Questions for parents (to do with what ages you permit your children to do things)?

Question

#1 - What age would you stop giving your children a set bedtime and let them decide for themselves when to go to bed?

#2 - What age would you permit your child to group date?

#3 - What age would you permit your child to date? (one on one)

#4 - What age would you allow your child to have a cellphone?

#5 - What age would you allow your child to get an email address?

#6 - A bank account?

#7 - A bank account with them in charge of their card?

#8 - To walk to school? (assuming it is a reasonable distance away)

#9 - To use the internet unsupervised?

#10 - To have internet access in their room?

#11 - To get a job?

#12 - To stay home alone for more than 20 minutes?

#13 - To stay home alone all day?

#14 - Also, how much housework/chores would you expect children of these ages to do every week (or daily if that is easier)

- 5

- 8

- 10

-12

-15

-18 (if they still live at home)

Thanks =)

Answer 1

#1) As long as they are in school, they should be going to bed at a certain time (You can be more lenient during summer and weekends, and when they are about 13 or 14 they can somewhat decide on their days off when they want to go to bed)

#2) I actually dated a guy for the first time when I was 13. When I was 11 I had my first "boyfriend" more of just a really good friend. All though we did kiss... No tongue though :-)

#3) see number 2

#4) cell phones at about 16 (this is when they start to get more independent and want to go out "later" and you would want to be able to get into touch with them. Only on limited minutes!!!)

#5) I had a monitored e-mail address when I was about 10!! But I had more "privacy" by about 14.

#6) Bank accounts are amazing for saving money!! I had one opened for me when I was about 8!! Until you are legal age you have 100% control over it. I wouldn't give them a bank CARD until they are about 12 and can be trusted with it!

#7)see number 6

#8) completely depends on where they live!!! I lived in a small town where everyone knew everyone and I walked to school when I was about 8 with my 10 year old brother. I was close though. If they school is in the city (busy roads and buses etc) I wouldn't suggest it until about 14!!!

#9) internet... maybe 14? there is always going to be the history if you are worried. But at 14 you don't need to be reading their e-mails and "hovering"

#10) internet access in their room... depends on the child... You can put child blocks on their so you know they can only get into safe surfing... 14 I would say as well with secure sights!!

#11) 14 is a good time to get a summer job doing something easy...

#12)11 or 12 (depends on the child as well)

#13) 13ish also depends on the child!!!

#14)

5 - clean their messes and help clean room!

8 - clean their own room, make beds as best they can and clean the messes they make around the house

10 - help do dishes/dishwasher daily. and above

12 - do the dishes 3 days a week, vacume once a week clean room and make bed daily. same as above.

15 - own laundry, bathrooms as needed and same as above.

18 - 50 50 with what the parents do. They are now an adult!! Should also pay rent!

Answer 2

#1 - What age would you stop giving your children a set bedtime and let them decide for themselves when to go to bed? 15

#2 - What age would you permit your child to group date?14

#3 - What age would you permit your child to date? (one on one)16

#4 - What age would you allow your child to have a cellphone?16

#5 - What age would you allow your child to get an email address?12

#6 - A bank account? my kids have had bank account since birth

#7 - A bank account with them in charge of their card?16

#8 - To walk to school? (assuming it is a reasonable distance away)8

#9 - To use the internet unsupervised?14

#10 - To have internet access in their room?18

#11 - To get a job?16

#12 - To stay home alone for more than 20 minutes?13

#13 - To stay home alone all day?15-16

#14 - Also, how much housework/chores would you expect children of these ages to do every week (or daily if that is easier)

- 5 less than 10 minutes

- 8 10 minutes

- 10 10-15 minutes

-12 15-20 minutes

-15 30 minutes

-18 (if they still live at home) 1 hour

Answer 3

1.16

2.16

3. 17

4. 16

5.15

6. saving account 9 checking account 17

7.17

8. 16

9. when they are out of school and on there own  LOL

10. same has #9

11.16

12.that depends on how mature mine were 10

13.12

14.5-clean their room at least 3 times a week

     8- same has 5 but maybe some dusting

    10- same has 5,8 and empty dish washer or wash dishes, clean other rooms

    12- same has 5,8,10 and laundry, dishes, vacuming

    15- same has 5,8,10,12 and now bathrooms, garbage, mow the lawn, learn to cook

    18- just about everything above and now they should be ready to be on their own

Answer 4

1. 14

2. 16

3. 16

4. 12 (under strict supervision)

5. 10 (under VERY strict supervision-we get the password and are allowed to check her emails whenever we please)

6. 16 (or whenever she gets her first job and has a need for her own bank account)

7. 16 again

8. 12

9. Depends what you mean by unsupervised. We allow her to use it now at 10, but we check the history regularly to see what sites shes visiting.

10. 15.

11. 16 (maybe)

12. 14

Sorry-your questions are getting too long.

Answer 5

#1 - What age would you stop giving your children a set bedtime and let them decide for themselves when to go to bed?  

10

#2 - What age would you permit your child to group date?

15

#3 - What age would you permit your child to date? (one on one)

15

#4 - What age would you allow your child to have a cellphone?

15

#5 - What age would you allow your child to get an email address?

8

#6 - A bank account?

15

#7 - A bank account with them in charge of their card?

18

#8 - To walk to school? (assuming it is a reasonable distance away)

15

#9 - To use the internet unsupervised?

12

#10 - To have internet access in their room?

10

#11 - To get a job?

15

#12 - To stay home alone for more than 20 minutes?

10

#13 - To stay home alone all day?

12

#14 - Also, how much housework/chores would you expect children of these ages to do every week (or daily if that is easier)  

5- 10 minutes

8- 20 minutes

10- 35 minutes

12- 30 minutes

15- 45 minutes

18- one hour

for the chore thing, if you want a job well done you should stick to shorter time lengths:)

Answer 6

#1 - What age would you stop giving your children a set bedtime and let them decide for themselves when to go to bed? 13

#2 - What age would you permit your child to group date?10

#3 - What age would you permit your child to date? (one on one)12

#4 - What age would you allow your child to have a cellphone?7

#5 - What age would you allow your child to get an email address?6

#6 - A bank account?0

#7 - A bank account with them in charge of their card?12

#8 - To walk to school? (assuming it is a reasonable distance away)7

#9 - To use the internet unsupervised?6

#10 - To have internet access in their room?any age

#11 - To get a job?any age they wanted one

#12 - To stay home alone for more than 20 minutes? 7

#13 - To stay home alone all day? 10

#14 - Also, how much housework/chores would you expect children of these ages to do every week (or daily if that is easier)

- 5-0

- 8-0

- 10-10

-12-15

-15-15

-18 (if they still live at home)-30

Answer 7

Unfortunately, I can't see your answers while I'm composing mine, but I thought most of your ages were a bit young.

#1 Whenever they can get up on time without being awakened or acting sleepy. For me, it was about age 8, but I just got sleepy and went to bed. My kids were about the same, with no hard and fast bedtime once they wer about 8-10.

#2 age 13

#3 age 15 -- again depending on maturity

#4 Recent studies are showing physical damage being done to children who have sell phones, with a prediction of very high rates of alzheimer's when these kids grow up.

#5 and #9 Children should always be supervised to a certain degree on the internet to protect them from preditors.

#6 and #7 Age 10 is ok as long as a parent keeps track of it.

#8 Every neighborhood and child is different.

#10  A child should never have internet in their room.

#11 As soon as he wants to try to find one I would not hold him back. Both of my sons-in- law worked from an early age and they are the better for it. My own kids started at 14.

#12 age 10

#13 age 14

#14 I pretty much agree with your ages

Answer 8

Do you have kids? Date at 12? No way. No bedtime at 14? Not if they took advantage of it.

1....when they acted responsible about, it would depend on the kid.

2..age 14 for group dates

3.16 to date, maybe this would be flexable

4..cellphone also depends on kid. when they need it. 10 to 12

5..email addy resticted by me,  8 or 9.

6..as soon as they asked, I think ,ime at 10 for a savings

7..when they earn their own money

8..in a group mine went at 6, but alone 8 or 9 (it was only a couple of blocks, on back streets

9..this would be up to the child also, maybe 14 with me checking sometimes

10..16 maybe

11..16 for a very small amount of hours that did not interfere with school. I can support most hobbies and allowence. School is first

12..10 for a coule hours, depends on kid

13...10 to 12

14 dishes some times, trash every week, their own rooms, pick up and help as needed.

My kids are grown so I've done all this. my 11 y/o grand lives with me so i based a lot on her. She's a good kid and responsible.

Answer 9

Oh, boy. You have to know your kids. You have to make these judgments based on each child, and how he or she responds to getting some rights and freedoms.  I think that trying to set specific rules and ages in a void will lead to lots of arguments and frustrations later. We gave our kids (now aged 16, 18 and 22) a bit of freedom (ie; boy/girl parties, then group dates, etc) and pulled back or increased based on how they behaved and handled things.

good luck!

Answer 10

#1 - set bedtime - 14 , however I would maintain a set quiet time in their bedroom at a set time in respect of all the others sharing the home.

#2 -child / group date? 15  supervised school dances etc. .

#3 - child to date? 16

#4 - What age would you allow your child to have a cellphone? 10 (although we live in a rurual area and it was for emergancy only) age 14 restriction were lifted, but minute monitored closely.

#5 - What age would you allow your child to get an email address? 12  Parentally controlled

#6 - A bank account? 10  with an ATM (only after they had a job and started depositing hard earned monies)

#7 - A bank account with them in charge of their card? Above answer applies here as well



#8 - To walk to school? (assuming it is a reasonable distance away)  Tough one here, never having had that one to think about

#9 - To use the internet unsupervised? Never a good idea without parental controls.  

#10 - To have internet access in their room? I prefered to get each child a laptop with wireless, kids will choose to be in an open family room rather then tucked away in their rooms, unless they are doing something they didn't and don't want to share with their parent. . . .or should be doing in the first place.

#11 - To get a job? 16 (only if their grades are maintained, school work is completed on a rutien basis and it still allows leftover time for "family time".  

#12 - To stay home alone for more than 20 minutes? 8

#13 - To stay home alone all day? 12  unless this means all day every day, like say for an entire summer. . . I would change that to 14 as long and only if the child recognized and follows the house rules.

#14 - Amount of time spent on chores daily

5 = 5 -15 min

8 =  15-20 min     Dishes

10 = 20-25 min    + vac & dust their rooms  

12 = 25-30 min    + their own laundry with your instruction  

15 = 30-45 min    + preparing some meals

18 = 45 mins        + meal planning and shopping

Answer 11

#1 - What age would you stop giving your children a set bedtime and let them decide for themselves when to go to bed?

Teens if they go to bed on their own by 10pm, if not...then bedtime is 10 lol.

#2 - What age would you permit your child to group date?

15-16

#3 - What age would you permit your child to date? (one on one)

16-17

#4 - What age would you allow your child to have a cellphone? When they are over 18, and can pay for it themselves....I'm not signing a contract!

#5 - What age would you allow your child to get an email address? 16ish maybe(if we have a comp them)

#6 - A bank account?

Our bank offers one at 12, so then. We'll roll over their savings(prior to 12) to their account then. As well as continue the major savings account for college, home, whatever they choose in life(within reason) seperately without their knowledge on it existing untill they are graduated.

#7 - A bank account with them in charge of their card?

16

#8 - To walk to school? (assuming it is a reasonable distance away) Wouldn't I'll drive them. We're in the country now, but even in the city...I'd not have them walking.

#9 - To use the internet unsupervised? Fully unsupervised, not ever while living in my home. We probably won't have internet any longer anyways, I'm already getting close to shutting it off now.

#10 - To have internet access in their room?

Never in my house.

#11 - To get a job?

15+

#12 - To stay home alone for more than 20 minutes?

15-16

#13 - To stay home alone all day?

Don't know if I ever would, but if I did deffinately not until 16-17

#14 - Also, how much housework/chores would you expect children of these ages to do every week (or daily if that is easier)

- 5: 20 mins a day

- 8: 30 mins a day

- 10: 40 mins a day

-12: 50 mins a day

-15: 1hr a day

-18 (if they still live at home) 2 hours a day

Thanks =)

Answer 12

if ur a parent you have a certain trust with your kids. its hard to set an age to something when it all depends on how well you raise them.

Answer 13

#1 - What age would you stop giving your children a set bedtime and let them decide for themselves when to go to bed?

That is totally subjective and based on maturity.  At what age would you the child show me that you are responsible enough to go to bed and get up on your own (literally on your own..  you can use an alarm or whatever, but if you want the privledge of going to bed when you want, you have to take the responsibility of getting up without me coming in and dragging you out of bed.

#2 - What age would you permit your child to group date?

Again, totally subjective on the maturity level that my child is showing.  Also, that may depend on the group of people going out.   Are these other kids likely to try to pressure my child into drinking, drugs or s*x?

#3 - What age would you permit your child to date? (one on one)

Same answer as above

#4 - What age would you allow your child to have a cellphone?

From the time they could figure out how to use one.  I dont have a land line, pay phones are disappearing.  And Im sorry, but today just isnt the same as 50 years ago when a kid could walk up to any adult safely.  It will be limited in features.  You by no means will be running up my cell phone bill, but you will have one.  When you can pay for it yourself is when you can have one with all the bells and whistles and services.

#5 - What age would you allow your child to get an email address?

When they are old enough to be on the computer.  Monitored.  As in I have the password to the account.  That could change as maturity progresses.  But that is not something to be up in your business.  Its because most kids dont think twice before giving out too much personal information or dont pick up on the signs of online predators.

#6 - A bank account?

From day 1.  It will have my name on it, as minors usually cant hold checking accounts by themselves.  But I fully support teaching children about finances, accounts, and budgets as early as possible.  It helps them in the long run when they first move out on their own.  A child/teen/young adult who knows how to handle money will be more likely to be more responsible with their accounts and purchases

#7 - A bank account with them in charge of their card?

Oh, you mean you want me to give them their own debit card!!!  Oh my!! lol.  Maturity.  When they show me they are responsible enough to keep a register of their account, balance their account, and not wrecklessly over draw their account.  Its not something you can just hand over, it has to be earned with small steps.

#8 - To walk to school? (assuming it is a reasonable distance away)

That would be very dependant on the area.  For example, the high school by my house can be walked to without going through anyone's yard or crossing the road, and its a relativly safe area, so I may consider it.  However, my friend's middle school district is very rough and ghetto.  They live within walking distance, but she nor I would let and child walk through there.

#9 - To use the internet unsupervised?

Maturity, not age, again.  When you show me that you can be on the net without advertising your name and phone number and address.  Even though I dont worry so much about p**n as most parents do (if your gonna look your gonna) I would still probably use parental controls until about 16 or so.  

#10 - To have internet access in their room?

Maturity.  Are they going to sit on the net all night when they should be sleeping, or use it responsibily?

#11 - To get a job?

For me, job is based on grades.  If you are doing poorly in school, you dont need a job because you need to be in tutoring or extended studying at home, not working.

#12 - To stay home alone for more than 20 minutes?

Maturity.  Are you going to do what your supposed to do?  Can I trust that you wont open the door to a stranger?  Do you know what to do in case the house catches on fire?  Are you going to catch the house on fire?  Are you going to do everything you are not allowed to do the second I walk out of the door?

#13 - To stay home alone all day?

Same as above

#14 - Also, how much housework/chores would you expect children of these ages to do every week (or daily if that is easier)

Again, very subjective to maturity, but....

- 5....  help clean up own toys, and as much studying as needed to do well

- 8...  help clean up own messes, clean own bedroom, as much studying as it takes

- 10...  same plus help clean common areas

-12...  same

-15...  same

-18 (if they still live at home)  same...

Thanks =)