Bride that needs help!?

Question

I am getting married next year and need some help. I have 5 people I would love to have in my wedding but wanted to try and narrow down to 2 or 3 people since its going to be a small simple wedding. This is really tough. HOw do I pick. Is 5 too many for a small wedding?

2 are sisters

1 is a best friend of 12 years

1 is a cousin who is like a best friend

1 would be my sister in law who i was in her wedding

Thanks for your help!!! It is needed.

Answer 1

5 is not too many for a small wedding I had 15 and it was a small wedding but if you had to narrow down to three people then I would go for your two sister and your sister in law. I'm sure the cousin and bf will be very understanding and you can invite them to your wedding so it's not like they won't be there with you. Best of luck on your special day!

Answer 2

You can have 5.  There's no rule that says you can't.  If these are the 5 closest people to you in your life, then have them all.

If you spouse to be can only come up with 3, that's fine.  A wedding is about the celebration of the people you love comeing together as a family.

Answer 3

one sis - MOH

one sis - MOC

sis in law - speech, candle lighter, verse reader....

cousin - speech, candle lighter, verse reader....

best friend, brides made.

I say the brides made for the friend of 12 years because she isnt family - she could have left your life at any time, and thats something to appreciate

Answer 4

5 is not a small wedding, especially when you consider that he'll have to come up with 5 people and then it'll be 10 total standing up for you.  But on that note, if you want 5 then darnit have 5.  It's your wedding!

Answer 5

go for 5

they pay for dress

you only have to

come up w/gifts day before

wedding for each

Answer 6

5 is not too many if you want them all in.  but if you really want to have 2-3 can you ask 2 of them to do readings during the ceremony? or find some other task for them?

Answer 7

I would start with my sisters, individually, and say I would like you to be in the wedding

Watch their reactions carefully if they both seem truly happy then stop there.

What party duties? If you are lucky your bridesmaids will be able to afford to throw you a shower, if they cannot another family member not Mom or FMIL should do it

Ladies being a brides is not an excuse to use relatives and friends as servants and expect them to spend all of their life savings to make your day special.

Answer 8

How many does your guy have? It would be better to be equal. If he can't come up with 5 then talk to them. They all seem very important to you but the soon to be sis in law...I think your just doing that to return the favor. If you really want to slim things down maybe cut her out of the party. You didn't hint at any importance including her aside from the fact that you were in her wedding. Another idea, ask your sisters if they wouldn't want to take part...you never know. bff's are bffs regardless of any blood connections. I'm sure they half expect to be offered a spot.

Answer 9

Five, it sounds like you can't really eliminate anyone , Just because you want a small and simple wedding you don't have to keep your wedding party down. Those people are your family and close friends, you really can't do with out anyone. Think of it this way . Who would be the least hurt it you didn't have them in the wedding? That is a tough one right? Good luck. And have Happy Day.!

Answer 10

they all seem very important to you.

i would just have the five.

if not you could do your sister and your cousin (immediate family)

Answer 11

If these 5 people are all equally important to you, use them.  If you have to narrow it down, sisters and sil... the best friend and cousin can have other jobs - readings, guest book, many other things that need to be done.  Be prepared for hurt feelings but sit down with them and explain that because of size, etc you felt you needed to use your families.  Let them know how much they mean to you, how much you need their support, and the things you need/want them to do.  Personally (until I became a wedding officiant) I never cared about standing up in the ceremony - there were so many behind the scenes things that needed done and that was my way of helping my friends.

I just performed a very small wedding w/3 attendants on each side - they expected only 40 guests max.

Congratulations and best wishes!

Answer 12

You can have 5 if you want- it's not unusual. They all sound close to you, it's not like you're just having 5 for the sake of it.

Does your fiance have 5 groomsmen? Not that he needs to as you can have more bridesmaids than groomsmen, but one suggestion for cutting down on the number of bridesmaids if you really want to would be to have his sister as a groomswoman (she stands with the groom and could either wear the same dress as the bridesmaids or wear a black dress of her choice).

As for the money issue- agree on a budget up front with the girls. Choose a dress that isn't too expensive. I have been in 3 weddings and all three brides have just told us to wear silver shoes (which all of the bridesmaids already had)- which saved a lot of money! Depending on your dress colour you could just tell them all to wear any dressy black or silver shoes that they already have. If you want them to have hair and make-up done, you could make this a part of your gift to them.

Answer 13

You know 5 really isn't all that many these days and its up to them if they want to be your attendants.  If you insist on only picking 3, you have to pick your sisters and sister-in-law.  They're family, you're friends will understand and you could have something else for them to be  involved in, but honestly-you're ok with 5--1 maid of honor and 4 bridesmaids-perfect!

Answer 14

They don't all have to be in the Bridal party - after all 10 is not a small wedding! Why not ask some of them to take on other roles? One could do a reading, another could lead the prayers....

Answer 15

The first thing you need to do is put yourself in all of your potential bridesmaid's shoes. Being a bridesmaid is a big responsibility, both financially and time-wise. If you are certain that any of your friends won't be able to handle the responsibility, then the answer is simple. There are always plenty of other essential roles when it comes to executing a wedding that dear friends can have the honor of fulfilling. So try to put yourself in their shoes, and if you aren't sure how they would feel about whether or not they are included in the bridal party, you may want to discuss it with each one individually so they understand your dilemma. You may let them know what a hard time you are having deciding how many people to have in your wedding, and that you want to keep things simple, but you don't want anyone to feel excluded. Then if you decide not to ask one to be in the wedding, make sure you do find some special way to include her in the festivities, letting her know how much you do value her friendship. However, there's nothing wrong with having 5 bridesmaids, even if the groom doesn't have 5 groomsmen. One word of caution though, you should never feel obligated to ask someone to be in your wedding just because you were in hers.