Friends Parents Hate Me?

Question

Alright, here goes. Starting around 7th grade, my friends parents all turned against me. I was in the same honors classes and got the same high grades. I come from a respectable home and a loving family. I suffered from slight depression..but that's it. Now I thought that over time,they would come around and let them hang out with me. Now, as a highschol junior, they are still barring my friends from hanging out with me. When my friend wanted to come on vacation with us, her mother made her aunt follow us and stay in the same hotel. Now, we want to go again and bring her and she's saying no. She's basically implying that my parents are incapable of watching the two of us, let along myself. We are both sixteen and she's a black belt for Pete's sake, I just don't understand. This isn't the only mother to do this. I'm not sure what I've done (Apart from a few colorful hair do's) to deserve this level of isolation from all of my friends.

Answer 1

Have you tried asking your friends' parents why they seem to dislike you? I'd start there. You might be surprised at what they tell you--maybe it's not YOU they hate, but they are trying to watch what their kids are doing in general--trying to supervise their own kids can sometimes seem like they're barring other people's from hanging around.

Maybe they think they know something negative about you, your parents, or family--and they might be wrong. The only way you will ever know is if you flat-out ask them.

Don't be confrontational--just ask. In a nice way.

Answer 2

I'm sorry that you are going through this.  I think if you want your friend to come along the best thing is to have your parents talk to her parents and maybe you can go along and ask why they don't like you in a setting where all adults are present.  I think they probably heard some things about you or your parents that may or may not be true but at least you will know what it is.  It may be painful but be prepared.  Otherwise ask your friends why their parents don't like you.  Tell them be honest with me because I want to know what it is I've done.  

Are your parents more liberal?  Do they dress different than most parents?  Do they party?  If so these parents are afraid that they are not so responsbile.  Good luck!

Answer 3

DO YOU HAVE YOUR OWN RESPECT

OR NOT? IF THEY HATE YOU THEN

WHY DONT YOU CLOSE YOUR FRIENDSHIP

AH THATS IT

Answer 4

I'm afraid it's the colourful hair do's, people base their judgements on things as trivial as this, I would seriously try to make some new friends who value creativity and difference, don't let this blight your life.Also they could be scared of the depression - that it'll rub off on their children, they may be afraid of self harming etc.Don't take this personally, they'd react in the same way if it was any other young person, good luck.  

Answer 5

Your friends parents may not be rejecting you but instead rejecting something about your parents behavior. It is kind of odd that they would make your friends Aunt come along with you all. This sounds like they dont trust someone... you or your family. Maybe your families have different values. For example, maybe your parents drink alcohol socially and they feel this is inappropriate. Maybe the colorful hair dos are the problem. Many traditional parents look down on that type of behavior. The reason why the do is because they see it as abnormal and against societies values and beliefs and they tie something as insignificant as a hair do to you being a bad person. This may not be fair but that doesnt really matter of course. Life isnt fair at times. When you choose your behavior, you choose your consequences regardless if it is fair or not.

The problem may be with supervision. You friend's parents may feel that your parents do not supervise you all well enough.

What bothers me is that you stated that this has happened before in the past. This leads me to believe there is something that either you or your family is doing to turn people away. I agree with the above people stating that you should express your concerns with your friend's parents. Come across as being concerned and not in a negative accusing way.

Counselordan