Question:

Do think this is normal?

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I had a miscarriage about year ago. To people that have been through this before or can relate, was it selfish of me afterwards not to want to hear about people who were pregnant that was around me, looking at their ultrasound pictures...etc on a daily basis?

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  1. U Selfish ******!

    Jk...not at all...its normal.


  2. No...and it must be even harder for you to hear girls whining about how much they want abortions. Ugh.

    If it is your dearest friends, or sisters, who are happy about their pregnancies, it would be nice of them to not press you too hard, but also nice of you to let them share a little with you. They want to keep you in the loop. It's common courtesy.

    But, if these are work acquaintances, or people you aren't too close to, you might excuse yourself and walk away.

  3. No it's not. That's your way of cooping with the trauma you went threw. It takes allot of time to heal, you are not selfish at all.

  4. Nooooo - your reaction was perfectly normal!

    That's like someone on a strict diet being asked to stare at a triple chocolate cheesecake.  Or someone who recently had his legs amputated being asked to watch a marathon.

    It's probably healthier to avoid pregnant women for a little while than it would be to dote on them.  To dote on them might become an unhealthy obsession.

  5. I haven't been there but lots of friends have. It's akward and sad. You never know what to say. I would have politely asked them not to bring them around. True friends would understand.

  6. no, that's completely understandable. I have never experienced this for myself but my co-teacher's baby died just hours after birth and she didn't want to hear ANYTHING about anyone else being pregnant or anything. right after her baby died one of her cousins started trying for a baby.. and she was proud to talk about it. needless to say, it hurt her to hear about it.

  7. It is SO normal.....it actually took me about three years after mine to be able to deal with others good fortune!! (it was my 4th)  If anybody says anything to you, you have my permission to tell them to go to the bad place!!  I had a friend who had gotten preg right before me and she didn't lose hers.  I tried to be supportive of her (she was thinking of giving hers up for adoption and ultimately did) and one day about a month after I had lost mine she said," I am so sick of being pregnant, I wish I wasn't anymore"  I hung up on her and didn't speak to her again for years!!!!

  8. Not selfish understandable,its got to hurt so much.Your just not ready,you will know when you are ready to start being happy for other people.

    So dont let them make you feel bad for not being happy for them.

  9. I've never been in your situation, but I can tell you that it is certainly not selfish of you to have reacted that way!

  10. no your enormal ..I had a stillborn baby and I would faint when I saw pregant women and newborns for 3 yrs after that

  11. It's understandable

  12. idk

  13. Yes is normal. Don't worry about it. Your still hurting and that's not something you can get over right away. It takes time, your still going though all the emotions. I'm so sorry to hear about your lose. But try to keep your head up.

  14. i've never had a miscarriage but i do want to help. no its not selfish it is very understandable  because it is upsetting . when my grandfather died i hated everyone who had a grandfather because they had someone to share grandfather things with and i didnt get those special moments and after awhile i stoped hating other people and started hating myself and i started drinking and cutting every day . i eventually stopped but only because one of my closest friends noticed my wrists and sat me down and told me WTF is your problem and help me find another outlet to get all my anger and frustration out. now i don't cut or drink and i'm healthy which is  a huge improvement from where i was 6 months ago

  15. No honney.

    I completly understand.

    If I lost my son or daughter I couldn't bear to see another child. It is not selfish of you. In a way your trying to cope with your loss. If you work at a place like that ask if you can be like the secretary. Until you are ready.

    I'm praying for you.

    Your child will rest in peace.

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