Do you allow your child to.................?

Question

point? I was in a restaurant last night and a very young child was pointing at something on a wall that he found interesting. He was trying to show his parents what he found. The father got sooo angry at him for pointing!! "Put your finger down NOW!!"

I can certainly see not pointing at a person........but I see no problem pointing at an object. Do you see a problem with that?

Answer 1

Some people think it's rude, but some times, it's needed. I think for a little one, it can be taught that it's not proper, but they are still little, so it can also be done with ease.

Answer 2

No I don't see a problem with pointing as objects. Shaking your finger at a person when you are talking to them is rude, but if he is trying to express himself by telling his parents something and showing it to them, I don't see the problem with that. I at times wonder the reasoning behind such extreme rules between parents and children.

Answer 3

Wow that sounds mean to me. Yeah pointing or staring at people for any reason is rude unless you are pointing at someone you recognize and saying "oh look there's so and so". I don't see anything wrong with pointing at an object.

Answer 4

It is rude to point most of the time. You can show an item to somebody without pointing. His father should show him how to do that though. If you do not give an alternative, the child will point. I personally have problems with pointing at people, and have taught my children not to do it. But they are 2 and 4 so sometimes they forget.

Answer 5

there's a big difference between pointing at something you are looking at or showing someone and pointing at a person in disrespect.  It's a shame that a parent can't teach that to there child.

Answer 6

i feel sorry for the kid

Answer 7

i dunno the prob is with the father

Answer 8

There is no harm in pointing at objects, as a matter of fact, you can see in some children's picture books that show other children pointing at objects like a balloon floating in the air. They are taught from the start to point at things and letting the parents know what they want before they learn to speak.

I do though not allow my children who are now adults to point at people. it is rude But, at objects...it's fine. I'm sure it stems back when that child's father was a child himself and was taught not to point at anything. We learn allot from our parents and we also tend to change things from how we were raised. My parents made us eat everything that was served on our plates, I don't do that with my children, we are now educated on obesity and forcing a child to eat when full is not good. If my children don't like a vegetable I serve, I have them at least try it before they make that decision of not liking it. They are human like you and I and have likes and dislikes like adults.

Answer 9

They started pointing at the light when you ask where the light is.  They point to their heads, tummies, noses, eyes, etc.  They were 10 months old.  It would be funny trying to tell a baby not to point, huh?

I see no problem with pointing but I guess if a father finds it rude and wants to prevent it then that's just one of those things.

Answer 10

It is rude in most circumstances to point at people, but pointing at objects is part of normal non-verbal communication.

Answer 11

As long as they are not pointing at a person and talking about them I see no problem with pointing. We all point at things. Thats to bad for that child.

Answer 12

It depends on the age of the child. If the said child was a toddler then pointing is normal to do as they don't have the vocabulary to express their discoveries in words just yet the way they want to.  My son is 16 months old and points to things and asks all the time "what's that?" when he see's something new and interesting to him.  It doesn't bug me at all.

NOW, if the child in question were older and able to express themselves in words properly then pointing is a little rude to do unless you're in a woods somewhere and it's the only way to show something specific.  There is a point when it does become rude.  I do NOT think however this particular parent handled it any better than what he was trying to "fix" with his child.  Yelling and getting angry is not how to fix this type of thing. He should have told his son in a voice only his son could hear "you shouldn't point in a restaurant, it's rude because someone may think you're pointing at them." Then he should have let it go. Making an issue for everyone to hear is out of line and all it does is embarrass the child so that next time he wants to know what something is or about something interesting he will likely suppress the interest rather than trying to display it should such a thing continue from the parent.

Answer 13

My oldest son has speech delay. he was born with cleft palate so it hard to understand him at times. I do have him poimt at something. Then I see want he talking about and then I work with him to say that word of want he pointed to. My four year old does the same. He has mild hearing loss. BUt he points it out and says want it is. I let him just incase I don't understand them..

Answer 14

Sounds like the father was the one with the problem.I am a mother of 4 and haven't gotten angry with them for pointing.I do teach them that some pointing is not proper depending on what they are pointing at.

Answer 15

i still point.  not at people. like if i giving someone directions, i  might point left and right as i say it.  sometimes i say, "ooh, look at that billboard" and point.  i even talk with my hands sometimes. that father so overreacted.

i am not a mother but i reallly hate it when i see parents yelling over small trivial things.  i guess i will have to become a parent to find that out.

Answer 16

since the child was very young, then obviously he needed to point to the object, he probably couldnt tell his parents in words what he was showing them. my daughter is almost three and i don't mind her pointing, its her way of conversing as she can't really describe things properly. only when a child reaches a certain age then it should be easier for the parent to explain what is right and what is wrong, and for the child to understand it fully. if the child can't point things out,when they are not able to put in words what they are showing us, then how can they learn what it is.

Answer 17

Sounds like the dad has some issues.  The child is just trying out new things, and wanting to explore.  Hate to see what it is like at home.

Answer 18

Of course i do. Before they learn to talk children should be encouraged to point at what they want. Thinking about it, I at times point, never at people, but at items to show my partner or kids. That poor child!!

Answer 19

I dont like when my 4 1/2 year old points at people. Obviously if shes showing me something or pointing at home I dont care, unless shes pointing in my husband, my other daughter or my face. But yeah I would never yell at her unless she was pointing at someone and laughing or something derogatory like that.

Answer 20

I dont' see a problem with this at all. The child is just learning how to do new things. My daughter is one and she is forever taking me around the house and pointing at things to show me, and talking her cute jibberish.

If the child is really young then they don't usually know what they are doing or pointing at anyway. I think it was unfair of him to get angry.

Answer 21

I was allways raised to not point. I was taught that its rude, plain and simple.

Answer 22

no. it's just hard to get them at a young age to understand why they can ponit at a object on the wall but not a person. but i would not have fussed at my daughter for pointing at something on a wall!!!

Answer 23

since kids have limited vocabulary pointing is fine..the father probably drew more attention to himself by screaming like an idiot

Answer 24

It's actually part of human development.  That's a shame.

Answer 25

Sounds like the guy was just upset in general.  kids will be kids.

Answer 26

I don't see a problem with pointing at objects. If I did have a problem with it, I certainly wouldn't yell at my child for it, I would gently point it out (pun not intended).

Everyone in my family gestures with their hands when they talk, so there's plenty of pointing at various things.

It always bothers me when parents get so angry at their small children for making little mistakes. Whatever happened to encouragement? When did condemnation become so acceptable?

It's one thing to speak with a child for doing something s/he isn't supposed to, but yelling and angry voices should be saved for more serious offenses.

Answer 27

Pointing at objects or even people sometimes is fine!  When they're young no "person" getting pointed at is going to take offense to that!  That father should cool down a bit - Maybe he got mads fun of a lot when he was younger!

Answer 28

I think pointing at an object is fine, as long as it's obvious that they could only be pointing at a thing and not a person (although if it was on the wall, I doubt that was an issue). Personally, when I'm showing an object or person (like if I'm introducing them or something), I tend to sort of use my whole open hand to indicate who/what I'm talking about, but I have no issues with pointing to something in a picture or map or to give someone directions. Obviously, a little kid may not be able to adequately express something verbally, and if they haven't been taught other ways to show what they're talking about, pointing is the only way they know how. I think the kid's father was being a little ridiculous in that situation.