I need advice with my children???

Question

My husband and I have two kids. A son that is 7 and a daughter that is 5. We made the horrible mistake of letting them sleep with us when they were babies, and now I don't know how to get them out of my bedroom. My son sleeps in a seperate bed in our room, and our daughter sleeps with us. I have tried putting them to bed in their own rooms by staying with them for a little while, and by just putting them in there and letting them cry it out. Neither worked. They both say that they are scared. I don't know if they truly are scared, or if that's a ploy to make me feel bad and let them sleep with us. I have even tried letting them sleep together in another room, and that doesn't work either. Someone please give me some advice. My husband and I need some privacy, but I am a sucker when it comes to them crying.

Answer 1

okay i was like this with my mom till i was like eight

first she started me off sleeping with my brother but she would stay there till i fell asleeep and read to me or just talk to me til i was tired then she moved me to my bed once she didnt have to talk to me or stay with me until i fel asleep in my brothers bed and now i have no issues sometime when i have a night mare i go in her room but other than that i dont really care anymore

and they probably are really scared i know i was especially when we moved to a new neighbor hood

Answer 2

let them cry they will get tired after a while and fall asleep!

Answer 3

You could try putting a tv in their room and keep it on.  Or you could put a night light in their room.  You could always let them cry it out and when they get up to in the middle of the night, get up and put them back in their room.  It's easier said than done.....I know, I have a 1 and 2 year old in our bed...this is advice others have given me, but haven't had the heart to try it out yet.  Good Luck!

Answer 4

my rule of thumb would be that if they are old enough to notice, question and begin to make sense out of mommy and daddy's special alone time "activities" then they need to move out on their own.  

if you do not, your husband will tire of the situation real soon and you two will will suffer.  i wasnt a fan of sending them out when they were babies but at 7 & 5, they need to learn.  they'll deal with it.

Answer 5

I don't think it was a horrible mistake to let them sleep with you. Co-sleeping is a wonderful thing. My son slept with us until he was 2  now at 31/2 he has been in his own room for over a year. Do they have a night light? If not let them pick out one or a safe lamp that they like.  Or let them pick out new bed sets but they can only have them if they stay in their own bed and room all night. Tuck them in at night and read them a story or get a special stuffed animal and before they go to bed  you give the toy a big hug and say thats part of you with them. It may take some time but it will work. Good Luck.

Answer 6

You just have to grow up, be a parent, and get over it. You need your privacy, and they need to be big kids. The only way to change is to deal with the crying. You can do things to make it more pleasurable like let them go to the store and pickout a new blanket to put on their big kid bed in their big kid room. You can also put a neat night light in there. I'm sure that they do scared because they aren't used to be alone. Perhaps bunk beds would be alright for the first couple of months. You need to stop this ASAP. My sister is eleven and still sleeps with my mother. You don't want to be like that trust me.

My best advice is your the mom. Sometimes mom's have to put up with their kids being unhappy to benefit them. And, the real world is just that way. I go to work even though I don't want to so that I have a roof over my head. Your kids sleep in their own beds even though they don't like it so that they can be independent.

My son is two years old, sleeps in his room, in his bed, every night. He doesn't scared, and he doesn't crawl in bed with mommy and daddy. You have spoiled them, and now there is no easy way out.

If you want your privacy, deal with the crying. It will get better in a few weeks.

Answer 7

OMG..I'm going thru the same h**l..I feel for you girl on that.I have a night rutral where We do the same thing.

a.brush teeth

b.put on pjs

c.read a good night story.

and leave on night light from the hallway..She say's the little night light is to small and so..We use the hallway light.

some days she sleeps on her own others she cries and I have to shut the door and tell her GOOD NIGHT and not talk to her again until the morning when she is cried out and tried from crying the night before..

Set up a night time rountine and stick to it.That is how..I'm doing it for now.