Questions to ask for baby's sake?

Question

I need help figuring out things that need to be discussed in preparing for joint custody of a baby....(ex. who will pay medical bills, and who gets certain holidays) but what other questions do we need to figure out.....

Answer 1

Besides the standard financial questions, don't forget to discuss issues that involve the actual raising of your child, such as:

-  discipline methods and do you want your child having the same set of rules at both of your homes

- educational issues: does one of you prefer private over public school? who will pay for it if so? will you attend school functions/conferences together or take turns?

- decision making: such as, if Parent A is paying for daycare, does Parent B get a say in choosing the daycare facility? if Parent A has custody of the child on Saturdays, can Parent B still enroll the child in swimming lessons on Saturdays?

- dating: does either parent have strong feelings about their child being around the other parent's new boy/girlfriend? how will Parent A handle it if Parent B wants to move into their new partner's home after only dating for two months? what if Parent A has a new love interest every week and introduces their love interests to the child every week too?

- make sure you both agree to never bad mouth each other to the child

Basically, the point is to remember that raising a child is about much, much more than financial issues. Your goal with your child is to raise them into a functioning, well-adjusted adult, and this will be much harder to do if you and the other parent are not on the same page with the above issues. You two have to present a united front for your child. You are your child's first and most important role models and how you behave towards each other will dictate how they handle their future relationships.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Medical bills, visitation schedule like you said......Then child support payment amounts, school tutition, daycare expenses, if you will share the decisions on schooling, etc..  Even if there are no daycare expenses or school tutition, you will still want to have that decision set now.