Question:

My grandmother died?

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like a month ago. And I'm having a very hard time. I went to the funeral and everything. But now I cant sleep and most of the time I cry myself to sleep or I take something to make me go to sleep.I feel like I'm going crazy. But my friends and family have been really good to me.

But how do you deal with death?

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  1. Believe it or not this is quite normal. You are not going to get over this in just a month or maybe 6 month. When I lost my Father it was 6 month before I could even cry. It was 2 years before I started to sleeping like I should again. If you can talk to your family and friends about it or even your minister at church, this may help. Do not keep it in side what ever you do, that will make the healing process even longer. I know talking about it is not easy but the more you do the easier it will get. Even the crying as much as you do not like it will help. I am very sorry about your loss and I hope I have been of some help to you. Good Luck and may God be with you and confort You.


  2. Different people deal with the loss of a loved one in different ways.  I lost my father suddenly and unexpectedly.  I had a very difficult time because I did not grow up with him in my life and I had just begun to get to know him.  There was o much I wanted to tell him about me and my life that I had not done yet.  The one thing I found can help is "Letters to Heaven".  Just write your Grandmother whatever you want to tell her.  Then throw the letter in a fire (if you are young, DO NOT light a fire yourself!  Have a parent do it for you!  Also make sure the ashes are entirely cold before you dispose of them.  You can always  put them down the drain)  the smoke will take the message to heaven.

    You can write to her as often or as little as you need to or want to.  Eventually you will need to do so less and less.

    Good Luck I hope this helps!

    remember she will always be with you and you will always miss her but it will hurt less eventually.

  3. Don't try and force yourself to not grieve about her. One of my sisters died nearly 4 years ago, and I still cry and miss her sometimes. The 12 months after they die is the hardest. It just takes a lot of time to come with terms with it, especially if you were close to them.

    Don't be ashamed to cry, or to grieve your grandma is whatever way helps you. There are lots of different ways to grieve too. In the first while after my sister died, I used to write letters to her, go and sit by her grave alone, and read the letters to her. I'd take flowers to her grave, and sit there telling her about stuff that I was feeling. It might not work for you, but it's an idea. I've lost a couple of relatives and friends over the last few years and dealing with each death is a different experience.

    Do as many things as you can to remember her. My whole family still celebrate my sisters birthday. We buy a present in memory of her. Sometimes we buy a plant, a bunch of purple flowers (purple was her favourite colour), a photoframe (and put a photo of her in it) or something along those lines to remember her. If we're all together, we even have a cake for her. Also at christmas and easter, and other family occasions, we always try and remember her. We have a small photo frame with a picture of her in it, that we hang on the christmas tree.

    Don't forget your grandma, because even if she isn't still here in person, she'll live on in your heart, and the hearts of other people who loved her. You're not going crazy, what you're feeling seems pretty normal to me, it's just your way of dealing with it.

    For about 12 months after my sister died, I had sleeping problems, and still do a bit. I would stay up all night, and fall asleep in the morning and sleep til midday, get up and start it all over again. I would spend endless nights on the internet, because it was the only thing that let me out of reality and into a world where nothing was real. I'm not proud of it now, but I'd spend hours chatting total strangers in chat rooms, because I could be someone else and forget the pain I was feeling. I had just started my final year of school when she died, and it stuffed my schooling up. I missed nearly 4 months of school, which made it impossible to catch up when I could finally go back.

    Maybe some counselling might be helpful to you. I know the idea of counselling isn't very appealing, but it does help. My whole family went through a couple of counselling sessions and they helped us heaps. We were all there when my sister actually died and watching your sister die isn't a very nice experience. I was 17 at the time, and my 4 other siblings were aged between 7-15. My sister was 13. She died from cancer.

    Just be patient, you'll get through it with time. Time is the only healer when it comes to dealing with death, and the amount of time varies with everyone. I hope that's helped and I'm sorry to hear about your grandma. xox

  4. my mom died a while back, but before she died for ever she died and was brought back to life, and she lived very healthy for the next 10 years.but she told me something that i will never forget, when she died the first time she saw my dad and her mom and dad. they have been dead along time, but my dad kept talking to her and smiling and waving his arms like come here, anyway she said that after that she would never be afraid to die and you know what? she never was. so i am sorry for you but do not worry i really believe there is something on the otherside. good luck to you.

  5. Everyone deals with death differently.  It is difficult at best.  You have to allow time for letting it all sink in on you and for you to adapt to the forever change in your life.  Sometimes we actually never get over it, but just learn to live with it.  Death is a part of life and the older you get the more people in your life you will lose.  It is hard, but you will find out that life does go on.  I think it is ok to cry when you feel like it.  Don't let it get to wallowing in your pain, tho.  Concentrate on the good memories and the fact that your grandmother had a good, long life.  Hang in there, time does heal all wounds.

  6. There's no other way to accept it than realizing it's just a part of life. You have to move on or else you won't be able to cope with a lot of other things in life. It's always hard losing a loved one, but I think it's best for everyone if you were strong enough to move on and get your life "back together" if you would say. It'll mean you were strong enough for your grandmother because she'd want you to be strong and move on. Good luck.

  7. You deal with your loss day by day hun, take every day as it comes. Cry when you need too, but also laugh when you need too.

    I didn't know your Grand Mother, but I'm sure she wouldn't want you to continue to be sad & upset for her passing over.

    You could buy a plant of some sort, perhaps your Grand Mother's favourite flower, plant it in your garden, in memory of her.

      I bought some rose plants to commemorate my love ones that have passed over.

      Your grief will get easier hun, you will find as time goes on that you will cry less & less. You'll never stop missing her, but you will find a way off coping with your loss.

    Good Luck . X :-)

      
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