Marriage and control issues?

Question

Ok, you may have read my other post. My wife wants out so she closed or joint account and put her money in a seperate account and i opened my own also. She is now still ut she said she asking me for money. She said i need to give her money for or boys scool cloths. I told her i would rather take them myself to by them school cloths but she said she already didand i should give her some money. I told her i still would like to take them myself so she got upset and said, ok than i guess we are on or own now..... I THOUGHT WE ALREADY WERE??

She is so controlling it is not funny. I did tell her that i need my balls back and that she is not going to control me anymore. I even had a nice cold beer that she was against. Its all about money. She knows that when we devorce, her 401k gets devided up 1/2 to me and she thinks not...... She makes 26hr and i make 16$hr........... we have two boys. She has controlled me so much that i can not even be a man around her but now she sees i am taken my control back and she is very upset.........

any ideas.. or suggestions ??

Answer 1

While taking back your wavoos, don't become a jerk in the process.  My ex and I were basically in the same shape you and your wife are in.  He became a wimp and let me control everything.  He wanted it that way so he would not have any responsibilities at home.  All he wanted was a secretary so he could go run the roads with his friends and family and leave me at home.

After he said he was taking back control, he turned into a self centered jerk and even our daughter will not have anything to do with him because of how he has become.

I tried to be nice and helpful with the transition and he refused to cooperate.  Just be nice and don't become a jerk.

Answer 2

Yes if you love your children do what is good for them, not you or her and if you don't do it anyway you had them take care of them properly so they won't have to do without just because you two can't get past the differences. This is going to effect them more than you or her ever. BUT tell your wife what you will and will not pay for up front and when she claims to buy them clothes you want a copy of the receipt (before she goes shopping) to help pay. A brother in law of mine he takes them and buys what they need for school clothes but sometimes a Dad doesn't get everything they actually do need for school etc..If you two can't agree then get a judge or council from someone to decide to keep the bickering at a minimum. You may think the kids are doing ok but they are not and the older one is usually the one affected the most-Good Luck

Answer 3

Someone who controls that much doesn't respect themselves.  You are right to tell her to take the kids yourself. I would keep a journal of these things in case things get really out of hand.  

This will help protect you.  

Don't let her bring you down, gain your respect back, and learn from the lessons you have received in that relationship.

Answer 4

Who is in control of your balls; her or you? Having a cold beer is your declaration of independence? That is very troubling, to say the least. You have lost control of your life and you need to regain it. Get a good competent attorney and start divorce proceedings now, you'll be much happier with that monkey off your back. You need to find someone who is a partner, not a boss in the marriage.