Question:

Question for homeschooled kids!?

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Do you feel that homeschooling has ...

(a) Interfered with your social development/made it hard to make friends

(b) Had no effect on your social development/ability to make friends

(c) Improved your social development/made it easier to make friends

I'm interested! What's your experience with the social side of homeschooling?

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19 ANSWERS


  1. I've actually been home-schooled and gone to public school. While I was home-schooled I didn't have that many friends, only friends from church and my soccer team. When I went to public school I had more friends, but all my close friends were from church anyway. I think that it actually made it easier to talk to people after home school, just because I wasn't afraid of what people thought. Thanks for asking this question.


  2. I would have to say B. i decided to be home schooled several years ago and although my friends from public school have since faded away into almost non existence to me, i make friends with people i work with very easily. as long as you aren't secluded from life outside of home it shouldn't be a problem.

  3. I asked my kids and they all say b-c.    They spend so much time with friends because they have no homework, they are done school within a few hours a day that there is no impediment in their "social lives".

  4. Here's a post from Primary and Secondary schooling:

    I am 15 and a junior in high school...i went to a private school until 8th grade then went to a public school in a different town for 9th grade. i only knew one person at my new school... i still don't really have many friends here. I was popular at my old school but now I just can't relate to the people here..the popular people smoke pot on the weekends and go to parties and drink and stuff but I can't relate to that. I get good grades-my sophomore year i got a 4.17 gpa and this year i am taking 2 honors and 2 AP classes and i play basketball..I am attempting for a 4.8 GPA. but the whole social aspect of school gets me down. im introverted and my friend said she thought I was a "snob" when she first met me in 9th grade..we're ok friends now but she kinda ditched me.anyways is this something to worry about?people at my school still dont know me last week a girl said "are you new i never seen you before"..... anyways im sad all the time about my lack of friends

    So much for Brick Schools making Socialization easy.

    I'm going to be cutting and pasting as many of these as I can find for the naysayers.

    And remember the social outcasts are the ones generally doing all the shooting on campuses!

  5. Well, this is my second year in homeschooling, and it's been a lot easier on me. My grades have went from F's to A's, and I haven't been sick for an entire year (probably on account of getting the required amount of sleep).

    Now I'm not going to lie, at first, it's a little difficult to get used to the fact that you won't see everyone through the day. You have to make a little more effort to stay in contact with some of your friends. But after a while, it gets pretty easy. Now I hang out with my friends just as much out of school as the ones in school.

    Not everyone's the same, but it's definitely been a good choice for me. (:

  6. B-C.

    Look, people have to realize by now how ignorant it is to "wonder" about homeschooler's social lives.  Homeschoolers have a HUGE social advantage over public school kids.  Where did people get the idea that spending a FORCED  8 hours a day, 5 days a week, 10 months a year with kids only their own age is socializing?  Is being around kids your own age, no wiser or more mature, going to build character and skills?  

    check it out..

    http://www.familyeducation.com/article/0...

  7. i have to say its in between a and b, i was homeschooled for 1 year and it did interfere with my social dvelopment but once i returned to regular school i kept my ability to make new friends.

  8. C.

    I don't waste 8 hrs. a day at school, so I have more time for friends. It's also alot easier to make friends when people don't know anything about you. Alot of times in public school someone has heard something about so and so and blah blah blah...

    They don't have some preconceived idea of who I am, so they want to get to know me.

    And I actually *know* how to socialize. People think because homeschoolers are not in a class with 30 other kids each day that we are not socialized. Just because someone is put in a classroom with 30 kids each day doesn't mean they are socialized.

    And I'm not sure why public school would even be considered "socialization". Kids are bullied, rumors are spread, kids are left out if they don't have the coolest clothes--what kind of socialization is that?

    Homeschoolers not only learn how to socialize properly, but they learn how to socialize with kids their own age as well as adults.

    Many of the homeschooled kids I've seen are actually *more* social than the kids I've seen who go to public school.

    People think homeschoolers aren't social and public schooled kids are--I'd say it's the other way around.

  9. As a parent, We homeschooled all 3 of our kids for many years, then let them finish in public school.. Our oldest says that it did affect his socilal abilities ( but you should know that we did take them each week to get togethers at skating rinks etc with large groups of other home schooled kids)  My middle son says it had no effect on him and my youngest, my daughter is now almost 17 and in public shool in the 11th grade. She is outgoing and vivacious and if asked, she says it did not have any effect on her at all. But again, we did have weekly get togethers and planned activities with other home schooled kids in our area.

  10. I have been homeschooled since 8th grade (currently 11th grade) and I feel that my social  development has remained consistent.  I go to a co-op once a week and take 4 classes, then recieving my homework for the week.  So I do see my friends once a week, and I see half of my friends on Saturday for a physics class I take.  We do have socials and dances just like any other school.  Come to think of it I have the same if not more friends from homeschooling.  I know alot of people in public schools who I have met from Church or through my friends home schooled.

  11. For me it would be B. I have a ton of friends, all of them Christians( I am also a Christian), and they are really cool. I hang out with them all the time, and we have a home schooled basketball team that competes against other home schooled kids. I love being home schooled!! I defiantly think I am smarter than I would be in public school, and that I learn more being home schooled. I am a freshman and I am doing some sophomore work. So anyhow, I hate when people ask me if I have friends and stuff. DUH, I have friends! Being home schooled does not mean that you are home all the time doing nothing and have no social life!!! I even have friends who go to public school. So yes, homeschooling rocks!!

    Hope this answered your question!!

  12. I'd have to say "c"...because I've been homeschooled, i haven't been caught up in all the drama in school. At my first job, people noticed how I was friendly, and was about the only person there who got along with everbody.

    :)

  13. C, definitely.

    There are still bullies, jerks, and teasing but for some reason -I assume improved confidence- I've noticed that homeschooled kids have a tendency to be more peaceful.

    If you're homeschooled and don't have any friends, there are two possible reasons:

    1) It is simply not possible for you to make other friends. There are no other homeschoolers in the area, and/or you're being slave-driven.

    Or,

    2) It's possible for you to make friends, you just haven't made the effort.

    2 is usually the case and is especially common among kids who have just transferred out of the system. I see it a lot. From my experience, homeschooled kids are given a lot of independence in ways that school kids aren't. In school, you're put in your building with your assigned group and your assigned work and everyone's always on your case about doing it. When school kids first leave that environment, they understandably don't know what to do. If you've never had to take the initiative to go meet people, it can be a little tough.

    If you're homeschooled and you feel like you don't have any friends, join the Scouts. Go to a class for teenagers, on something you're already good at. Skateboard where everyone else skateboards. All you have to do is put yourself out there and the human social instinct will do the rest.

    Realistic expectations are also required. In high school, people walk around with a big entourage, but most people only have one or two good friends in their lives. I'm privileged enough to have a tight group of four after strengthening that bond for several years.

    If you live in rural Kansas and are homeschooled, it's astronimcally unlikely that you're getting well-served socially. Beyond that, it's not hard.

    Also, many kids will say, "I'm being homeschooled for three weeks," and then hate it. Well, if you're temporarily out of school, that doesn't count as being homeschooled. Just like going to one class at a school a few times doesn't count as being a student at that school.

  14. The only people I've ever known, either in person or encountered online somehow, who felt that homeschooling had negatively affected them socially were kids who DIDN'T GET OUT OF THE HOUSE.

    I knew one girl who ended up going to school as of gr. 8 because her mom worked all day and the girl was an only child with a single mom, so she was stuck at home all the time. She didn't have nearly enough social contact and homeschooling DID negatively affect the social shyness she already had. Those who post now and then in here who complain essentially seem to be saying the same thing: they were stuck at home all the time or very rarely got out. Which doesn't make sense to me--you've got a TON of time while homeschooling to do things with other people!

    ADDED: The person below me is a prime example of what I was talking about. "No chance of making friends." Well, that's just stupid. My kids have made friends and have always been homeschooled. The homeschooled kids they know have other friends than just them, too. Why? Because these kids DO STUFF OUTSIDE THE HOUSE. It's a choice--you can stay shut up (or have your kids stay shut up) in the house or you can get out there and do stuff.

    I will add that 99% of the time the complainers were former public school students who had been acclimated to being constantly surrounded by other people the same age.

  15. I just started college.  I was in homeschooling all through my high school years.  My homeschooling never interfered with my social life.  When I was in public school, I never really like the school activities, proms, etc.,  Homeschooling helped me alot with my studys.  I've learn alot and took my time that I got A's instead of B's and C's like I did in school because of distractions and teachers not having time to help.  I had different experience then others.  Some homeschoolers were all about learning and doing chores on breaks.  I watched my soap operas on breaks and my music.  I also had a friend that also was homeschooled.  We would call each other when we were on our breaks and talking about getting together.  We also didn't have school on a day because we rather have time off from our work to go to the pool or have to go important functions.  To this day, I still keep in touch with my friends that I made in school and still hang out with them.  You still see them, but you just don't see them everyday.  The best thing is not getting up so early and working in your PJ's.  I could go on and on about how homeschooling was great for me, but it might take up so much room.

  16. some people think we don't get out at all but we really do. I have trouble making friends but thats just who i am it has more to do with the person rather then wether their homeschooled or not I know how to interact with kids younger then me and how to interact with my family better then some kids who go to school because im with them 24/7 (give or take a few hours) I do dance and go to church so i do have the ability to make friends and im not living the sheltered life like some think and i don't dress strange i dress like normal people. hope this answers your questions.

  17. im 13 yrs old and a homeschooler i really think its A

    it was and is hard to make friends unlike school you meet hundreds of kids but homeschoolers have no chance of having friends

  18. Although my son is only 6 and homeschooled in the 1st grade.  He has a very outgoing personality, and doesn't have the stigma of being in certain social classes or have to worry about being bullied.  My son loves to make friends, and he did go to preschool for 2 years in those years he picked up some really bad habits of talking back which he never done before then.  I think a child's personality has a lot to do with how they interact with others.

  19. I will quote you my daughter who wonders why this is such an issue for everyone but home schooled young people.

    She asks why is everyone outside the home school community so concerned about our social lives?

    Our children have so much interaction with other people on a daily basis that we have to stay focused on home schooling; the book work part of it; otherwise school would be something nice to do between activities.

    They would also like you to know that they feel that it is schools that limit social circles to just specific age groups, and they feel that interferes with learning to socialize with people off all ages, and back grounds much more than home schooling would ever limit a child.

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