Anxiety...with baby..please help.?

Question

i have always had problems with anxiety and now i have a baby also. it really paralyzes me to do things i wish i could do. i feel like if i dont stick to my schedule, my way then i go crazy. i used to take meds bc of it, but i got off them before i was pregnant. i dont want to go back on them. i dont like to go anywhere on trips and my sisters baby shower is this weekend 4 hours away. my baby dosnt last longer than 20 minutes in the car before she gets cranky. shes almost 9 months. i used to tell myself i would be fine to take her places once she was on solid foods and not just breastfeeding bc she would be content longer and i could handle it better. but here i am shes on solids and im making other excuses. i am worried about everything going wrong and everything having to be done differently and not how im used to it. we would be staying there all weekend. i have 2 or 3 other long trips i have to take this year. i know i need to get her used to going places but i just hate it. does anyone else feel this way? what have you found that works. i try to tell myself it wont last forever its just for a short time. thanks for your advice ahead of time!

Answer 1

Even though you don't want to get back on meds for anxiety, please talk to your doctor about doing so and about your feelings. You may need counseling as well as medication.  If you suffered from anxiety before you had your baby, it's only going to get worse since you've had the baby.  You now not only have your own anxieties, but now have to deal with things regarding your child.  Many children actually are relaxed by riding in a car and your child may be sensing your anxiety.Good luck with this and congratulations on becoming a mom.

Answer 2

I was really bad with my first I was afraid to go anywhere with him because he might start crying and i was afraid he was sick or something alot then i talked to my doctor about this and she put me on meds lexapro and they seemed to help.  I now have a 3 1/2 year old and a 8 1/2 month old and I still get scared or have this over whelmed feeling sometimes but nothing like it was  I go where ever i want to now with both kids with out any problems.  But my ob put me on lexapro after my daughter was born because i had post pardom depression with my first but the best advice i can give is you might need to get back on your meds until the child is a little older and you can handle things a little better I know the feeling and it bits but there is help you just need to find it.  

Answer 3

I'm sorry for what you are going through, I have terrible anxiety as well and I won't go on a daily med either. There are 2 things I can think of aside from behavior modification. Does Xanax work for you? If it does, maybe you can just save it for the events you know will provoke a reaction. For me that would be too many people in a small house/room, like family get togethers. I would take one as a preventative measure and it helped a lot and I wouldn't have to do it very often. If you're breastfeeding, you might want to pump and dump when you take one. Maybe clonazepam would be safer and last longer, there are several in the benzodiazepene class to ask about at your doctor's. I'm also type II bi-polar and get away with not taking any mood stabilizers or anti-depressants with Chinese medicine. I go to acupuncture, but what helps me the most is the herbs I get there. The Dr gives me an herbal med called Liver Qi Pacifier and for me it has worked better than any traditional psych med ever has. No anxiety with it as well. Unfortunately you can't take it while pregnant, so I'm not sure about breastfeeding either. It's worth going to an experienced acupuncturist though. Mine was also an MD in China for 30 years before coming to this country and is a wealth of knowledge. Of course I have to mention counseling for anxiety, but it's never really helped me out in that department. I hope you find something that works for you. Good luck.

Answer 4

Have you spoke to you DR about any of this ? There are drugs you can take whilst your breast feeding and with BubCETCI know how you feel with the car situation my little miss was EXACTLY the same no car ride goes with out a screaming match, I have found letting her finish her tanty she will begin to realise that screaming in the car isn't going to get her what she wants, know she lasts at least 2 hours before her mood creeps in. Nothing will go wrong your life will change that i promise but you will adjust and in time things will seem normal again. I felt almost like you when i started as a mum now I couldn't imagine how life was without her.

Answer 5

Hi, usually kids fall asleep as soon as you drive. Are you sure she wont? Why don't you practice around your city? Take short trips..really short so she can get used to it. Make sure you show her that she's not the boss. Wear earphones or something so you can't hear her. Maybe you could try giving her a sucker at the end of a drive and somehow train her to think of it as a positive time. You've got time to figure this out. Good luck.

Answer 6

face your anxiety.  Go to the shower and you'll see it will all go OK.  That may help for the next time.  You have to force yourself to try to relax this time.  Then the next time it may get a bit easier.  Also, if this is a chronic thing that you've dealt with for a very long time would you consider talking to a counsellor that may be able to help you learn to deal with your anxiety? I understand that you don't want to be on meds so maybe try the counsellor thing. There are people that specialize in these kinds of things so they'd be able to give you specific tools to help.  It sounds like your anxiety is following you and maybe you have to try something you haven't tried before.  If all else fails, maybe you need to got back on the meds.  Do you really want to go through life feeling anxious about everything?  You've got to do what works to not let this take over your life.  Now is the time to just be enjoying your baby:)

good luck!