A scenario for you to ponder?

Question

ok here we go a 2 and a half year old child at centre of an access row,

Parent 1, has never been on time once to pick up or drop the child off has consistently failed to keep to pre-arranged dates and times because their friends and social life is more important than their childs relationship with the other parent.when with parent 2 child is fed chinese fried rice and curry or microwave sausages and sometimes chicken but nothing else Parent has also been investigated 3 times by social services who still monitor them when child is there . parent refuses to answer phone calls for days on end to arrange contact then expects for contact to be arranged at drop of a hat when it suits them, Parent was also criticised heavily by social services for making the child wait in a car for 2 hours with parent number 2 with no change of clothes way past the childs bedtime because they were busy having s*x in a car and knowing that that the child could not be taken to parent number 2's house as it was being renovated and there was no power parent number 1 believes this is ok as they only did it once, Parent 1 regularly takes child to known drug dealers house which is well known to police and has drugs lying around on the floor, Parent 1 screams harassment when parent 2 questions their behaviour over treatment of the child and their actions around the child and phones the police trying to get parent 2 in to trouble.When with parent 1 child is left with anyone who will take the child or is left to their own devices to play whilst parent spends all day on facebook and there phone.

now Parent 2.

Has been ready and on time for every agreed date for access, has never changed the arrangements once, social services have stated that parent 2 provides a stable safe enviroment for the child, Parent 2 has no criminal record, no history of violence and has always put the child first, the child is taken places such as swimming softplay and interacts with other children when taken to nursery when parent 1 comes to pick child up the child clearly does not want to go.Parent 2 has dedicated a lot of time and money trying to keep the relationship amicable and civil for the sake of the child and parent 2 believes that the child benefits from having both parents in their life. Please also bear in mind that the courts are fully aware of both parents actions where witnesses have spoken regarding the actions above

In your opinion who do you believe is the better parent? Would it surprise you if i told you that even though parent 2 had evidence to back up their claims inc witnesses one of them being parent 1s mother the courts have decided that parent 1 is the better parent, Parent 2 is now only allowed supervised access on a date convenient to parent 1 because parent 1 says they fear parent 2 will not allow them to have access to the child they state this with absolutley no evidence to back up their claims that parent 2 would refuse access or take the child away.

And the reason for the courts decision is Parent 1 is female.

Surely if this case does not show that family law needs to be changed what will?

Answer 1

This brought tears to my eye's.  It is clearly wrong.  The courts have always favoured women in custody, access and divorce.  

Kat is right about the fathers for Justice.  It is well passed the time for the rules to be changed, or even judges to wake up and realise what century they live in.  

Keep fighting.  XX.

Answer 2

Don't ever try and write a book!

Answer 3

Children have been put into the care for less.  Poor kid!

Answer 4

Parent 2 would be my first thought as the better parent. There's something not right if the courts ruled in favour of parent 1.

Answer 5

They sound as bad as one another! They need to act like adults,or the child will be screwed for ever.Went through a bit of this myself as a child.

Answer 6

I think it's time for Parent 2 to put Parent 1 six feet under.    As a kid, I had a truly awful custodial parent and would have given anything to see that scenario unfold.

Answer 7

There is only one solution to this problem, apply for sole custody through the courts.

The process will involve reports from social services on both of the parents and the child.

Enquiries are made into the current and past situations of each parent including friends, acquaintances etc. also into the medical backgrounds of each parent to substantiate a claim for suitability as guardian.

Answer 8

another example of peoples' lives being dictated by a system that tries to encompass all situations with one rule.. when there are more than enough resources to make an informed, individual decision.

But no, for some reason the system has too much control, and the workers involved didn't have enough power to make the decision. Either that or some idiotic judge just couldnt be bothered to listen

Answer 9

I didn't even read it to see that someone is very bitter! It's always the child that gets screwed in these situations.At least he's got two parents.Make love, not hate.

Answer 10

I think it's clear for all that Parent 2 (the father) is a better, more stable and more appropriate parent in this situation. The court is geared towards women, which at the time of making it that way seemed appropriate, it needs to be updated to take into account the good that single DADS can do too.

And people wonder why there are men dressed as batman on top of Westminster.

EDIT: How exactly does the above answer merit a thumbs down? Grow up!

Answer 11

I'd say there's far more to the story than just that

I'm fully aware courts often go in favour of the mother when the father would be clearer a better parent

But in this case for the mother to be investigated numerous times by social services and the courts still rule in her favour I'd say somethings not quite right there

Parent 2 would obviously be the better choice here