A question about adopting a child?

Question

Here is a question, that i'm curious about. I know that they judge you, they are very strict on who gets to adopt children and who don't.....I Know that its like $20,000 dollars straight up to adopt a kid, or at least that is what I heard. I also know that they would rather have you have a husband/wife to adopt. Sometimes if you are rich, it doesn't matter.

On to my question, what do you think are the things that they judge you?

Like lets say you become an author of books one day....do you think that they will judge on the type of stories you write? Like angsty? Graphic s*x? kidnapping? Just because I write that kind of stuff..does not mean i'm into that stuff in real life. I just tend to write sad stories about rape and kidnapping, or bloody vampires, and most of my stuff has gayness in it and LOTS of s**t...descriptive s**t.

I don't have anything finished yet, i'm just really curious. I dont think that is fare, that someone would judge you, not being able to adopt a kid, for that.

Answer 1

We had our homestudy done in CA,so maybe things are different, but they are really not that picky. They just want you to be a normal, stable person. They want  to make sure you can provide a safe environment for a child. They don't care about married/single/straight... I doubt very much they want to read your books before you're approved to adopt, unless you're a pornographer or something I don't see a problem.



In terms of preference  for married, the birthmom picks the parents, so it would be her preference. There is not one giant "They" who decides your fate. For example your homestudy may approve you to adopt, but a potential birthmom may look at what you've written and decide she doesn't like you. Or she may decide you're really cool. Who knows.

Answer 2

Let's face it...it's a cruel world.  Every one judges you on their own basis.

Answer 3

i think they will look at if u can take care of the child and give it the love and nurtureing it needs more than what kind of books u  write...

Answer 4

If you're adopting through foster care (which is where the most need is, and it's free in most states), I doubt they would consider your writing to be a reason not to adopt.  Also, you don't have to be married (although I'd advise it for the benefit of the child, just so that you can have enough time to spend with your child - adopted kids need lots of one-on-one time with their parents).  You also don't have to be rich (you just need to be able to pay bills).  The only time the subject of your writing might even come up would be for you to explain how it relates to your real life (i.e. the way you live your life is not reflected in your writing).  I have a very non-mainstream religion that can be easily misconstrued, and there are quite a few misconceptions about it, so that was the focus of quite a bit of attention during the homestudy process.  But the reason they did that was not to judge me, but to make sure that they explained it in such a way that the people reading our homestudy would get a good picture of my religion, so that THEY wouldn't judge me harshly.  All they have to go on is a piece of paper, so they want to make sure that piece of paper is as descriptive as possible.

It can be really hard for the caseworkers to make their decisions based just on the homestudy, but really, it's not that hard.  If you're a generally good person, and if you know what you're getting into, you shouldn't have any problem.  If they ask you a lot of questions, it will be because they're on your side, and want to make sure that your personality comes across well in your homestudy.

Answer 5

You must have enough money for the child and they check to see if you are a good enough provider. Can you feed your child, care for you child, love your child? Are you an alchoholic, a drug abuser, a serial killer, a convict? They just look to make sure you're a good person and they won't do a huge and in depth search on your writings and thoughts.

They want good parents, not perfect persons.

Answer 6

Smart writers use pen names....and may use more then one depending on what they write. My published writing is Not under my real name--neither is Stephen Kings....

Pen Names are often used by writers who want to write in different places--some writers use many different pen names...

Writers who keep a lot of "writing" around--especially FICTION either on the computer--or in notebooks should ALWAYS make it a habit to Lable each Page as "Fiction" if it is fiction.... This way if you die and someone finds the words they know--it was fiction....

As a writer if you are a real writer--then it is easy to tell during a home study. Being a Writer is a career for many people and unless you are completely STRANGE you don't have to appear to be what you write about--especially if it is Fiction.

During our adoption home study the specific content of my writing wasn't an issue.

One last note: It doesn't cost anything to adopt children from Foster Care.

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Answer 7

the basic criteria is do you have money to pay for a child, a home for the child, etc.

Answer 8

I adopted a healthy newborn, as a single parent although I've been happily engaged for 4 years, with no intentions of getting married (if I did, I couldn't afford to adopt a child-I was widowed years ago).  Anyway, they did a home study to make sure I am able to give my son a proper home, and except for having my son's first mom live with me for 3 1/2 months before he was born (I'm lucky, she was a gracious, very much NOT greedy person as far as money and things go), the adoption costs less than $1000.00 including home study, lawyer fees, paperwork, and filing fees.  If you are blessed like I was to find a woman who is pregnant and wanting to give the child a different home, adoption is easy.  The hard part is so many women change their minds, and some move in with people for a temporary place to stay.  I was very lucky! and I am so blessed to have such a wonderful, beautiful, intelligent, healthy son!

Answer 9

I wonder how the kid would feel having a graphic s**t author for a mother...or how much the other kids would tease him or her...

I shudder to think about it.