Insecure husband..please help.?

Question

my husband is an arab man who is employed in saudi..i live in the uk, as i want to stay here with my family. he has really bad health issues and psycological probs from the war and fighting in lebanon. i understand this. BUT if i dont talk to him everyday, or i miss a text he sends, he goes off the rails, threatens to kill himself, or ends up in hospital cos he doesnt take his meds. just now, he sent a text, supposedly from someone else saying he has died. i just collapsed in the shop i was in...then when i called distraught in tears, he calmly says...i love you so much anna , i just want to test u that u love me too.....please help. he is all i ever want, but im wrecked with his insecurity.

Answer 1

Whoa sorry 2 say but ur hubby scares the living bugullia outta me.  If my man did that id really fear for my life and my childrens.  He has psycological problems and he honestly sounds like a ticking time bomb.  Just becareful that's all I say

Answer 2

he's crazy. leave him.

Answer 3

he is emotionally blackmailing you....

Answer 4

I honestly don't know what to say or advise to give you. But i think that your husband threatening you that he is going to kill himself and especially pretending to have died to test you is very sick. I think you need to speak to your husband and think really is this long distance relationship going to work more so on his part. Hope everything works out for you x

Answer 5

That's sick.  I don't like ANYTHING that says about him.  He's manipulative, cruel, and self centered.  He doesn't need to be pumped with meds, he needs psychological help.  

Answer 6

Get as far away from him as  possible, he's mad.

That is not normal. Divorce him and go  somewhere where he cant find you.

good luck

Answer 7

call his bluff and divorce him.  he's keeping you prisoner by doing harm to you emotionally.

Answer 8

if that is true.. honestly LISTEN TO ME, if a man truly did love you, he wouldn't want to put you through anything ordeal, sounds to me like this person is not ready to love and be loved. i would say leave him, find someone that truly loves you and can trust you.  

Answer 9

wow

Answer 10

I know it states, for better for worse and to death do us part, but don't you think sometimes mistakes you make are better fixed rather than living with?

Answer 11

this is not a heathy relationship he is extremely controlling and thank your lucky stars you dont live together as if he is this good at emotional blackmail and guilt trips being miles away could you imagine what he would be like if he was there 24/7  i say get out of this marriage or it will be u needing treatment for mental health problems in the end  

Answer 12

time to call it a day oh horny one!.xx

Answer 13

i really think that you need to go there i mean like that is your husband and he needs you right now. even if you stay for a little while

Answer 14

y doesnt he move in the uk, theres plenty of jobs here, or y dont u go to saudi for a while and stay together until hes sorted

Answer 15

explain to him that this behaviour in unacceptable and is not helping the marriage.  Give him another chance and ask God to mend your marriage and make him more bearable.  Bottom line: be frank with him, then give him another chance.

Answer 16

It's not insecurity, it's INSANITY.

Answer 17

Omg hun, he is emotionally blackmailing you. For him to make out he has died is an awful thing to do believe me if you keep giving in to him he will get worse and wear you down.

Answer 18

Run as far as you can

Answer 19

Wow, the guy is psycho! I don't mean to sound harsh, but that is crazy.

Answer 20

i was separated from my husband for a period of time while he was in the United Arab Emirates (me in the USA) and without any health issues, psycho or otherwise, we experienced extreme separation anxiety. we had frequent irrational arguments and lots of insecurity. month-long visits were the only remedy--email and phone calls were just not enough.  i understand your husband's actions. you being separated from one another IS VERY stressful. I strongly recommend you visit him for at least 2 weeks. good luck.

Answer 21

First of all, its takes a very strong woman to love a military/veterans man!  Second, I need my very own wife to be right next to me, 24/7.  I could not take long distance relationships. Long distance relationships cannot work for me!  Maybe you should forget your family and be with him, very closely. Your husband needs to retired being a soldier!  You and him need a relocate to Hawaii or some beautiful place to live at and just relax!! He sounds like he is under tons of stress and pressure!  

Answer 22

This doesn't sound right to me either to be honest. Think you need to do something about him, you can't stay with him, unless something changes. Or surely you will go insane as it seems you don't really know where you stand with him or what is going through his head.

I really think you need to talk to him about this and sort something out between yourselves.

Best of luck for the future.

Answer 23

Omg, who would do smth like that to a person they love (telling he's dead just to test you?) He doesn't deserve your love and your tears. If you want to leave him, don't feel guilty, don't feel you owe him anything, he's putting you throw the nightmare you don't deserve, he's just manipulating you.