you can do it, make the decisions now to be together. School can be done online, at a school near him, etc there's always options.  Write, email, text, call on the phone, get a webcam, etc to stay in communication.   Decide whether this relationship is worth it, if it's not then move on, if it is then make every effort to make it work; and YES it's really that simple of a decision, the making it work part is the hard part.

Answer 6

Im speaking in the view point of a guy that is going to be shipped for bct this sept... i myself am going to stick with my gf and get married next year. I always have this feeling "at home" with my gf that i would never find in other girls.. and im sure ur bf have that also. There will always be one and only one true and faithful love in a mans heart that he will hold despite 10,000 s**y girls infront of him. Alas... only time can tell. But pray, have faith with each other and never cheat in ur side and his side and all will be well my dear :)

Answer 7

I serve Active Duty in the US Air Force and my boyfriend serves Active Duty in the US Army. Soooo we see each other for about a month per year. lol.

Some service members cheat, but a lot are faithful.  You just don't hear about the faithful ones because it's not good gossip material.

To strengthen your relationship, I strongly advise you talk to him about this concern.  He's thinking very similar things, I guarantee you, because military wives and girlfriends (and boyfriends and husbands, for that matter) have an even worse reputation than military men (and women).  Talking about the fact that you're nervous about the future will bring you two closer.

While he's in Basic Combat Training, write him a letter every day telling him what you did and that you're thinking of him.  He'll be SO grateful for them when he receives them.

Make a scrapbook or something to give him when he graduates BCT, too.

Keep yourself busy, too, so that you don't miss him - get a second job, start a new hobby, join a club.  Also do something that you can attach a goal to - for example, sometimes when we're both training, I'll set a goal of losing a certain amount of pounds or inches before the next time I see my Soldier.  It gives me something to look forward to on a weekly basis.

Answer 8

i been in the army 3 yrs married and never cheated even while she went back home for vacation or while i was in iraq...to be honest there was the opportunity there was a few women that wanted to you know what but i had to turn them away its a choice that he has to make...single guys that live in the barracks do party alot so hes gonna have lots of peer pressure and a little alcohol to influence him....make sure you keep in constant contact with him thats the most important thing...good luck!

Answer 9

My boyfriend just went to Ft Benning for Basic/Infantry Training. He'll be gone for 14 weeks, then get to come home for like 10 days and then he'll be stationed to his first duty station. It's hard, no lie. Mine has only been gone for 2 weeks and it seems like forever already. But you have to keep yourself busy, work, school, going out with friends, ect. I hear some relationships last, all depends if you guys make it work. And I hear some don't last, the distance and not being able to see or talk to your love one whenever , some people can't do. Some Army guys do party a lot and would rather be single and have that kind of life. Other guys grow up during Basic and relize they want to be with their girl and no one else. Plus if you do get married, they get paid more, and there's benefits and so on, so it's not a bad thing. Before my boyfriend left, we didn't talk about marriage at all. All we talk about, is that we would stay together and make it work. Now like I said, he has only been gone for 2 weeks and has already written me sayin he wants to get married =) Just remember to focus on your career and let him focus on his, those are two most important things, support one another. If you two really love each other, you will make it work. It will be hard and a long road to take, but worth it =) Have any questions, feel free to e-mail me