Questioning this Adoption Agency?

Question

My husband and I had looked into adopting at Sacramento Adoption Center. I am seriously question his practice and adoption all together. It is all about the adoption agency making money. This is a quote of his website " If you choose to adopt a newborn, you can expect that your child will be released directly to you from the hospital." Horrible. They treat there practice like a used car lot. Has anyone else dealt with this practice? Or a bad agency in general?

It is really horrible how Adoption is taken so lightly. I had talked to another couple that was looking to adopt and it is made me sick what they had say, they had passed on a baby because because the mom and dad was ugly and she lived in a homeless shelter. Does anyone have uplifting stories? My heart goes out to first mothers that dealt with horrible agencies.

Answer 1

And what is wrong about the baby being released directly to the adopting couple from the hospital?  I agree that passes on a baby because the mom was homeless, was a a bit ridiculous, but if that is what the couple did, I know that the birth mom found another couple.  When we adopted our first child, a son, we were not the first parents that his biological picked-  they changed their mind- however because they did, we got a precious son. There are horrible agency I suppose but we went through an adoption lawyer and had great experiences with both kids, and moms.

Answer 2

How else should they handle it?

I don't understand your objection to the quote you posted.  That's common practice - if a birth mother chooses to relinquish her newborn for adoption, where else would it go but to the adoptive parents?  It's the norm these days for birth mothers to have an active role in choosing the adoptive parents.  Not only do adoptive parents take the baby home from the hospital, but many times they are also in the delivery room with the birth mother.

Even if someone does adopt a newborn, and the baby is released to that person/couple straight from the hospital - the story does NOT start there.  Before that can happen, the prospective parent(s) must have completed the requirements for adoption in their home state - including a home study.  Someone won't be able to just call this agency and say "I want to adopt a newborn.  When should I be at the hospital to pick up my child?"

And yes - adoption costs money.  No matter what agency you go through, adoption is going to cost $15,000 - $25,000, sometimes more depending on the birth mother's expenses and various other details.  That's most especially true if you are set on adopting a newborn.  Would you expect to get a child for free???

If the price tag of adoption is a problem for you and your husband, you may want to consider adopting older children - those which are in foster care and waiting for permanent homes.  Most of the time, the cost is substantially less, and there are additional government (federal and state) subsidies which will help offset the cost of raising older children.

If adoption is the path you wish to take - pursue it.  But pursue it with a whole heart, and be sure you are ready to take on everything necessary - including expenses.  If you think it "just costs too much" - look at it this way.  If you were to have a child biologically, add up all the expenses you'd have from the beginning (pregnancy tests included), all the way through discharge from the hospital.  Don't take any insurance into account - most birth mothers who give their children up for adoption don't have insurance.  You might be surprised at what it costs to have a child.  Maybe then you won't be so shocked that an organization like the Sacramento Adoption Agency wants to charge you to adopt a child.

Magicpointeshoes:  They can "promise" that an adoptive parent can be present for the birth of the baby because many times, the birth mother has chosen the adoptive parents *before* she goes into labor, and has also requested they be present during the birth.

Answer 3

now days when you are adopting,know the agencie you are going thru-there is so much black marketing going on.also,if you pay cash for a baby not a very good idea at all.just be really careful.the best place to adopt and not get screwed is any wher in the state of utah. there are mormons all over the united states.[no im not mormon] i would go right to the church and get what info.you could get as fare as adopting goes.

Answer 4

If you call the Department of Children Services, they might have information for you.  I know Texas has a website that lets you check out an agency.  There is also word of mouth that helps you on finding out if an agency is ethical.

Answer 5

I really dont know much about adoption.. as for that couple that were not greatful for the chance that they had.. they should not even be able to adopt.. how degrading is that!

Good luck to you though!

Answer 6

My idea of an uplifting adoption story is when the mom gets the help and support she need to mother her baby. Often times it is a matter of finances that has a mother concerned about raising her baby or maybe a lack of confidence or not knowing how irreplacable she is to her baby.

I love the stories of moms and babies staying together.

Answer 7

I agree. I am adopting too and I put myself on their list and am regretting it. They let this one couple that are divorcing adopt a baby.

I will not be doing much more buisness with them, but here is another I am using, that I like very much and my friend has used it and she loved it:

http://www.adoptionhelp.org/

They have listings from everywhere in the world.

Good luck and god bless!

Answer 8

I was curious because I live locally to them, so I googled.  I have no idea how that adoption center works, but their website has the usual coercion triggers in the three birthmother stories, and on the looking to adopt page.  How they can promise that the potential adoptive parents can be present at the hospital when the baby is born is just awful!

Edit to add:  Oh my.  Did someone really just suggesting the best place to adopt from is Utah from the Mormons?  Aren't many of the most newsworthy unethical adoptions that are being contested done in Utah? http://www.babyselling.com/

Edit to reply directed in my direction:  It is a promise that they cannot make across the board.  There is no guarantee that the expectant mother will call the agency when she is in labor.  There is no guarantee that the expectant mother will want the potential adoptive parents in the room witnessing the birth.  An expectant mother giving birth should not be encouraged that this expectation is okay.  It is coercive.  I know right well that an expectant mother can choose it, I chose it not knowing any better.  There is plenty of time after the termination of parental rights is signed for the adoptive parents to bond with their child... that place is not in the hospital.

Answer 9

You know, when my brother and sister in law were in Korea adopting my niece, they met another couple.  One who was actually jealous that my brother and sister in law were adopting a girl, and "all they got" was a boy.  People can be a little bizarre.  I think I would question the sensitivity of the agency you are talking about.  Have you tried other places, like Catholic Charities?  Good luck, I know it is a long road, but I applaud your choices!

Answer 10

what don't you have to foster first now days?

well my little sister when she was being adopted whe came straight from the hospital because her mom was in drugs

and my parents have dealt with bad agencies when they we adopting all of us which include 7 kids.

5 which are related and me and my sis. we were lucky because no potential adopting parent wants teenagers or take their siblings too. yeah that's how most people are they dint want a kid who has problem cause by drinking or drugs.

well they are healthy and exceed in school. we are all thankful for this chance to have a family.

Answer 11

I took a quick look at the WEB site.  It has the typical glowing (usually fake) "testimonials"  from "birth" mothers who are just so honored to be used by the agency to make money for them.  Big red flag!

I think that if an agency is making promises like taking the baby home from the hospital and being there for delivery, they are over-promising to lure clients to sign up with them.  Another big red flag.  Some adoptive parents "get lucky" and their adoption does happen that way but I truly do not think it is the norm.  A thousand things can happen.  The father might want to be in the delivery room and not want a thing to do with the adoptive parents.  The mother might not want relative strangers groping her belly and looking up her business.  The grandparents might want to be there.  The mother could choose to take the baby home before relinquishment.  She could ask for interim foster care.  She could ask a family member to take the baby home.

Adoptive parents are also victims of unethical adoption practices.  And they get a double whammie - they get slammed big time in the pocketbook at the same time they are dealing with emotional devastation.

My heart goes out to first mothers who have dealt with these agencies and my heart goes out to adoptive parents who have to deal with false promises from the same agencies.