Question for those who suffer with or have suffered with depression?

Question

Have any of you had times where you feel like your confidence is being chipped away at and you're slowly falling back into depression but you don't feel you have the heart to fight it anymore?

Have any of you experienced that? What have you done or did you do to either stop it, or did you just let it lead you wherever it took you?

Do any of you feel almost comforted by it, like it belongs with you, or it keeps you company, its where you feel at home, etc, or anything like that?

Just wondering. Thanks.

Answer 1

How interesting that you should find comfort in depression.  I sometimes find it a relief to remember that I suffer with depression when I feel really bad.  Is that weird?  That feeling that it's mine and I can just curl up in it, and because I take medication and my husband is aware of the extent of my depression, I feel like I can really embrace it when I feel low.  Similar to how you feel "at home", I suppose.  I am sick of fighting it.  It's too hard, so at the moment I'm going from day to day waiting for something to change for me.  I'm at home with my 3 kids all the time while my husband works 100 hours a day(!), so any plans for therapy etc. always seem to be bottom of the priority list.  Wow what a sob story!! Sorry to rattle on!! To wrap this up, I have pretty much experienced all of what you asked! Jo x    

Answer 2

Yah...it did comfort me

when i realized it was gone i was really really sad

but it wouldn't bring back my depression...

and that made me sadder

Answer 3

I've suffered from depression for as long as I can remember. Two years ago I made some inroads and have had a good couple of years, feeling more relaxed and happy, after a really rocky patch where I was suicidal for a few months. I used to think I would never have self-esteem or confidence, but I've experienced that a little now.

My depression is still there in the background, and I'm sure it always will be. It's part of me. It doesn't bother me, because I'm in control of it at the moment. There are reasons why I don't see it as a negative thing, and why it can comfort me. Depression makes you experience some unpleasant and horrible lows - especially with self-esteem and what you think your future holds. However, it can make you very able to talk about your feelings and share them with people. It can help you to sympathise and reassure other people with depression. This is such a rewarding thing to do. It always reminds me how human I am as well - that I am at the mercy of my emotions, and that I must be good to other people to make sure I don't cause them similar problems. This is quite a nice feeling.

I'm dealing with it quite well, and there is nothing special about me, so I know everyone else can too. It's comforting to know that I can help my friends because of my own experience. There are times when I think I don't have the heart to fight it anymore, but there are a few things I rely on to keep me going.

Good food, exercise, and surrounding myself with nice people is most of it. Also, relaxation exercises are a big help. The Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns works for me as well. I try to retain perspective where I can. Although depression makes it harder to do this, and distorts things, whenever something makes me upset I think 'is it worth my life being rendered unhappy because of this'. I try and let that guide me, and as long as I don't make other people depressed by doing so, should be ok.

You will find a way that works for you. Just explore the options, remember that most things which seem impossible are actually achievable, and try not to be too harsh on yourself if you can.

Answer 4

Well I can only speak from my personal experience with depression but I'd say I dont experience "falling back into it" as such. At the moment its something I have to fight every single day.  There are good days and bad days, and bad periods within days though.

At times the emotional pain can feel really intense and overwhelming and I do experience suicidal feelings as it gets too much. Sometimes I think I just get through depression, for what? To go through more depression lol.  Some times when its like that theres nothing I can do to snap out of it, and just have to ride it out.  But it does pass.  Other times though I can get really into doing things to take my mind off my negative feelings.

I wouldnt say my depression comforts me, no way, I hate it! It has been a part of who I am for so so long, and it is weird to think I'd be a completly different person without it. But thats a good thing as all depression does it hold me back, and it can be replaced with new positive sides to who I am.

Answer 5

I suffer from bipolar, since i was 15 i always knew i was different to other people my age, i felt that i was wired the wrong way and the doctors just prescribed me "talking therapy" i'm 19 now and only got diagnosed with bipolar 18 months ago.

I often feel weak, that i can't go on, i've ended up in hospital from attempted suicide 3 times and when people ask me why i do it i just answer....i don't want to fight myself anymore, this is me.

i don't try and be someone else, i dont hate my disorder, but i hate how much it hurts other people i am close to because half the time i am too selfish and wrapped up in my own world that i don't see how much i hurt other people till it's too late.

i try and make myself see "life is what you make of it" i try each day to be optimistic about life but i feel like i'm fighting off my demons in order to make life a little bit easier, sometimes it gets too much and i can't take it anymore.

but then i always managed to pick myself up again.

i have my good and bad days, just like everyone else.

Answer 6

yes i have, i tried to fight off that feeling, by trying to be optimistic, it didn't work so now I'm back where i started, i don't feel comforted by it at all. it tortures me.  

Answer 7

lol id love to know what was going through your mind when you took that pic

"god my biceps are great!"  lol

Answer 8

i suffered depression for years,then found excersice. its the best thing to cure it.if you feel you are slipping back get out for a good long walk or join a gym--its great honestly

Answer 9

Hi

I suffered from depression all the way through University and although I am "recovered" now, I don't think you ever truly recover. Every time you feel a bit sad or down, a little part of you wonders if this is the day the depression begins again. I know what you mean about feeling comforted by it. It's almost like it becomes such a big part of who you are, you don't know who you'd be without it. It starts to define you as a person and that's why I think it's really dangerous. It envelops you and, as you said, sometimes it feels easier to let it take you and give up. I am thankful every day that I didn't do this.

I'm glad I don't feel this way very much any more though. It was a tough period of my life and although I felt helpless at the time, it has made me stronger as a result!

Answer 10

hi,

yes I have felt like this so many times and in many ways i am in that position at the moment. It's hard to keep fighting. The only way I got through it was trough the support of the professionals and by trying my best to keep going and distracting myself etc, it was or is by no means easy.

I think many people with depression have felt this and also the same feelings you have about being comforted by it, although maybe that's not the best way to describe it. when you have been depressed for a very long time, it does become part of you, your life etc and it's hard to imagine not having it because it's something that you loose but I think it's something best lost than keeping and you can learn to be someone who can be kept company by better feelings!

best of luck

x

Answer 11

try not to self medicate - i know there is temptation - i try to go for a run everyday - otherwise i feel lazy and worse. sometoimes you just have to tell yourself that you need to get thru the day - try to watch somethign moderately entertaining on TV - i also volunteer/.

Answer 12

Yes, that is common, there are times when, for whatever reason your medication does not seem to be working. Or, perhaps it isn't the best on offer for you anymore. Go to see your Doctor, and tell him how you feel and take ownership of the problem, and ask for his/her advice.

Answer 13

I've been suffering from depression for a couple years now and it's not easy for me, at all.

I make things worst with use of drugs and alcohol.

What gets me through a hurtful, hard time are my friends telling me to not give up.

Basicly I let my depression guide me. I'm very low in thought and responsibilty nowadays; so why not.

I'm used to my depression... so it's become normal to me.