How to proceed with ex ?

Question

Okay, so my son's biological father contacted me via email saying he wanted to get back in touch with our son, and asking for forgiveness. He also specified that he was on the road and would email again in a few days. Well that was 9 days ago and we haven't heard another thing.

I don't feel that i should be the one to follow up with him or pursue him in any way. I feel it is his place after being absent for 11 years with no contact, to put forth the effort.

I am not sure if I should send an email to him and if so what should i say, as i do not want to push him away, but i do not want to be overly generous either.

I just don't want to set my son up for disappointment or hurt, but i do want to allow him contact with his father if he wishes.

Answer 1

Don't chase him up, if he turns up then allow him the access but he is a stranger to you now. Treat him like he is another passenger on the train, acknowedge him but don't draw him into your life.

Answer 2

Do not, I repeat, do not email him! If he was absent for 11 years, do not set your son up 4 further heartache by an absentee father. I pray u haven't told your son abt this contact. U r right 2 feel that it is his place 2 put forth the effort--he should!

If u were willing 2 give him another chance 2 be a part of your son's life (esp after sooo long), he should've shown the responsibility, class, guts, respect, consideration, etc. 2 honor his word 2 email u. Apparently he isn't ready 2 accept responsibility 4 what he's done & what he should do.

I know it's not easy, but try 2 chalk it up 2 it being his loss & his being an absolute inconsiderate jerk & move on.