Did I do anything wrong here?

Question

I was supposed to help out with a concert last week. My parents were away so I was home alone and had to take care of our dogs. About two hours before I had to be at the concert, a huge thunderstorm started so I checked the weather network and it said it was going to be like that all day. I called my friend who works for the company that was putting on the show and told him I didn't think I could make it cause one of my dogs CANNOT be left alone when he's that scared. So I said I was going to wait for the storm to stop. About two hours after I was supposed to be at the show, it still hadn't stopped so I sent my friend a text message saying I couldn't make it and apologized. He told me not to volunteer with them again. I volunteered at a few of their concerts before with no problems, and this situation was completely beyond my control. Did I do anything wrong? Is there anything I should do so this doesn't hurt my relationship with my friend?

Answer 1

Putting on a show takes a lot of organization.   Jobs need to be assigned, timed right, and done properly, for it to be a success.

Since its voluntary, I think your reason was ok, its just that you said "maybe" I can make it later.

That creates a hassle.  

" Well, if she makes it, have her do this "  

You dont, so someone has to run around and find someone to fill the spot.  

They need to get jobs assigned so the show goes off right.  

They cant , at mid-show, be running finding people to cover for those who that didnt show, to do certain jobs.

Concerts ( generally) involve someone's livlihood, career or future career..  its important to them.

Im a dog person myself, so I totally understand why you did it.  

Its just one of those things, that you cant be 2 places at once.  You just should be more precise in what you intend to do.  

   Your friend should be understanding enough, or they probably arent much of a friend.

Answer 2

The dog cannot be left alone is kinda believable.  It's unbelievable that you don't have a plan for the dog when no one is home during a storm. He is probably thinking you are either making an excuse or you can't manage your pets.

Just apologize and ask for forgiveness.  Possibly explain how you have a process to manage your dog while away during a thunder storm.   Good luck making amends.

Answer 3

The thing is, even though your reason was probably a good one (I'm not a dog person so I wouldn't actually know) it doesn't change the fact that your friend was relying on you and you let him down. It's too bad you couldn't have found someone to stay with your dog, since you didn't want to leave it alone; then you could have gone to the concert as planned. As for your friend, I'm sure the situation he was left with was stressful, as he was now a person short with not very much notice. All you can do is apologise, and perhaps it will blow over in time.

Best Regards,

Holly

Answer 4

Is one of your dogs a lab? I had a black lab and they are known for being afraid of thunderstorms. So I completely understand that situation. I don't see where you did anything wrong, yes you put your friend in a bind because they were depending on you to show. But at least you let them know that you couldn't make it and that is better than not calling and not showing at all. It sounds like your friend is a bridge burner, and yes it sounds like it may have hurt your relationship.

Answer 5

Yes, you did something wrong.  You waited too long (2 hours after you were supposed to be at the show) to decide finally that you couldn't go, and you decided to text, not call.  Your relationship with your friend has already been hurt.  All you can do is apologize and hope for forgiveness.  You should offer to help with future concerts, but not make a big deal out of it if your friend declines your offer.

Answer 6

I think you just changed your mind about helping and were looking for an excuse to bail.

Yes, you were wrong and only time will tell if your friend will forgive you.  Don't make promises you don't know if you'll be able to keep.