Question for married people ?

Question

i have a silly question for the married people out there... let me briefly explain first.. i have just recently married the person i have been in love with for about ten years..(since i was 13 when we first dated..) i am now 23. our relationship was off and on since then. then we went separate ways.. did our thing.. then found each other again and got married. :) i love him so much and he is great! great with my kids too.. my question.. why do i feel so sad.. or depressed.. when he goes out with his friends with out me.. I DONT wanna be with him 24/7 ... really i dont. but when i am not with him i miss him and want him to come home! is this normal when ur married..?? or when ur with the person u love? or am i just a weirdo...?

Answer 1

you're not a weirdo...you're human.

it could be jealousy or worry over what is going on because you aren't there to see it with your own two eyes.

Answer 2

This is normal.

But you should develop a hobby together.  Bird watching.  Astronomy.  Biking.  Whatever.

At 23, you're at the peak of your health.  From here on out you both need to work to maintain it.  Do it together.

Whatever you do, don't nag him about it.  Do that, he'll withdraw.  You'll want more, and he'll withdraw more.  To the death spiral this leads. Honesty is the solution.

Answer 3

Yes, normal.

Also, there is a little insecurity at first until you both  learn to trust, and experience will take care of that.

Relax.  Enjoy your time without him and let him enjoy his.

Answer 4

My husband and i have been married 4 years. I love him more then anything. I miss him when he goes out with the guys but i understand he needs guy time. I actually encourage it now. find something you love to do so that you can have your own time too. it will make your relationship stronger. After 2 years about i started needing "me time" when he is home to much i tell him to go to a friends house or something so that i can sing at the top of my lungs while i clean in my pjs with out him getting in my way. also i cant paint with him looking over my shoulder. and my daughter and i need to have pur "girls time" with out daddy sometimes

Answer 5

It may not be normal but i feel the exact same way.

i just want him to go away...bu then as soon as he does i want him to come back. i always get upset when he would rather go with friends than with me.

youre not alone out there.

Answer 6

I'm engaged but I'd say that's normal... my fiance wants to know where I am 24/7 not because he's controlling but because he'd worry about me if he didn't know - I'm the same way, he'd call me and tell me if he decided to go out for a walk even... heh, it's just the kind of people we are.

Answer 7

You will be totally needy if you don't stop this now.

Just call or text him whenever you feel the need.  

Answer 8

no you are not a weirdo

you are just in love with your hubby

you have something i wish i had

as the years goes by   you won't miss him as much.

but you will still love him.

and that means alot.

Answer 9

Totally normal!!

I do the same things sometimes, and when I go out sometimes I actually miss him so much that I either invite him to join or go home early.

Sometimes it really sucks loving someone so so much.  It's all so confusing.

Answer 10

it is true love

Answer 11

Normal! You love him, good for you! :)

Answer 12

i'm married with 3 children oldest 12 years the youngest 21 months i totally ENJOY when my hubby and i are apart i enjoy when we are together. I miss him if he is on a long buissness trip yeah but, he's gone for a day i have no problem at all with it. He and I both do our own thing i'm ofen off doing my stuff he's off fishing with his Dad we both enjoy our together and our seperate lives. We must be the freaks.

Answer 13

Because he is living that part of his life without you and you realize he could STILL be happy without you.

I miss my wife when she is out busy too, but I enjoy her company,but I also like a little alone time and I think she does too.

Answer 14

I have been married 8 years now and we are lucky because we like our space.  My hobby is art and he goes fishing and plays poker with the guys.  When we do things together we always have a wonderful time. We don't always have to joined at the hip.  We are past the newly wed stage and are very comfortable with each other.  Tonight the guys are in another room playing poker and I made snacks and I am on Yahoo answers.  Tomorrow we are spending the weekend in the mountains hiking near our home.

Answer 15

It may be normal my wife is that way to. But do not smother him it will end your marriage as quick as anything else..

Tell him how you feel them give him his space to spend time away from you and the kids.

Men need this for some reason. I know I do...  

Answer 16

Maybe you should get a babysitter and go out with your friends instead of sitting home.  I felt the same way.  I didn't mind him going out . I wanted to be out having fun also.  lol

Just because you are married with children doesn't mean you can't get with your friends and do some shopping , have dinner, go to the spa, maybe the gym, or a night out on the town.

If you can't afford a sitter then have him watch the kids and do your thing.

The problem maybe that you need to get out more yourself .   Have some fun.  Then go out together once in awhile.  

Answer 17

You are definitely not a weirdo. I think this is a combination of two things. The fact that you have parted ways in the past may unsubconsciously make you afraid of losing him again. The second reason is because he is your husband and best friend, he brings you happiness and when he is not around it makes you sad. This is perfectly normal.

Answer 18

Funny, I have had the same experience, so for me, its normal. Don't get me wrong, I want him to have his own thing and all. But yes I did miss him when he left with friends. Maybe try and arrange time for you to go out with your friends when he goes out with his. Leave the kids at the sitter's! Then meet up during later the same day! Also try and get friends that are married and you both like each of them so you can go as a couple out!

Answer 19

it's normal because i have the same issue and i dont mind him going out is just i miss him so much. This is what my husband came up with to help me not get lonely, he calls me every hour or so just to talk briefly and it helps at least i feel that when he is out he still thinks about me hope it helps.

Answer 20

You may think you don't want to be with him 24/7 but the fact of the matter is you are a newly wed and most newly weds are stuck up each other's butt for a few years. My hubby and I are still newly weds and we do this too. It isn't that you want to control him or anything like that. you just want to be near him. It is normal.  

Answer 21

Newlywed and missing/wanting to be with him often is COMPLETELY NORMAL.  Its completely cool to just be dorky and tell him, "Hey, I missed you while you were gone."  I'm sure he'll understand + want to make you feel special like the special lady you probably are.  

I'm a newlywed too with the same qualms.  What helps is his care + consideration + myself being straight forward about my feelings and needs.  We love taking turns planning the wkends together too.