In-laws and deadbeat dads

Question

choice4....consider yourself blocked. You are making assumptions about my situation without knowing what it is.....judgmental much?

Answer 1

Well for me it was hard , because the man I thought I would grow old with just up and left me and the baby . Then his mother got involved in this and I thought okay , you are more then welcomed to come see her anytime you want too. They lived in Ga and at the time I was living in Cal. So when the baby was born I sent them pictures of her and asked the dad to please help with sending her some clothes and diapers. And that didnt work at all. He didnt help me at all. I wasnt after his money . Then when my daughter was like 4 or 5 yrs. old He called and asked if he could come and see her so I said of course you can. Well that was not so good I was in a very nice relationship with my hubby now for 12 yrs. And he never did spend any money on her but I didnt asked. And that was that . And to this very day I havent heard from him at all. And I do have pictures of him and I have given to my daughter but she gave them back and said he is not my dad. She is 14 years old, and a very nice young lady .  

Answer 2

I allow and have always allowed the deadbeat's mother to visit and have relationships with her grandsons. Unfortunately, my ex learned his bad habits from his mother who never set a good example or taught him how important family values are, she had 9 kids and 6 different fathers, never married, lived on welfare most of her life, so she has never made any attempts to be involved and has never, ever helped with expenses. The deadbeat has been ordered to pay child support and has been trying to get out of it since day one. He hasn't seen the boys for at least 2 years, they don't even remember what he looks like and he doesn't want to see them. Fortunately, I have since then married a wonderful man and now have wonderful in-laws who are very involved, loving, caring, and supportive of the two boys and my youngest who is their biological grandson. I'm not sure how I will feel when these people decide to drop back into my kids' lives. All I know is that I will not allow them to play games with my children's feelings and if they want to be involved, they need to be consistent or they will have to go to court to explain to the judge why they've chosen to abandon their own kids/grand kids.

Answer 3

It's not only deadbeat dads out there.  There are a fair share of deadbeat moms out there also.  My fiance has sole custody of his daughter because her mother is nuts.  He has no relationship with the baby mama's family.  The mother does not help out at all, she up and moved 14 hours away.  No help from her or her family at all.  He tried to send pictures and artwork to her mother but it got sent back because she gave a bogus address.

Answer 4

My daughters biological father may pay child support once every blue moon. (very rare) Doesn't visit, doesn't call doesn't do anything. My relationship with his mom is nothing. She tried to be nice at one point, but then she cussed me out and called me every name in the book. So guess what, no communication what so ever. She called my daughter a b*****d and that was it. The other relationship would be his grandmother. But she is so old she doesn't remember my phone number and any time she does remember it's trying to get money out of me to help him....... I DON'T THINK SO. So, my daughter has no relationship with her biological father.

Answer 5

WEll, I do not trust any of them on her other side.  he beat me, she watched.  So they can have no contact.

Answer 6

You should stop slandering your child's father like that.  If you chose to conceive a child with a 'deadbeat', how much smarter does that make you?

If there is a child involved, let the kid have a relationship with his grandparents based on how much they want it, not how much money they have .  The best thing they grandparents have to give is love, not money.

Answer 7

How childish to block someone just cause you don't agree with their answers.  YOU choose to have s*x, gestate and deliver a baby by this man, the birth control didn't force you.  

Anyways, If you don't want opinions, you probably shouldn't be on Yahoo posting your business.  Good luck for the child's sake!

Answer 8

well i think they should visit and participate in the childs life.

Answer 9

if my childrens father was a dead beat (which hes not)..and it wasnt because of the family he was brought up in.. i would definetly bring the kids to see grandma and grandpa..

did you know that where im from.. if i refuse to let my children see their grandparent for a legitimate reason.. they can take me to court for visitation rights??

Answer 10

My son's father is as much of a deabeat as possible... He never told his parents. He hasn't ever had contact with my son and his family hasn't either. I think it would be hard to have grandparents involved but not the father- the kid would be very confused. And no, my son and I have never received any help from his father at all- not a dime of child support and clearly no emotional support.

Answer 11

Given that child support and visitation aren't allowed to be connected under the law, I do give my daughter's grandmother liberal visitation and send pictures.  She has reciprocated with helping out by giving me some money and by purchasing clothes and school supplies.