Radical feminist with a very controlling father...?

Question

i just wondered what you make of the psychological details of this feminist... (*in no way meant to imply that all feminists have bad childhoods or anything low like that...*)

her father is a high ranking officer in the army, and was very authoritarian and controlling. her mother is very passive and whilst he was deployed she could pretty much get away with anything, but she also resented her mother for not standing up to her father. she's grown up to be the exact image of her him, very dominant and a control freak. they don't get on well at all.

is this some kind of freudian thing? is she trying to take back the power she feels denied as a child? is she confused between the alternating permissiveness she had with her mother and the over-controlling times when her father was at home? and isn't it ironic that whilst she claims to fight for equal rights, she sees herself as superior to everyone else?

thoughts please.

Answer 1

Are you talking about my sister, but only replacing Navy with Army?  

Seriously I think you're looking too deep into this situation and maybe she isn't looking clearly in the mirror.  Most of us develop traits of our parents, some develop traits of one parent over the other.  To blame it on the military upbringing or anything else is to simply not see things for what they truly are.  I too, use to blame my military father for my actions (I was yound, dumb and immature for doing this btw).  Now, that I have grown up and started to actually look outside of myself instead of focusing on myself, I realized that I can change who I am and should not blame my childhood for my adult behavior.  Since I made that wise choice, life is so much more enjoyable.  There is hope for your friend too, if she decides to be honest with herself and not listen to all the bull that feminists, psychologists, friends, etc. tell her about how she should be.  LIfe is much happier when you truly discover who you are and live accordingly (and listening to any one opinion isn't knowing who you are, you should search out all sorts of opinions and facts and then, in peace and silence over months and years, figure out who you are).

Answer 2

Radical feminists tend to have domineering male figures in their life someway or somehow.  I'm a feminist or should I say egalitarian because both of my parents are.

Answer 3

Yeah it's more of a personal/cathartic thing for many *radical* feminists, especially misandrist radical feminists who care more about women (i.e. dwarkin)

I would say that in her case she doesn't seek equality, just empowerment for her s*x, due to the dis-empowerment she felt for herself and her mother as the result of the patriarchal father figure.

In other words it's called a self-fulfilling prophecy, where you become the thing that you fear the most.