Is she still right for me?

Question

Ok there's this girl I've been friends with since we were 5. When we were in middle school, she told me she liked me, and I liked her too, but I never made a move because she was white, and I was too young to be kicked out of my parents house. About a year later she moved away, now she's back for college. (6 years later) She is so pretty now, I'm barely still in her league. She doesn't have a boyfriend, and I'm almost out of school. When I saw her she hugged me, but she doesn't have that same look in eyes she used to. If I can't have her as my girl, I at least want her as a friend. Should I risk asking her out, I don't want us to be awkward, and never talk again. By the way, I'm north indian, and my parents are in the process of arranging me with a girl I've never even seen before. Is it worth it?

Answer 1

Dude...if you don't ask her out...you will mess up your marriage 'cause you will always think about what if. Just get with her and test out a date...Go for coffee or something...You must do this now and get it out of your system 'cause you have feelings for her. Take Care

Answer 2

mmm...well, if your parents are arranging a marriage, would they accept her?

you won't be able to keep her as a friend when you're married, so better make your move now?

just my opinion.

Answer 3

If you have strong feelings about this girl then I think that you should go for it.  You don't want to live your life thinking "what if..." so take a chance and it will only be awkward if you make it that way. Also, be upfront with your parents about how you feel about the arranged relationship. I hope everything works out for you.  

Answer 4

Arranged marriages should be outlawed.  You can take the girl to dinner and not have anything other than eating in mind.  If I were in your shoes, I would run as far as I could run from this arranged marriage c**p.  This is 2008, for the love of God.  Go find your own woman to love and marry.  

Answer 5

If you know that she may still have feelings for you, then yes you should ask her out on a date. You two have been through so much, and that would definitely make a good love story if she still has feelings for you, but if she doesn't like you say at least be friends. As far as your parents arranging a girl for you, and if you truly know that you and your friend is something really serious then of course its worth it. My parents didn't want me and my hubby to be together cause he was younger than me, and now him and I are married :) Oh but keep in mind that since you haven't seen this girl in years, its normal for all those feelings to rush in, give it a little bit of time for you to realize if she's really the one or just a good friend. Good luck ;)

Answer 6

You're waiting on an arranged marriage and wanting to date?  If you can't get out of that, then I'd say don't see this girl from school...you would be always thinking of her and not your wife.

If you can get out of the arranged marriage, then start seeing the girl as a friend.  Start slow and see if there's still any connection.

Answer 7

tell her how you feel...what's the worst that can happen. it's obvious you like this girl very much and it would be a shame if you didn't at least find out how she felt.

an arraigned marriage...don't know if i could do that.

good luck.

Answer 8

theres no chance of u guys going out if u never ask. it could work though cuz my cousin is north indain and hes going out with a white girl. everyone in my family hates it and thinks its gonna end in a divorce, but u can try. i think the girl he likes is really nice, but she asks too many questions about the indain culture and its gets annoying. some ppl in my family dont care its just they dont want him to get hurt if it doesnt work out. try asking her, might work out in ur family.

Answer 9

Start to take responsibility for your own life. Tell your parents to back off and not arrange anything for you - after all you don;t want to mess around the poor girl they're setting you up with. Get to know this girl you're interested in again. Get to know her as a friend for a couple of weeks or more, then when you ask her out it won;t be so awkward if she's not up for it - because you'll already be friends so she'll see that friends can work too.

Answer 10

If it's worth it to you, then it's worth it.  Personally I think it is.  Never hurts to try you know.

Answer 11

You should ask this advice at Jamrie.com

People on the website, should help you out.

Answer 12

I would ask her, maybe explain what happened when she told you she liked you so she understands a little bit better.  But I would not get my hopes up too high, six years is a long time and she may have moved on, but it's worth a shot.  

Answer 13

Ask her...Follow your heart that is where true happiness lives.

Answer 14

Absolutely-people may change when they come home from college-but it is still worth a shot.  Try and become her friend and if it progresses further-great!  If not-at least you will still have her as a friend.

Answer 15

If you think she is worth it then of course ask her out.

Answer 16

1.  i would ask the girl out.  if i were you, i would rather know one way or the other if i had a shot with this girl or not, than to always wonder what might have been.

2.  are you really going to be happy being "just friends" with this girl?  doesn't seem like you will be.  be honest with yourself about that.  

3.  as for the arranged marriage, if you really arent comfortable with it, you  need to talk to your parents before it goes any further.  i'm not indian, and i can't speak to culture and tradition.  however, do you want to live the rest of your life with someone that you don't even know or love?  doesn't seem that nice to me.