Rape: Is it a big deal or is it those Evil Feminists spreading Lies Again?

Question

I was arguing with a guy online last night. His "argument" was that since women are frigid and our society views s*x as a big deal, that rape therefore becomes a crime. He said that if we stop listening to the "feminazis" and if women stopped making s*x into such a big thing, that rape would become a crime comparable to stealing a handbag.

My question to you is: Why is rape immoral/unethical? If women stopped putting so much thought into s*x, would rape still be a big deal? Or is just those evil feminists spreading fear to try to take over the world?...Or does this guy sound like a rape apologist?

(Note, I completely disagree with this guy, but I would like to see if anyone agrees with him and what their reasoning is.)

Answer 1

Well, first of all, I do not think that the women of today are "frigid" or that society treats s*x as a big deal. Our culture is at a point now where sexuality of all sorts is generally thought of as okay and in some cases even celebrated.

Anyway, to answer your question, rape is immoral because it is an invasion of personal boundaries. We as human beings have the right to decide who we have sexual relations with. It is wrong when that right is violated, whether you are a female or male.

Answer 2

Rape is a big deal and maybe some day karma will grace that man with that knowledge.  It not only harms the victim but everyone the victim then comes into contact with.

Answer 3

1)   i don't agree with anything he said.

i would like to point out that rape was a big deal five hundred years  ago - when there were no feminists.   there have been many times in history when raping a man's wife or daughter was a killing offense.  no feminists there , either.

your friend is weak on history, and seems to credit feminists with amazing powers, far beyond those of mortal women.    You may be a little weak in those areas to, to listen to such poor assertions.

Answer 4

why in the name of all that is holy would that guy think forcing s*x onto someone violently is ethical?!!!!!?!?! he just wants to be able to have his way with women and have them not say anything...men are such narcissists!! they think they are so muh better than women and i cant stand it!

Answer 5

idk... i mean if they are punching you and calling you s**t, meat sack all that stuff ummm yeah.. not good.

and then theres kids. some dont even know what it is until they grow up and then rape enters the everyday mind and you're like "oh  ****, thats what it was" ....

Answer 6

Honestly....I have a few choice words to describe that guy but I won't say them. What a jerk. Seriously, I would not be surprised if that guy ever rapes a woman. Major sociopath.

Rape is a crime because my body belongs to ME, not to some stranger who wants to jump me. Unless I am willingly participating in the s*x (and that won't be the case if you ain't my husband), then you are taking it from me against my will. That is wrong, and it's so much worse than stealing a handbag. I and my body are more valuable than a handbag - the same can be said of each of us!

Answer 7

He said, "That rape would become a crime comparable to stealing a handbag."

He's looking for excuses, which leads to to wonder how many women, violently or not, he has already raped; something tells me quite a few.  What I also believe is those women never reported him. So, to him they don't report, they "loved" his services.  <shivers>

Answer 8

Rape is not about s*x. It's about someone having more control over your body than you. Even when you're having consensual s*x with someone, you have the power to stop whenever you feel like it. Rape takes that power away. This guy definitely sounds like a rape apologist. Does he call himself axn?

EDIT: If a man gets a woman drunk purposely so she will be unable to give informed consent to s*x, it's a withdrawal of power of a sexual nature over one's body; therefore, rape.

Answer 9

He is a rape apologists.  While there is some damage done to the psyche of a woman because society pressures them to be virgins, and pure - not the feminists - rape is an assault, and it is a life changing experience.  A person holds you down, and puts something foreign inside your body and leaves a foreign bodily fluid in your body.  What could be more offensive?  I would ask the man if he is willing ot go to prison and be raped himself, and then come back and revisit his opinion.  However, unless he is a homosexual male, rape is not as damaging to men as it is to heterosexual women, because those women have to then submit to having the same offensive act done to them through love, and it is almost impossible to rid your mind of the horrors of rape, while having real voluntary s*x with a loving partner.

Answer 10

I would compare a rape to a guy getting seven bells beaten out of him or getting stabed but I don't know, I'm not a woman. Horrible crime whatever way you look at it.

Modern definitions make us all both victims and rapists, and false stats like one in four make a mockery out of the real victims,  people are now suspicious of any information relating to rape.

A false accusation is as serious as a genuine rape IMO.

Answer 11

Rape is a serious crime, but..

Rape has been greatly over-exaggerated by feminists and their false statistic(1 in 4).  The definition of rape has also continues to become ever expanding to the point of being ridiculous; this make it very easy for women to falsely accused men of rape. What worse is that the false accusers often get no more than a "slap on the wrist" for ruin an innocent man life.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,1940...

Answer 12

Of course it is a big deal, and any man who attempts to trivialize rape would undoubtedly change his mind if it happened to him or his daughter.  

Answer 13

Because rape would lead to babies which would become a huge physical, financial and yes emotional burden on the women would would be forced to carry them

You would spread STDs

Not to mention that s*x itself can hurt women if done too forceful

Rape violates a autonomy, namely a persons right to do as they wish

It is assault

If a women choose to fight back then things could escalate into a deadly altercation

Answer 14

What's wrong with the guy who asked you that question?

Anyway, rape isn't usually about s*x. It's about control.

And rape was a big deal even before the concept of feminism. It's always been thought of as a big crime, at least by "real men." (Definition of real men: men who don't think it's okay to rape women)

And how could he not think it's traumatic? Women who are raped go through a lot. Gosh, this guy needs to watch some Law and Order: SVU!

Rape is wrong because it severely harms a woman both physically and emotionally. Not to mention, you can't just rape people, it's not your body. Gosh, this guy...I think if he said this to someone in person he would get beat up. Or at least I hope so.

EDIT: And women are definitely NOT frigid. He probably thinks that just because he can't get a woman to let him near her.

Answer 15

tell your " friend" to go dunk his head in acid.

Answer 16

I would say that guy doesn't sound like a rape apologist...he sounds like a rapist...and I guess to some extent makes light of it because he is guilty of it. I think anybody who dismisses rape in such a callous way lacks empathy on a sociopathic level. One of the major signs of a socipathic/psychopathic personality is extreme lack of empathy.

I, like you, wonder if he would equate someone shoving something up his @$$ repeatedly until he screamed in utter pain, to having his wallet stolen.  But, like some men (I see the evidence for this here all the time), I'm sure he thinks it's nothing he'll ever have to worry about, so to him it's a non-issue.

EDIT@"Iblockidiots"--The reason that false rape accusations statistics do not include accused persons who were then found innocent is because that scenario does not necessitate a "false" accusation. If it was a case of stranger rape, then the victim may not have seen the attacker, and the cops could have arrested the wrong guy, OR a guilty man may occasionally go free. I'm sure it happens.

Answer 17

No one, male or female, can possibly understand the shock the trauma and the lifelong consequences in dealing with such a horror. The only thing comparable for men is to go to federal prison and be raped by gangs of other men. Rape is an event that never goes away, is always with you and pretty much affects you for the rest of your life; again, if you have no personal experience, then there is no way you can even begin to understand how it affects you. Sophistries and platitudes aside, it is physically and emotionally devastating and should never be trivialized in any way, e.g., being compared to having a purse stolen. Having personal experience with BOTH, let me hasten to assure you the rape was a far more egregious and traumatic event.

Answer 18

As a person who has been through this, it angers me that this is so trivialized and brushed aside as it being the woman's fault. Who asks to be forced into s*x with someone who says they will hurt them or worse if they don't comply? Who asks to be robbed after?

The sad fact is that there are some crazies out there. It's funny how people have such a problem with pedophiles but not a problem with someone getting raped within the same age bracket as the perpetrator. If the s*x was forced, it's not consent - therefore it is rape.

What is even sadder is that most of us don't want to go through the legal process. I actually did that, and they didn't catch the guy until they tested his DNA 9 years later.

I wound up not wanting to give yet another statement because I was trying to move on. They prosecuted him without me.

It is common, it is evil, and it's under-reported. Those who really have really gone through this hate going through the legal system, because we're treated like we deserved this for some reason. It's awful, it's humiliating and it's illegal. For people to discount this awful act of violence in any form (men or women) but to be appalled that it happens to children is sad. It's the same thing, only an age difference.

Answer 19

Originata:

"Stats show that the most common form of rape is by acquaintance, meaning that a woman is most likely to know her rapist."

That doesn't mean that it has nothing to do with power.  I highly doubt that most rapists are just horny.

"I don't blame the fact that women getting raped is their own faults but many women do not respect the danger that men pose. "

I didn't know that men were pit bulls.  Men are HUMAN with FEELINGS.  I guess I'm supposed to look at every man as a potential rapist. What a sad commentary.

"As a man, I always tell any female I care about to stop looking at men as if we are candy and they are in some candy shop"

Really, you've been watching too much "s*x and the City".  Women (usually) aren't the ones screaming lewd comments at men on the streets.  The scenario you described usually happens to women (by men).

"The fact of the matter is that most rapists are men, so you must take as much precaution as possible (though I know nothing is a guarantee)."

Again, A: You're making it seem like every man is a potential rapist, and B: you're making it the woman's fault.  "Well, yes, you were raped, but you should've known better than to trust a MAN".  Get real.  Maybe men should be taught about rape at a young age.  Maybe they should be taught that if a woman says 'no', it's just 'no' (and if she's one of those 'no' means 'yes' women, she's an idiot anyway).  Yes, women should be careful when going out, but I don't agree with the idea that men are these big scary monsters that women should be afraid of.  

" believe feminism has played its part in this by fooling women into believing that they can behave as men. Women are deluded into thinking that they can view s*x the same way as men do."

A: When has feminism ever said that women should be like men?  I didn't realize that strength, intellect and inner (and outer) strength were qualities solely attributed to men.  Give me a break.

B: And how do ALL men view s*x?   Do men view s*x in the same way?  Do YOU speak for all men?  Puhlease.

Answer 20

To the person being violated, rape is a VERY BIG DEAL, indeed.

<wow, a thumb down.... I hope that person gets psychological help....I really, really do>

Answer 21

This is a sick argument. You people need to go to a better school.  

Answer 22

Of course it's a big deal. That guy is just an idiot.

Answer 23

The guy you had this discussion with is a complete moron. But please, forget this argument about rape being about control, power, etc. It has been repeated by feminists so much that it has become a cliche, and is not completely truthful.

Regardless of why a man rapes, it is wrong. Stats show that the most common form of rape is by acquaintance, meaning that a woman is most likely to know her rapist. I don't blame the fact that women getting raped is their own faults but many women do not respect the danger that men pose. As a man, I always tell any female I care about to stop looking at men as if we are candy and they are in some candy shop. The fact of the matter is that most rapists are men, so you must take as much precaution as possible (though I know nothing is a guarantee).

I believe feminism has played its part in this by fooling women into believing that they can behave as men. Women are deluded into thinking that they can view s*x the same way as men do.

Answer 24

1. I don't believe you had this discussion with anyone but yourself.

2. Rape is a big deal.

3. Rape should not be seen as a 'male against female' issue. Men rape men, women rape women.

4. FBI stats concerning false accusations are only collected if the accuser recanted her accusation and admitted she was lying. They do NOT include accusations in which the alleged rapist was proven innocent or when prosecutors found no grounds to take the accusation to trial.

Answer 25

His "argument" is too ridiculous to waste brain power even dignifying with a response.

But ask him...isn't it a "coincidence" that women are only "frigid" when they have s*x with him?

Edit: You can't argue with idiots like that. Don't even try. You'll just upset yourself.