How would you take this email?

Question

Thanks for the pictures. It was nice playing with her Saturday. You really need to get her out of that ignoring people thing cause it will only come back to bite you in the *** when she gets older.

First, my daughter is two years old and this was the first time she met my Aunt. Also, I was at my mothers and my daughter has seen my mother all of five times really. I do not get along with my Aunt, but that has nothing to do with my daughter and her. I want them to establish a relationship, as long as it's healthy. My daughter is polite and very outgoing but around strangers she gets quiet, then warms up.

Should I reply or just leave it?

Answer 1

Or instead of just leaving it alone and because you want your aunt to have a relationship with her why not tell her you'd love to have her come over more often so your little one can get to know her better.  There is no reason you can't explain to your aunt what you did for us here.  

Answer 2

Leave it alone Don't stoop down to her level just ignore it!

Answer 3

just leave it alone there is no point in stooping to her level..

Answer 4

I'd probably say something like, "Thanks for your concern, "Annie" is really outgoing once she gets to know you. It's nice that you were able to spend some time with her."

Answer 5

leave it and forget about helping them to form a rltp.  

Answer 6

Here's what I would say,

You're welcome for the pictures. I'm glad you got to play with her, isn't she fun?

I'm actually glad she's sometimes shy around people she doesn't yet know well. I'd be too nervous when we were out in crowded places if she just wanted to be around anybody.

See you soon!

Answer 7

I would just leave it.  She probably has no idea what a toddler is like.

Answer 8

It's hard to let it go.  If you're not close to them anyway, I don't see a reason to get into it with them.  You know who your daughter really is and that's really all that matters.  :)  Anyway, I think it's good to have a child who is cautious around people she doesn't know.  She is less-likely to get abducted and whatnot, I would think!  Hug your daughter and forget the rest.  

Answer 9

Leave it - from what you've said it seems as if you and your aunt don't have the best relationship and she may just be picking at you to get you all fired up.  Ignore her, take the high road.  If you respond, you will just let her know that she's succeeded in making you mad.

Answer 10

Well, that depends.  Do you feel like getting into it with her or not?

I have a five year old daughter that is somewhat on the shy side.  She will avoid eye contact and even try to ignore people when they speak to her because she is a little shy.  I have taught her that it is okay to be shy, but it's not okay to be rude.  When someone speaks to her I expect her to answer even if it is just a nod of the head.  When she hides behind me after answering, most people get the hint and leave he alone.  I told her that shyness is no excuse for bad manners and it is bad manners not to respond when someone speaks to her.  I also told her that if the person just would not leave her alone, I would step in and say, "She's a little shy and would rather not talk".  But I will only do this for her IF she uses good manners and makes eye contact and responds to others in a polite manner.

If your aunt's opinion really matters to you, explain why your daughter didn't respond to her. If he opinion doesn't matter, ignore the email.

Answer 11

As everyone else says - just let it go. Most two year olds are very shy around people they don't know too well, and it might seem like they are "ignoring" them.

If you're aunt is ignorant enough to believe that every 2 year old is going to be completely friendly with people she's never met before, then it's a lost cause to try to say anything back anyway.

And besides - it's not always a bad thing for kids to "ignore" strangers. We are supposed to teach our kids to be wary of people they don't know anyway.  

Answer 12

Just ignore it and if she says anything just say I guess she gets it from her mom. I would probably ignore it. It was rude and she could have left that part out. Give the poor girl a break she is 2!  

Answer 13

I would respond:

"It was nice to see you too and Amy had a lot of fun.  Since Amy's only 2, she's still a bit shy when she meets new people.  I hope she will warm up to you a little more next time."

Even though it's tempting to tell her off, don't give her a reaction.  Respond in a polite and mature matter.  

Answer 14

Just leave it.

Kids are often shy around strangers.  Your aunt probably doesn't know much about kids.

Answer 15

Reply, but ignore anything she said that upset you and only tell her good things, like, "Thanks! I'm glad you had a good time with her!"

If your Aunt is going to say things like that...maybe it won't be a healthy relationship...she sounds like a very "I know what's best" kind of person.

Answer 16

Your Aunt is extremely rude and immature.  I would just ignore her though, it's obvious she's trying to annoy you.  Don't give her that satisfaction.

Answer 17

I think that you guys should sit down and talk. Iron out the differences that the two of you have been avoiding. I think once you two come to some sort of equal footing as far as respecting each other and understanding the others point of view, she won't be as critical as she was and you won't be as easily defensive/offended as you are.

Answer 18

Write back and tell her to bite your ***. JK. It just sounds like a typical older person trying to put their 2 cents in. They all do it. Don't even sweat it. If you do reply say " Oh you are definitly welcome. She enjoyed spending time with you guys too. As far as ignoring ppl, she only does that to ppl she don't know that well. Right now, that may be a good thing (lol). Thanks for the advice though."

Answer 19

It does seem very tempting to respond back, but that just seems like a bait for an argument.  It's normal for 2 year olds to be shy and quiet around new people.  Maybe your Aunt was just having a crappy mood that day, so don't let it upset you.  

Answer 20

I'd ignore the email and let her be annoyed about that.

That's seriously rude and shows some serious cluelessness about 2-year-olds.  A lot of little kids are slow-to-warm-up, and it's totally normal and says nothing about their future behavior.

Answer 21

You should just leave it.  If she brings it up again, remind her that she is only two years old and she doesn't know everyone in the family yet.  Your aunt is still a stranger to her.  Remind her that you are her mother and you will decide what's best and you will decide how to raise your child.

Answer 22

You may not want to just ignore it.  This aunt could be treating your daughter in a negative way because this, and that's not fair to your daughter.  I wouldn't be confrontational, but maybe just have a calm discussion about toddlers and how all kids ignore people at one point or another, because that's what they do.  They're learning social boundries and meeting new people.