Annoying neighbors or angry mother?

Question

My son (2 years old) is having developmental problems, the therapist helping him with his delays suggested that I need to make sure that he is really active during the day so that his sensory needs are met and he is able to learn how to speak better. I've been trying to take him to places everyday this week not to bother the neighbors. I live in an apartment building on the top floor. Today I was not able to take him anywhere because I was emotionally drained from worrying about my son. I settled for playing with him in my apartment and was playing a running game to fulfill his sensory needs. Not ten minutes went by before the neighbor came knocking and complaining about the noise. I explained what was going on with my son and he didn't care at all, all he said was "I can hear every little foot set". When he left I broke down, I want the best for my son and some days I can't take him to places. It was only 4 in the afternoon. Am I just being a bi*** or is my neighbor a jerk???

Answer 1

I don't think you are out of line at all. There is a thing called right to peaceful habitation. That means both of you have this right. Unless this is an ongoing problem he has no room to complain. You have definitely shown more consideration than the law requires you to. I would simply tell him that there are some days that there will be noise, that you try to be considerate of his peace but that you have a two year old. Kids that age are loud and rambunctious. That you do your best to control the noise, but you can not simply stick your child on the couch and expect him to stay there and be quiet because this guy doesn't want to be 'bothered'. My neighbors downstairs just moved out and we had an agreement that my son who just turned three would not run or jump around after 7 pm. They understood that he is a child and cannot be put on a leash. I just hope that whoever moves in next will be as understanding seeing as we are having another child in a few weeks. Just stand your ground and don't let him make you feel bad. We are all human!

Answer 2

what an a*****e. Don't expect him to understand when he doesn't have any kids himself. Just pretend he doesn't exist. You're not breaking any noise ordinances or making noise to be obnoxious so he needs to just deal with it. That's part of living in an apartment complex-dealing with other people's noises. I myself live beneath a young couple still in college party mode. When they first moved in I explained to them in the coolest way i possibly could that in our building sounds were amplified and suggested it would be cool if they could consider rugs, carpeting, keeping their shoes off and warning me of any big parties they might throw since at the time my kids were like 9 months and 2 and had 8 pm bedtimes. I never said don't party I just asked to know when they'd be loud so I could prepare myself. They acted like "oh yeah. No problem" to my face and low and behold that same weekend, without saying a word although they ran into me a few times, had their friends over, got really drunk and even wrestled until 4 am when i went and told them to shut the **** up. Some people have no concept of consideration. People need to be more understanding of each others situations. If this guy can't be considerate of your situation why should you consider his lonely and obviously depressed life? Like my neighbor's he sounds like an immature, disrespectful ***. Why can't we be neighbors?

Answer 3

NO WAY MAMA!!! You're fine your neighbor is just an a$$!!!!!! Your little boy NEEDS the activity and it was only 4...if neighbor called the cops they would tell him that there is nothing they can do cause you are doing nothing wrong!!! Try to calm down and do the best you can with your son...it is all anyone can ask of you. As long as you are doing your best he will be just fine. I know how you feel though, I have a 21 month old who has NO vocabulary and the earliest appointment I can get her with a speech therapist isn't for 4 months!!!! It is hard and frustrating! keep your head up!!!

Answer 4

We currently live on the third floor of a condo building. We've found the wearing crocks in the house helps reduce the noise our neighbors hear.

You can get your son some crocks, slippers or a pair of soft soled shoes to wear, when you are doing his therapy.

The most important thing is to keep up with his therapy. It will help you son for his entire life. You are building the foundation for his life. Don't let a nasty neighbor, stop you from caring for your son to the best of your ability.

Another thought, is to ask your therapist if there are quiet activities you could do from time to time. - Like finger painting with pudding or jello. Body painting is messy but fun. - paint his feet and let him walk on paper. - this activity is usually quiet because the child is watching his feet to see what happens.

Your therapist should be able to give you some suggestions, that will benefit your son.

Answer 5

its your neighbor he is a jerk

Answer 6

your neighbor is a stupid ***-hat tell him you can hear him crying because hes such a bitter old f**t just ignore him, or next time he comes by just say, you know what i heard that to, but it wasnt from my apartment

Answer 7

did it occur to you perhaps he has a reason for his behavior? perhaps he works nights and sleeps during the day for instance... now i AM a mother and i love my son but i think everyone here needs to start realizing that the world does NOT revolve around our children, others have lives and rights and expectations of their own

Answer 8

Your neighbor is a jerk. I think you should be allowed to play with your son. I mean, if your kid is crying in the middle of the night, is he going to come knocking on your door telling you to shut him up? He moved into an apartment building so he knows there is going to be some sound transfer...and if it's 4 in the afternoon...and he's home..tell him to get a job and leave you alone!!!

Answer 9

You are totally in the right.  I would not go out of my way to make noise with yelling or abnormally loud music, but walking and exercising (including, for a toddler, running) are normal daytime behaviors.  Tell her that you are sorry to have bothered her, but that's just the way life in an apartment building is.  Do your best to appear (and feel, if you can!) unbothered by your neighbor's unreasonable demands.  Continue to be pleasant when you see each other, putting on a cool, peaceful demeanor.  Repeat your mantra, "That's life in an apartment building."  You have the right to engage in normal behavior.

Answer 10

Maybe, you should consider getting moved to one of the first floor apartments. This is obviously going to be an ongoing thing.

Neither of you are exactly in the wrong. I know you are upset and want to help your son, but the people below you have a right to live in peace. What is he was working nights or had a baby that your child woke up? In his place, I would have been upset. At least he came to you and didn't just report you to the landlord.

There must be other alternatives to running to satisfy his sensor needs. What about a bath?