Question:

Is my niece a mean child?

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She's never been an overly sweet child but she's always been pretty well behaved. Last weekend she was staying at my mom's house and she brought her 2 month old puppy with her. I was with her in one of the bedrooms and the puppy was playing near the edge of the bed. I stepped away and came back in the room just as the puppy fell off the bed and landed on her face on the hard tile. My niece thought this was hilarious. I didn't, but I didn't know what to say. I'm not her mother so I didn't feel comfortable scolding her. I did tell her grandmother so that she's aware of what happened. Is this normal behavior for an 11 yr old? Sometimes I think I'm overreacting but it really bothered me that she watched that puppy start falling over and just waited for it to happen so she could laugh. I haven't told my brother (her father). She comes from a good, stable home.

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  1. I would say that is a bit mean. My kids have a puppy and we got him at 5 months, they are 7 and 9 and would NEVER laugh if he fell off the bed. They baby him as much as I did them when they were infants. She should also know better at 11 to not have a puppy by the edge of a bed. She sounds a bit self centered, but I cannot really say from just one incident sometimes things just strike us funny. There have been times my kids or other people have tripped (not gotten hurt of course) and I have found it hysterical, so its hard to say.


  2. That was cruel and she shouldn't have the puppy. She doesn't know how to care for it and the puppy will suffer because of it.

    If anything like this happens again, tell her parents.

  3. I have a 9 year old step-daughter who is similarly lacking in empathy/sympathy/compassion for others.  She reacts very strongly to her own pains and hardships and cries at the drop of a hat when something is not right in her world but if someone else were to experience the same pains or hardships she cannot relate and shows no consideration.   As her aunt, you have every right to intervene if you are concerned about her actions.  This could potentially be a sign of much worse things to come as she gets older.  If I were her mother/father I would be thankful that you cared for the well-being of my child.  We are considering enrolling her in some counseling and perhaps your neice would benefit from something similar.

  4. Normal reaction would be

    Oh my goodness!  You fell!! Poor little thing! Are you all right??  Are you hurt anywhere?

    What an weird child to laugh at a possible serious injury.

    I hate to be the one to say this,

    She may be sneaking and hurting the puppy behind closed doors.  Have seen that happen before.

  5. Definitely lacking compassion. Most children cuddle puppies and baby them, not laugh when they fall on their face. I would tell her father and he can decide if she should have to give up the puppy. He may have already seen questionable behavior in regards to the dog and this information may help him. Even children from good, stable homes can show cruelty to animals. Have you seen her being mean to other defenseless animals or people? That would definitely cause me great concern.

  6. Yeah that sounds a little mean.  It seems like she doesn't care for the well-being of others.

  7. You didn't mention if this is the first pet that this child has ever owned.  It was cruel to not try and save this puppy from a fall that could have really injured it.  And to laugh at it and think it was hilarious is not normal behaviour for an 11 year old.  Just because you are not the parent, doesn't mean that you shouldn't have chastised the child for this.  Kids learn continually from everyone around them, and for you not to have taken her to task over this is not acceptable.  An innocent little critter like that--damned what the mother would think--you should have stood up for the pup.

  8. Sometimes it is funny when puppies fall over.  It is the same with humans.  As long as the puppy was not hurt she, along with many other sweet people, will laugh.

  9. are you kidding? she so retarded and immature! who would laugh at that poor puppy smacking it's face on cold, hard tile?!

  10. It is normal, and yes immature.  Most kids do something like that at one point.  We do correct our neices and nephiews, but that was after having a chat with the parents making sure it was ok to do so, and making sure of their rules for things.

  11. No, i laugh at other peoples pain time to time

  12. First I would talk to her parents and others like her friends or may be teacher to see how see reacts and treat people or things before I say that she is mean. My sister was like that when she was 11 and we took it as immaturity but it wasn't she was diagnosed as bipolar at 20. You need to see if this is a isolated incident but I doubt it is. She may need to be started it in counseling or medicated before it gets out of hand. I just wouldn't take it lightly because we did and now my little sister is so violent and there is nothing we can do because she can decide whether or not she wants meds or counseling. Please don't sit on it.

  13. What is troublesome here is that your niece has not learned to have compassion for another living thing.

    Her parents have not developed in her a compassionate side for others.  She probably wouldn't care if they were hurt.

    This child needs help now or she will become a very cold hearted adult and probably capable of hurting others as she will not care.

    I'm glad you are aware of this and I hope you can help, but it will not be easy.  Maybe you could get her a book on how to care for a puppy?   Your parents have done a good job.

  14. She is probably a little of both.  As a girl though, I would have thought her more likely to catch the puppy before it fell.  Did she at least pick it up and cuddle/kiss it as you normally would when someone/something is hurt?

    As her Aunt, you do have the right to comment/scold/praise her regarding any type of behavior you think warrantsremarking on.  Actually, do don't even need to be a relative to advise a child of good or bad behavior.

    mb

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