Raising my child in the US...?

Question

I'm half Egyptian and I live most of my life in Egypt. I live in the US now since I married a Marine out here. I'm 5 months pregnant and I have been thinking way too much about raising my child in the US and I have been so nervous. I see many Egyptian and Arab kids come out here and they get lost in all the freedom and forget the good things in life. I'm a first time mom and this is been making me not be able to sleep at night...I think about if he/she starts hanging out with the wrong kids in school and what it can lead and things of that nature...

My question is, parents who raised your kids in a foreign country, how did avoid all these challenges?

Answer 1

dont be anxious .

leave everything for time while you do your best in the present .

share your baby his /her moments of growth without anxiety .

relax and enjoy your motherhood to allow your baby a natural , normal childhood .

Answer 2

My teen boys are half American and half Mid East.  It is much easier to raise kids and find free time in Mid East to enjoy family and friends.  I know because my boys were born there and we stayed there for 10 years.  I found some things very unappealing  for my sons to grow up around.  (Arranged marriages, men spending too much time with their friends and colleagues and very little with their children and wife.)

No one can avoid challenges.  Your greatest challenge may be if you have a daughter and try to raise her in US.  (I have a friend trying to meet this challenge.)  I assume you would want to raise her to be conservative and modest.  If so, I believe it will be very important for your husband to teach her how a boy/men should treat her.  Show her values by example.  Do not shield her from inappropriate things, such as, Jamie Lynn Spears teen motherhood ordeal.  Use such things as a teachable moment.  Teach her empowerment.  Teach and reteach everything you and your husband value.  Take the time to talk to your children and to listen to them and observe them for signs of problems and happiness, too.

Answer 3

Well, being a southern boy I  would get out of the snow first thing tomorrow.  Life is a whole lot less hectic in say Texas!!!

However as a parent of five, all grown, my best advice is to not try to cure problems you don't have.  laying in bed worrying about things that may come will not prepare you for what will come and leave you too stressed to deal with what has come.

All parents worry about the future of their kids.  What kind of world are they inheriting.  Yesterday was so much better.

Still when you wake up real life is waiting, so do your worrying during the day and take action.

Remember they more God in your child's life, the more life in the child.

Answer 4

don't worry i live in Manhattan just like u and i am a proud Egyptian and i am so close to my mom i hang out with my friends but i still know right from worng it matters on how u treat the child when he was young to teach him/her the right way and nothing will go wrong

Answer 5

If you are  good parents with good principles you need not worry about other people, cultures whatever. Having a strong formidable childhood will be enough for them to see difference in others. He will only hang out with the wrong kids if he is one of the wrong kids and it doesn't sound like that will happen when you are the parent.

So where you will be living in the states matters. if you are living in L.A or NYC it might be a challenge. But if you are living in Vermont, Maryland, it might be a piece of cake?

Answer 6

It's a very valid and important question, particularly in our society today where often than not children are highly influenced by who they come into contact with or what they see and read on the TV, magazines and the net. Therefore i think the answer lies in being able to give your child not the answers (because we do not know what harmful things they will come into contact with) but the tools in order to be able to distinguish what is good and what is harmful for themselves.

I believe that the best way to 'control' or ensure that children maintain the same values that we hold high is too portray good values and morals in the home and instill what you think is right and wrong behavior from the beginning, from there i think the child will understand what correct ethical behaviors are and even if they do get mixed up with some bad children, they will have the moral authority to know that what those ppl are doing isn't right.

Mabye communicate with your husband about your concerns, and most of all just trust yourself and have confidence that you and your husband can raise a child with your good values

Answer 7

i believe that a good home with loving parents will make a child face all difficulties and make the right decisions wherever they are raised.

i dont mean to sound cliche, but my advice to u is whatever ur religion is, try to make it a big deal to ur child, teach him/her everything about it and make him become closer and closer to God.

and believe me this way he/she will find all the answers and make good choices even if he lives in another planet.

Remember, God gave us all the guidlines we need regardless of where we live.

nobody can deny the effect of societies and cultures on children but if u take care of two things:

1-make him/her aware of all aspects of their religion

2-be an open minded, "there for them" mother, so ur child will come everyday asking about stuff and not asking the wrong people.

Good luck and may ur child be healthy (thats all that matters) :)

Answer 8

First try not to stress out right now..thats not good for your baby...I know its easy to say and harder to do.....

2nd...talk with your husband about how you will teach your child about his culture..from both of you...sounds like a lucky kid by the way! Having strong family connections is essential to keeping kids and teens away from drugs and gangs and so on...most of the statistics say that too.

3rd..I hate to say this actually..but I would consider moving to a quieter area....Crime happens anywhere but..it is your choice as a parent where you raise your child. If you live in NYC or the surrounding area or any other huge city, your child will be exposed to more at an earlier age. But if you stay,

I think you just have to give your kids "healthier options" and help them understand why they should be proud of their family and culture and how important they are to the family... most kids who get into drugs and crime are bored or unhappy with thier life in some way.

Best Wishes and Mabruk

Answer 9

ill try to make this short and simple haha. well i am not a parent, but ive practically been living in america my whole life. if you teach your kids well, guide them, and be their for them no matter what they will be good kids and make good choices. my parents raised me right, i don't drink, do drugs, hang with the wrong, and etc. im 16 btw. im sure youll be a great mother.

good luck.