This may seem like a weird question because it's something that happens a lot in life.
But pretty much all my friends are leaving for university and just going away.
I'm fine about that but there are 3 in-particular and i just don't know how i'm going do live without them.
One of them is leaving in a days time. I've known this has been coming for a whole year and have DREADED it. She's pretty much my 'best friend'. For ages now i've distanced myself from her completly so it wouldn't be so hard to say good-bye...i mean we hardly even speak to eachother nowadays. Although seeing as i missed her leaving night she's now wanting to come round for a chat and basically say good bye. I have NO idea why she wants to stir everything up and just make me more upset like this. It'l make things 10 times worse when she does go. I feel empty and completly powerless by it all. I've talked to her about really personal things such as self harm. She was the one who encouraged me to go see my GP about it and offered to talk when things got too much.
Also i think when she does come round (to say bye) it's going to be awkward becasue the last time we spoke i apparently said some hurtful things. Didn't mean it and i remember what i said but i didn't think they were that bad...although another friend seems to disagree.
It's just how do you say bye to someone who means so much to you?!
Before anyone says 'she wont be gone forever' or anything...she pretty much will. She will meet new friends, new surroundings, new life...one that i wont be a part of.
This is quite stupid and i know i should just sort of get over it and realise that it's part of life and growing up but i CAN'T!
I would just love for everyone to just stay how they are...nothing to change. Not even jobs, houses, friends etc...
I know that can't happen.
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