Confused after being molested ?

Question

When i was little i was repeatedly molested by my grandpa, i actually enjoyed it and sometimes wish had never stopped, what I'm confused about is most people i have asked say they are happy when it stops but I wasn't. another thing i''m confused about is my feelings toward my grandpa now, i have conflicting emotions, sometimes i hate him for it but at the same time love him. I'm confused about the hole thing to, like should i have told someone and should i now? another thing is he has had a stroke since then and has lost some of his memory and i don't know if he remembers ever doing anything to me.

maybe i just need someone to talk to about this idk, i just really don't want to be confused anymore

Answer 1

Pls don't bother other people commenting so ignorantly about the subject.

First of all, many victims who have been in a similar position as you have felt "normal" about their situation but are confused at the same time... predators/rapists/abusers often use techniques and mind games to make their victims feel "good" about their ordeal...which probably explains why abuse victims tend to stay with their abuser for a long time.

Now I don't know you personally, so I don't pretend to know all the answers for you. But based on what you have provided, it is understandable that you feel that way, but I think you don't want to stay as confused as you are presently. The best person that can help you dig in to your layers of emotions and put you in perspective, is a professional. You can start from there. Good luck and I hope you will get through this.

***edit***

kat_boi I did not say YOU posted ignorantly!! I meant OTHER people here are posting ignorant comments like calling you a troll or implying that you don't mean what you say. Please read my suggestions again. Why in the world would I call your post "ignorant". Thank you.

Answer 2

I know how you feel i was molested too by my cousins and one of them was a few years older than me and i was embarrassed because sometimes i did enjoy it but I heard its not crazy that your body reacts that way  but your not alone on that one and i read that when a child is molested by a person who is like an authority figure that they confused by it. I did eventually tell someone and talked about it and i did feel much better getting it off my chest so you should do the same cus it killed me for so many years not telling a soul about wat happened so i do suggest you say something and get help for it. I hate them for wat they did and i am messed up cus of them. Even if he did lose some memory im sure he still probly members some of wat he did to you. Its hard and confusing and know one should have to go through wat we did but sometimes lifes just f**ked up that way but it made me wat i am today and maybe its not such a good thing but o well. Just talk to someone you trust about it you will feel better afterwards

Answer 3

um wow. it might be best to go and see a therapist..

Answer 4

What you have consented to  do with your gf it totally an unnatural relationship. No girl/women would ever allow this to happen. So there is something wrong with your sexually. So you must consult a sexologist and/or psychologist for counselling. You should never do it again even your gf is bodily approach with such intention. I suggest you must not live in the house where your gf is living. Forget about him and never try to seem or think what happend with him.

Answer 5

1. you love your grandpa: very normal to do so

2. you are scared and confused: very normal again

3. you regret that your grandpa stopped molesting you, even though at your age now realize it is wrong and such contact should not have existed in your relationship with him. You don't want to hurt him now, especially if he doesn't remember and is in such health state.

4. you have to realize that you REALLY NEED COUNSELLING, to solve some issues from your childhood so you can have a normal relationship with your grandpa, understand some things, help you develop a healthy sexuality and a life without contradictions and dilemmas regarding basic things such as your relation with your family

5. getting help and talking to someone able to help and support you WILL NOT harm your grandpa. This is a whole different thing.

6. talk to your school therapist or any psychologist for counseling and therapy, confidentiality guaranteed  

Answer 6

, it makes sense that ud b confused and enjoyed what happened, it does after all feel good and as a child im sure u ddnt see that it was an inappropriate relationship..u need counseling

Answer 7

i think you are a troll...!!!

Answer 8

How old are you?

That's really sick, you probably are a very strong person who doesn't mind anything at all !