Grade school girl misleading eye doctor?

Question

My daughter went to the optometrist today. He said very nicely that she was basically lying to get glasses. He was VERY cool about it. I know that she was not lying though. Her teacher told her about 3 weeks ago that she sees blurry. Than this week, she thought so more and had the other kids do math problems with her. The bigger deal it became, the more people told her that she was seeing 2 lines where there was only one.

I explained to the eye doctor that she does not have a pattern of lying but does have a pattern of being subjective to her environment and others expectations of her. I know this because I have been accused of lying to doctors as a woman in my 20's. I apparently gave vague and inconsistent information. I don't know the root of this problem or the 'whys'. But I do know that I want to get my daughter to not be like this because it has caused problems for me. How do I get her to not let others be able to talk her into symtoms or confuse her?

Answer 1

My daughter went to the eye doctor at age 11 and she couldn't see anything during the eye exam.  Her doctor looked at her like, "Are you for real?" and then decided to dilate her eyes to see if they could get a better result.  After the dilation she could see much better (the dilation relaxed her eyes for a better diagnosis).  He explained that sometimes when a child has had eye issues for a while it can cause such a strain that their vision is worse.  She had been squinting for so long that she actually could barely see things far away.  If I was you I would seek a second opinion and ask for her eyes to be dilated before the exam.  I highly doubt your daughter would by lying to get glasses unless all her friends have glasses.  It can't hurt to seek another doctor's advice...your daughter's eye sight is too important.

Good luck!

Answer 2

well, I wouldn't tell her that the Dr said she was lying. Just tell her she doesn't need glasses right now.  hopefully she wont have the same problems you did. Even adults can be subjective to their environment. That shouldn't be hard for the Dr to understand. I really wouldnt make too big a deal of it right now. Just tell her she may get blurred vision occaionally when her eyes are tired (this is true-we all do) and she does not need glasses and her vision is fine.

Did the Dr dialate her eyes? they can get a better look at the pupils when they are dilated. Why does he think she is lying? I sometimes do not understand Drs, One Dr told my brother he thought he was lying because he was "too nice" and smiled too much! jeez!!

I would also talk to the teacher if you think she would help the situtation by not telling her that she sees blurry. she shouldn't have said that in the first place. she doesn't know how your daughter sees. she can only assume and should have shared her concern with you.

Answer 3

If you really think that she is so malleable that she actually "sees" what she thinks others expect her to see, then she needs to talk to a psychologist.  The ability to differentiate herself from what others say about her is pretty critical and basic, and if she doesn't have it, it's not something someone can tell you how to give in a two-paragraph answer on here.  Talk to your pediatrician about a referral.

Answer 4

GO TO ANOTHER DOCTOR