Registering for wedding gifts?

Question

My fiance and I are getting married next summer. We have been together for 8 years, and have been living together for the last 7 years. We own our house and have it plenty full of "stuff" already. I feel uncomfortable registering for wedding gifts because I feel we already have mostly everything we need. I know there are all types of registeries with various themes, but I can't get over the feeling of telling people what we want to recieve. Is it tacky to register for your wedding when you've been together this long? I feel like it looks greedy.

Answer 1

Well you may have a lot of stuff already, but is there anything that you wish you had a newer version of or stuff that matches?

I also live with my fiance but I registered for matching plates, cups, silverware, etc. that way we could start new, and I am going to yard sale/donate our old stuff.

I also wanted stuff that was ours instead of mine or his.

Answer 2

If you don't create some kind of registry you are going to be bombrded with calls asking what you want.  It's like making a christmas list.  You don't expect people to buy everything on there but this is what your wish list is.  I know what you mean though, I feel a little awekward about the whole thing to.

It doesn't look tacky or greedy it just gives people the option.  In your situation most people will probably just give cash.  But register for some stuff you've always wanted but can't afford, maybe some nice flatware, a punch bowl, serving tray etc etc.  

At one time it was almost tacky to register but now people expect it and will be calling you asking where you are registered and if you aren't they will ask what you want constantly.  This is also a way to prevent yourself from endind up with 4 blenders and 6 toasters. lol.  When people ask you can always say "well we are registered here but we'd really rather not receive gifts".

OR if people really insists ask them to make a donation to a charity you and your fiance have chosen, in your name.  That might be nice, definately NOT greedy.  no one with half a brain could say you asking to help a charity is greedy. lol

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Good luck and Congrats on finally bagging him. lol (don't worry I've been with mine forever too, and finally getting him down the isle next year)

Answer 3

I think you are better to just not register at all and if people ask what you want them tell them yu bascially have everything you need.  This is what my husband and I did.  We ended up mostly with money and a few gifts that we appreciated and put to good use.  I think its just kind fo dumb to register if you don't really need anything because then people are spending money on things you could do without and I don't like the idea of people registering for things like video games and home gym equipment (yeah...seen it done plenty of times)  If thats what people so choose to spend the money on then thats fine, but coming right out and asking for it just isnt right.  just let friends and close family know you dont really need anything and they can spread it word of mouth to others and hopefully you can get some cash to buy what you want.

Answer 4

I also did not want to register for gifts for the same reasons that you mention. We are not living together, but each of us have our own homes and basically don't need anything. However, as soon as the invitations went out, we started getting calls asking where we were registered. So, we decided that we needed to register a few things to give people ideas. Not everyone wants to give money or gift cards.

We finally decided that some new bath towels, or bed linens would be nice. Also, matching dishes, glasses or silverware.

I still feel weird about it, but people continue to ask, because they want to give you a gift to celebrate your wedding.

Answer 5

I feel the same way, other than a few upgrades of items my significant other and I already have, there's not much I need.

However, you have to think of your guests.  Many would prefer to buy you items rather than give you money.  You have to make a registry or two for those type of people.  There's almost always some kind of new fun gadgets at bed bath & beyond you'd probably like to have... or upgrade your current towels, something like that.  Just have fun with it.

Answer 6

NOT TACKY AT ALL....YOU REGISTER FOR WHAT YOU WANT. YOU MAY HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR SO LONG BUT MARRIAGE IS A WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF BEING TOGETHER SO GET ALL THAT YOU CAN! PLUS MOST PEOPLE GIVE YOU GIFT CARDS TO THE PLACES YOU REGISTER SO YOU CAN USE THEM FOR WHATEVER! I'M GETTING MARRIED IN SEPTEMBER AND WE REGISTERED AT TARGET, WALMART, AND LINENS-N-THINGS AND WE HAVE A TON OF GIFT CARDS FROM WALMART AND TARGET THAT WE CAN USE FOR WHATEVER WE MAY NEED AFTER THE WEDDING!  BEST WISHES!!! ♥♥

Answer 7

A registry is something helpful for guests. Most will appreciate it and not look at it that way. I've been married for 10 years and have a lot of things but I could still use new towels, new plates, new comforter, a new camera etc. Register at Target or someplace where there is more than just bed, bath and kitchen things.  

Answer 8

You have to make some sort of list.  What will people bring to your bridal shower?  Tons of stuff you don't like or can't use.  Take a close look around your home.  Maybe you would like a new sheet set or some new towels?  Maybe there's some favorite store like Bed, Bath & Beyond that you like to shop at - they could get you gift cards you could spend whenever you need something.

You can also register for your honeymoon.  Check with your travel agent.  If you don't have a travel agent, you could have your bridal party discreetly pass the word around.

Good luck!

Answer 9

Everyone registers, even people who are getting married the second time and have kids register! Registering isn't tacky, it's a common practice, believe me. All you need to register for is the basics, like towels, sheets, table linens. The kinds of things you can always refresh. Don't feel bad if you need a new blender, to register for it. You can always do presentation preferred at your wedding, but have your registry for those who want to purchase you gifts and for your wedding showers. You deserve gifts, as much as the people who are starting off fresh deserve gifts.

Answer 10

I registered for my wedding and my husband and I had lived together for 7 1/2 years before marriage and still we only received maybe 3-4 items on our registry so people that know you will do what they feel best. But the registry is more for those people that are family but don't know you day to day

Answer 11

It's not tacky, but you are also not required to register. If you feel you don't need anything then don't register. However, you can register for some upgrades of things you might need (new sheets, towels, etc.).

Answer 12

Easy solution: "no gifts, please."

But it's not tacky to register - just do it quietly, and give out the info on a "need to know" basis.  Your not having a registry won't stop determined guests from giving gifts; it will just cause them to get you stuff that you might not necessarily want or can't return.

Answer 13

You don't HAVE to register at all. If you don't feel the need or don't want to, don't. Most people will just give you money but be prepared for a few gift you may not have expected. People may ask but just tell them you are not registering but thank you for the thought. My bro and SiL didn't register because like you, they have a house and all the bells and whistles necessary to run it. They simply didn't register and no one seemed to find that out of the ordinary. From what I understand they recieved a lot more personal, meaningful gifts than household items and they also got some cash as usual. A lot of the gifts they recieved were personalized or unique to their tastes which was really great!

Good luck!

Answer 14

It is not tacky at all, it is almost expected.  Your telling me you need no new plates or appliances or bath stuff or sheets or luggage.  All your stuff is how you would like it to be (new and matching, etc)?  You have a formal set of china and glasses?  You can use this as an opportunity to get nicer stuff or stuff you have always wanted but couldn't get (like that nice kitchen aid mixer everyone loves).  When my cousin got married, she had a house for a number of years with a lot of stuff in it already.  She registered for all matching things and a new bedroom set and stuff like that, then gave all of her old stuff away to younger cousins and sibling or the salvation army.

People want to buy you some nice things.  Have a small registry and then when it is filled, people will give gift cards or money.  Try Bed, Bath & Beyond because people can use those 20% off coupons and they have tons of choices for everything!  Hope this helps

Answer 15

When we got married we registered for our honeymoon. On these sites people purchase different things for you like a horseback ride, romantic dinner for two, first class upgrades or couples massages; whatever you choose. It allowed people to purchase FUN things for us that we would use on our Honeymoon and remember forever.

The way it works is that a person purchases something from the registry and when they pay, they pay a small fee (just a couple dollars). The fee is how the registry site makes money and is much less than if someone was purchasing a gift from a department store online because there are no tax or shipping charges.

This is kind of confusing to explain, so let me give you an example. If you registered for a couples horseback ride and the cost was $70, you don't receive a certificate in the mail for a free horseback ride. The cost of the horseback ride ($70) goes into your registry account. Then you can choose when and how often the money in the registry account goes into your checking account (or you can have a check sent to you). When we did this registry, we opened a second checking account through WAMU (cause it was free) just for the registry. That way, anything people bought us would be seperate from our regular expenses and wouldn't get spent. When we went on our honeymoon, we then used our Visa checkcards from our WAMU to pay for things on our honeymoon. Someone bought us seat upgrades on our flight, so when we got to the gate to check in; we used our WAMU checkcard to pay for our upgrades. Someone bought us a couples massage so when we booked our couples massage, we used our WAMU card to pay.

It was great because our guests were happy because we had a registry (some people just PREFER to have a registry to choose from), PLUS we got to do all these extra wonderful things and have all these great memories on our honeymoon that our friends and family made possible.