Boyfriend's Alcohol Problem? Help please?

Question

Okay so my boyfriend of over 3 yeas has a HUGE alcohol problem he has been hiding it from me but recently in the past few months i have notcied that this really is a problem, he drinks WAY to much, and i had a serious talk with him about it the other day and he said she would stop and he pured out all the alcohol he has because what i said got to him. But we were going to drink only a little on the weekends as he put it, we drank a little and i figured save the rest of the bottle for next weekend maybe 2 or 3 more weekends, then he told me he drank it all in one night. I am so mad and dissapointed in him and he will not let me talk to him about it anymore, and it is upsetting becasue he is going to hurt his body in the long run. So what should i do to help him solve this problem that he does not think is that big of a deal.

Answer 1

Leave him while you still can.

Do you have kids with him?  If the answer is "no", GET OUT before you do.  If you think he has a problem now, imagine what it would be like if you had a child to care for, PLUS had to deal with his alcoholism.

Answer 2

Dump him, he sounds lame.

Answer 3

First off, if he has an alcohol problem then you can not leave any alcohol in the house.  Secondly, by you drinking with him on the weekends is enabling him with his drinking problem.  He feels that it's ok and he doesn't have a problem because you're drinking with him.  If you feel that strongly that he has a problem then you can not drink with him...which means you can not drink.  He also has to admit to himself that he has a problem, until he does that there is nothing you can do to make him stop drinking.  I don't know the details of the conversation that you had with him, he may have told you that he does realize his drinking is a problem.  The reason why he may not want to talk to you about it anymore is that he feels guilty for drinking.  Just because he admits he has a problem, doesn't make it easy for him to not drink if it is in front of him.   The biggest thing you can do is to love him and support him.  You have to make the decision if he is the right one for you and if you want to stand by him through the roller coaster of a drinking problem.  I do have to say this though - if he is drinking and abusing you GET OUT!  If he just drinks too much and you are concerned for him, his health and safety then be there for him.  If he is really ready to stop drinking, then he will do it 100%...he will not tell you, I'll only drink on the weekends it will be ok...it won't stay just the weekends.  There are also pleanty of resources out there for him and for you to support him.  www.aa.org