Hate these habits in my boyfriend?

Question

My boyfriend is lovely. The only thng wrong is that he likes to play Worl of Warcraft for like 8 hours a day. Some nights he drinks while he plays and chats to other players. He has started chatting to other players on some Skype thing, after he has finished whatever "raid" they had arranged in the game. Nearly every day he says "I've got a raid tonight so I will be busy at X time till...." Then he runs over time, just messing around and chatting to other players.

When he is drinking too he gets quite drunk and then stinks of boooze and cigarettes. He dominates the whole living room while he does this. He also refuses offers of nice things that I want to do that will take him away from the computer, like going for a drive along the beach, saying he can't be bothered.

I find it such a massive turn-off, I have told him so many times just how much I hate him drinking but he says I am a killjoy and that he didn't really drink that much anyway.

He looks so pathetic when he does this, I can't be attracted to him, just pity him and worry for him.

But other than this, he's fantastic. However I hate this habit so much it makes me want to leave him. What would you do?

Answer 1

Sit down and talk to him.  I am very familiar with WoW.  I even played it.  (I'm tired of the game though, because you need to be in those scheduled raids to get further into the game.)  Tell him that the game is really hurting your relationship.  I also don't like the fact that he is just chugging booze and smoking away.

If he doesn't listen, you may have to leave him.  World of Warcraft has the nickname World of Warcrack because people get addicted to the thing.  If it is affecting you for 8 hours of the day, doesn't leave time for too much else between sleep, work, meals, and errands, does it?  That game is a curse. I blame it for breaking up my previous 6 year relationship.  (My boyfriend got depressed from school and work, but he never even tried due to that game.  Things got worse from there.)  Thank goodness the current one (whom I met through WoW) knows better.  I rarely see him online.

Seriously, you have to make him realize what he is doing to himself and you both in general, or you are going to lose him.

Answer 2

Only you know what your tolerance level is...the gaming and chatting is one thing but the drinking...I think not.

Answer 3

Kick him to the curb.  This whole gaming addiction is a giant case of arrested development.  I know several young adults who spend more time on WOW and the like than they do working.  Something is wrong here.  You deserve a guy who knows you're alive.

Answer 4

Leave, grow some bone where you currently have jello and leave. You know where this is going. Why are you with this boy...note 'boy'. Men, real ones, do not behave this way. He is ignoring you, deliberately and when you rightfully complain, he tells you that you are blowing his bliss. Time to bow out, yes, leave. He probably won't notice if you do it during a drunken raid, sad isn't it? Thats why you need out, this won't change. You will not change him, he certainly won't change for you. The relationship, if ever you had one is over and one sided. Drop him like a bad habit and find an attentive man who knows when to drop the lappy.

Answer 5

........time to look & go elsewhere!!

Answer 6

Thank god you are just dating this child and not married.  Time to move on to someone who can appreciate YOU and share YOUR interests.

Answer 7

you have to let him go, hes not for you

Answer 8

What bothers you more the drinking or the gaming?

Rule # 1: YOU CAN NOT CHANGE PEOPLE.

If you have expressed your worries (during a time he wasn't playing) & doesn't make any effort to change or take you seriously, well, leave him.  

Answer 9

Other than being a drunk and spending a full work day's worth of time (time that he can't spare to spend with you) playing a game and chatting with strangers "he's fantastic"?

He's a loser, and if you stay with him, you'll catch it, too.  Have some self-respect, girl, get yourself a real boyfriend and not a childish facsimile.

Answer 10

Dated a guy just like this once...Dump him.  Even if a guy plays video games, he should be able to give you the time of day. Obviously, WOW is his main priority right now; is it yours too?  Good luck.

Answer 11

You need to ask yourself one question - Would you be better off without him? His habit sounds like an addiction to me.

Answer 12

Look at the bright side. At least you know where he is and that he won't have to drive home. It's better than him being out somewhere with his friends and you don't know if he's dead or alive.

Answer 13

You need to add up all the good things... (If any) about him and see how they shape up to the BAD.

You teach people how to treat you, So by still dating him while he drinks, smokes and plays video games it shows him whats acceptable.

You say you he's fantastic so try having a "break" from each other for a week... You might be surprised he will either cry his guts out and miss you so badly that he will give up three addictions for you or he will continue to consume himself in his habits and not respect you or treat you the way you deserve.

Life is far to short to spend one extra day of your life with a looser.

Chin up sweetie you deserve a man to pay you attention, respect you and your feeling.