My boyfriend is so insecure?

Question

i'm 19 and he is 20. we have been together for just over 5 months and he seems really insecure about our relationship. He says it's because he was cheated on by his ex but he was also cheating on her?! i kissed another guy when we had a row and weren't that serious and i feel absolutely terrible about it but he doesn't know. I am worried that he will properly start seeing someone behind my back. He says he will never cheat again because there is no point and he respects me too much. I know i would never do it again as it was a drunken mistake. what do u think the chances are of him cheating again?

Answer 1

once a cheater always a cheater he has trust issues probably to with his childhood ask him where his lack of trust comes from before he was in relationships but sounds doomed from the start good luck

Answer 2

To be fair Kate, you shouldn't put so much emphasis on his unfaithfulness towards his ex, nor dwell on the possibility of it happening to you, when you admittedly kissed another guy while in this relationship .. as you said yourself, drunken mistakes can happen .. I think you answered your own insecurities. If your relationship has any chance at all, you have to give him the benefit of the doubt or at least ask yourself how would he interpret your actions.

Answer 3

pretty high!

i find that who ever is the one going on about the cheating tends to be the one that will cheat, could cheat or prob has cheat!

there consciously giving them self's the pep talk but they are trying to convince thems self's that it is you who will cheat! so they do it first so that if you do they can feel ok about it!

my sis is a cheater aholic!

she is very aware of conscious and often feels it is pointless arguing with the inevitable and just does what feels right even though she knows it wrong!

she would say hand on heart a cheater will only stop cheating when are being cheated on as that's when they are heart and do not have the energy to be with anyone else!

Answer 4

Give it some time here and see how things go.  5 months is only a short time.  Don't worry about kissing someone else - it isn't important.  Only time will tell if he is serious about your relationship.  However, if it happens again, dump this guy.

Answer 5

I don't even see how someone COULD cheat on someone they really love, I know I couldn't.

Maybe you should just reassure him a little, incase he cheats again...?

Answer 6

Look i dont wanna sound like the bad guy but you gotta learn to trust him cause at the end of the day if you dont it could be a mistake being together at all but seemin though your generally worried you obviously love him so just think about it if he was hurt by being cheated on he got a taste of his own medicine and would probably never do it again!

Answer 7

You have to look at every situation in context.  Some people cheat habitually, but often some do it depending on the situation.  But please don't ask him which one he is, because of course he's gonna say the latter.  A foundation is everything.  Don't fall deeper into the relationship utill you decide if the relationship is truly worth holdling onto for all the work you'll have to do to rebuild the trust.  With respect to whether he's cheating again, take him at his word and hire a Private Investigator if necessary.  If you really bout it, then talk to his family about him or his ex.  Pray and research...pray and research...thats the answer....lol