I need Help please!!?

Question

On my profile there's a question i asked which tells you about every think! Please read so you will understand this question!

I just don't know what to do with my self any more, i thought it would be different this time i thought if we broke up again i would be able to handle it but i cant, its happening all over again which i didn't want to happen. I just don't know what to do all i think about is him and whats he doing now, and why he suddenly don't want to make it work, hes using me as an excuse to end it because i lied once, its like he rather be with his mate and smoke weed than rather to work us to out after 3 years! how can u let someone of 3years just go? how do you carry on..

what can i do.. everyone makes out its easy to forget... last time i was starting to forget and move on but now its happened again I'm just losted! Hes not showing no emotion i know he cares and loves for me he just don't want to admit it.. why should i even bother i think to my self but its just so different not being with that person no more and moving on to some one else you think its not the same and your never going to get back in to a relatsionship.. i got that sickly feeling inside me where i just dont want to do anythink just go to sleep to forget about it.. but i dont want that i want to show iam having a good time without thinking of him all the time. Iam so down right now and so sad:(

Answer 1

Let him free if you love him enough. If it doesn't meant to be together

It's happen for a reason. Love yourself first be selfish. You'll find happiness.  

Answer 2

First things first.  Go to your doctor as you are clearly depressed.  Get some help from him/her.  Next look at yourself.  Are you nice to look at or have you let things go a bit?  Is your hair nice, clothes clean and nice, nail varnish not chipped and nasty.  etc  Give yourself a bit of a sort out if you need to.

Next - have you got a best friend who will talk to you without being nasty about your ex.  You don't need those things at the moment, you need to know how you are going to cope with this and a good friend will help YOU -  not talk about your ex.

Are you in a position to work?  If so, get as many jobs as you can.  Get an evening job - anything to keep you busy.

I know you probably don't fancy it, but try to do something you've never done before - go for a walk, take jive lessons - anything new that will give your brain something to think about.  Don't just go down the pub - do something else that you really like doing.

Lastly change the way you think about your ex.  Agree with yourself that you are going to think about him for 5 minutes then STOP for half an hour and give yourself another 5 mins.  Its trains your mind to think of other things.

Don't rush into another relationship as you will try to replace your ex with someone else and that will fail.  Get to know yourself and like yourself before you start another relationship.  If you make yourself strong enough to survive without a relationship, you will be happier and people will be attracted to you because you are fun and nice to be with.   It takes time. Broken arms don't mend overnight, neither to broken hearts. Be patient. Go for it and good luck.

Answer 3

you spent 3 years in a realtionship and less time doing what ur meant to do at ur age which is experiencing life etc and i so know what u mean i am 25 and have already been through marrige,divorce, kids etc and so wish if i could turn back the time to do things different i would its def not easy to forget your emoitionaly attached to someone and the hardest part is to unattach yourself so maybe now is the time to question what u realy want in life? you have already lost a few years on having fun and look where its got u? u need to have a real good think  

Answer 4

i on my wifes computer we only been married 7 week and she 3 months pregnant she as shunned me told me to leave give her space to breathe and make decisions i to am finding it hard to do . dont give up just try hard to respond to what they want the space its killing me being in limbo not knowing which way to turn or what to do but reading your plight so simular to mine i suggest you do what i just decided let em have there space if they truly love you then they will let you know if not then it was probably not true love in the first place. cheer up kev

Answer 5

Normally i would suggest lots of ideas to help sort your relationship out, but not this time.  You have given it 2 very good go's and he has failed to sort him self out.  He still smokes, which is probably the biggest issue that prevents him from sorting him self out.

It sounds like you need to step away from this relationship.  Somethings were just not meant to be.

It will be hard to move on.  But think of it as time to make changes to all the areas of your life that need work.  If there is a job you have always wanted start applying for it, Go and buy some new clothes, and get a new hair cut.  Start hanging out in Better Bars/Clubs (places he would never go/or take you). Try and meet a better man.  Someone who does not smoke weed, who treats ladies like they are the most import things in the world.  Find a man who will wine and Dine you, and make you feel special.  Once u have that you will find it is a lot easier to forget him.  And maybe seeing you move on will actually help him realise he has to sort his life out, thus leaving him would be the best thing you could ever do for him.

Answer 6

look everyone has been through what you are going through right now , but with time your pain will go , its a part of life , just call it growing pains , we are as happy as we want to be