Question for people with older children.?

Question

looking back at the way you raised your childern.... what are the things you are proud of? what are the things you wish you did different. im a new mother just looking for your outlook on parenting.

Answer 1

trust yourself....I showed them independence and they are truly that

I showed them giving and respect for others

I would have trusted my self that I knew what I was doing

they are awesome adults

My son has his own business

My daughter is a early childhood educator

Enjoy them they grow up so fast, all the best!

Answer 2

proud that I never treated them like kids as in spoke down to them, and they are happy that I didnt, unproud of one tiem I lied to one of them after i told her I NEVER would but I havent again, never lie to yuor kids

Answer 3

I just regret not realising that time spent directly with them one to one, if possible, is all they ever wanted or needed. It is also the only thing I miss now they have grown up. Nothing you can do or say or give will ever mean as much to them as just being with them. I can hear them now "can you play with me, can we make something, can you read to me" and I can hear myself  "in a minute, later, tommorow", but the tommorows eventually stop coming and later becomes too late. You will never regret neglecting anything so you can give that time to your kids but visa versa will come back and haunt you.

Answer 4

ugh - all that time wasted being their "friend".  took years for the light to dawn that i am their mother, NOT their friend.

if your mother tells you "for pity's sake, clean up that room!", what do you do?

if your friend tells you "clean up your room!", what is your reaction (dunno about anyone else, but mine is MYOFB).

nothing wrong with being a friendly mother, but i am the parent, not their buddy/pal/chum/mate/any other synonym.

if you don't mean it, don't say it.  i HATE HATE HATE it when i'm out in public and i hear someone tell a toddler "get off the floor or i'm leaving you here!".  they're telling the child she is so unimportant, they can walk away and abandon her without a thought. THEN, when they turn around and go back and pick her up, they've taught her she cannot rely on their word.

if you dont' want to hear the answer, don't ask the question.

ask me once, the answer is maybe; ask me twice, the answer is NO.

pick your battles - toilet training, eating, sleeping through the night, none of these are worth stressing over because no bride in history ever walked down the aisle wearing pampers cruisers under her wedding gown and hiding a bottle or toodie in the wedding bouquet, nor has any wedding banquet ever been catered by opening little jars of gerber's.

teach them not to be afraid to make you the bad guy.  my daughter loved that one - "oooooh, MAN!!!!!  i would LOVE to go to your unsupervised bush party featuring a guest appearance by the h**l's angels and catered by the local moonshiner even though i'm only 13  but, gosh, my mom, she's totally psycho - she'd come and, like, want to party with us and she'd probably bring Donny Osmond 8-tracks." is a lot more socially acceptable than "um.. no... i don't want to".

Answer 5

I was the disciplinarian as it were and sometimes I think I was to hard on them, by reacting to quick. I should have always put more thought into their punishment which really were rare, but often crucial, Drinking, blowing the engine in the car, fighting.Although they never did these things twice, and they harbor no bad feelings towards me at those times I felt later that I over reacted , and given more thought would have done things differently .Good Luck I hope your children become the adults mine have.

Answer 6

spell mother 'guilt' is all you need to know

Answer 7

i'm expecting my 1st right now, and here are some of the "words of wisdom" i've gotten:

-Practice what you preach.....it will be easier for them to learn.

-Always settle for their "best", not what you think their "best" should be

-Try to talk to them when they've done something wrong and let them know you love them. yelling will make them scared of you, and you'll find they will keep even bigger and worst things from you...until it's too late.

-Never compare them to other children.....they're all different!!!!

-Listen to them!!!!!!!!!

-Never let them fall asleep or leave the house without telling them you love them. you never know if it will be the last time you get to say it to them!!!!!!!!!! (that goes for all loved ones as well!)

Answer 8

im proud of raising them on strict rules including: 1. Getting Good Grades, 2. Including them in sport activities, and 3. raising them in a public school system. It made my son into someone who is very strong and was recently accepted at florida state.

Answer 9

i have a10 yr old daughter.. I'm not with the mother but remain close friends with Her. i see my kid as much as possible.......  i kinda can feel where u r coming from.  my best advice is to play with your child. Encourage their imagination.. draw with them.. let them be creative. The most important thing is to listen to your child. Because what they say is the most valuable thing in the world. i am proud of listening to my Daughter and letting her know that her thoughts and input are of value and treasured.  All i can say is really listen to ur kid ..time goes by too quickly.    parents should be a source of inspiration..  its fkn hard work but its worth it.......................... all the best mate!

Answer 10

Ok here are some pointers:

1. Love them and let them know it.

2. Never go a day without a hug

3. Tell them they can do anything or be anything.

4. Always encourage them, never ever put them down

5. If they need to disciplined, do it privately

6.Always read to them

7. Never miss a pediatric appointment.

8. Begin now to feed them healthy food.

9.Good Luck

10. God Bless

Answer 11

I am glad that my girls have grown into honest adults.  I wish I would have been stricter with them when they were dating, but it probably wouldn't have made any difference.  Like when your 18 year old wants to move in with a boy make sure you know the boy VERY well and they are planning a lifetime commitment.   Boys are creepy when you have girls.  So if you have boys please teach them how to treat girls nicely.  

I don't think I taught them enough about how to budget their money though I did try to teach them how to spend it wisely and how to work for it.  

When I aquired the task of taking care of my mother for 9 years I was proud of them helping out as much as they were able.  Yeah, I paid them but they needed to earn some money as much as I needed a break.  It taught them compassion and that if you do a good job you will be paid for it.  They even took her to a funeral of one of her friends when I was ill.  

Basically I am happy with how they were raised as I did the best I could at the time.  I was able to be a stay at home mom which was very important to me.  And spend time with them  doing things that we all enjoyed even although it didn't cost lots of money.

Answer 12

No one has the kid they want. You think you're going to do a  better job than your parents but in the end... my sons a dumbass. My daughters an attention crazy. I spoiled them and they are dependant on me in every way.

What I would change? Nothing =) I love my kids ^.^