Questionable Ethics in the Adoption Process?

Question

I have recently learned that I am infertile, so my husband and I have been considering adoption. However, since I have been looking up information about adoption, I've read many articles that indicate there is a lot of scandal and unethical practices in the process.

If I were to adopt a child, I would not want it to be through unethical or immoral means. Can someone please explain to me how/why there is so much controversy, and how to avoid it when adopting?

Answer 1

The best way to avoid it is to go through foster care.  You can learn about the ethical concerns in adoption, but most of them do not involve foster care (although some do, depending mainly on the state).  Most of the time, foster care adoption IS ethical, as it is in the best interests of the child.  Most other forms of adoption are unethical more often than not, and are not in the best interests of the child.  You CAN find other forms of adoption, sometimes, that are ethical, but it would be difficult to ensure that everyone involved has good intentions.  Better to just go with foster care and trust your instincts.

Good for you for doing your research first!  You wouldn't believe how many people just want a baby, and don't care how they get "it".

Answer 2

The only way to truly avoid "buying a baby" is to live in the country of desire and educate yourself on whats really happening. Listen to human right organizations and get to know the mother and family of the child being placed. Make sure its not simply because a mother is poor.

Dont settle for a simple DNA test and birth certificate when the paperwork can be easily doctored and money takes priority over human welfare.

If its not possible to do that then foster care is your best bet and those children need homes as much as anyone else.

Answer 3

Some parents adopt kids because some states give money every month to support the child but they don't use the money for the child but instead use it as their "income" and quit their job and live a fabulous life living off their kid (basically).

Adoption is not immoral.  You should do it.  Usually parents who already have kids do the above ^

Answer 4

There are so many scandals in adopting because girls will LIE to you.  They will.  They will use you for your money and you might go through a lot of heartache.  My parents went through the same thing.  Myself and my two siblings are all adopted.  We have heard so many stories from my mom (my adoptive "real" mom, not my birth-mother) about girls who lied to them, and how they would get phone calls from strange men asking them if they are interested in a baby.  

What you should do is get an adoption/family lawyer.  They will be able to help you stay in the ethical path to adoption.  They will do research for you and help you find legitimate adoption agencies.  Also, just the mention of them might help to scare away fake prospects.

You might not be able to avoid it entirely, though, no matter how you try.  Good luck to you.

Answer 5

Hi, I work at Catholic Charities and at our office we are partnered with an adoption agency and I can assure we are scandal free. I would look up a Catholic Charities near to you or find one close to where you live and contact them. They re all over the US. Also Catholic Charities sounds like a "charity" but it's really a mix of different programs to help people. Here at our office we have a Foster/ Adopt Program, we help people pay bills, etc.

Here's the website: www.catholiccharitiesusa.org

Good Luck!

Answer 6

Dear Snowbunny,

WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF ADOPTION!!

First let me applaud you for making this a concern for yourself! Many people don't care to know about these things! The simple fact that you are interested in educating yourself is a wonderful first step to being a fantastic (adoptive) parent.

I would suggest that you do a little research into adoption from all sides - not just the perspective of the adoptive parent - to better aquaint yourself with the different types of adoption and the possible issues involved with each. It will help you navigate the process more ethically and easily and will help you become a better parent for your future child.

Hang around here for a while (talk about a "real world" education!), read some blogs, join an adoption discussion board, read, read, read! Adoption is a facinating subject and it is full of emotion, legalities, issues and many, many points of view!

I would highly reccomend investigating foster care adoption as, in my humble opinion, it is the most ethical way to adopt. It is NOT perfect but it has many benefits as far as support, cost and you will be providing a home to a child in your area who is deperately in need of a loving home. (You may find out that this is not for you, but it is certainly worth a look!)

Please accept my heartfelt wishes for a positive, healthy and ETHICAL adoption! Best of luck to you and your family!! I hope to see you here again! <3

ETA: Here are some websites you might find useful:

http://www.ethicanet.org/itemlist.php?pa...

http://www.karensadoptionlinks.com/pear/

http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=ethical...

http://www.exiledmothers.com/adoption_fa...