Need a little better understanding.?

Question

Ok so here's my dilemma?

I am the mother of 2 boys ages 5 and 2 (almost 3) and I am currently 16 weeks pregnant with baby boy #3. I have been told that since my youngest is 2 that I should have what I need for the new baby. Well due to hard financial times all the baby items I had in a storage unit I ended up not being able to pay it and lost all the items I had.... I have a selected few items that I recently found found my previous babies that are in good shape, but I don't have any of the necessities to bring home baby. My question is should I have the baby shower or not. Many of my close friends think I should but there are those few nay sayers.. What are some of your thoughts and opinions on baby shower etiquette's

Additional Details

Let me just say that my finacial difficulties were that I was helping keeping my cousin and her 2 kids from be evicted. So its not like I cant afford another child as my kids have everything they both want and need. Just while I was helping my cousin things got a little hard

Answer 1

Wow, I never knew that you arent supposed to have a shower for 3rd babies.  I thought every baby got a shower.  That is pretty sad in my book.  I think that of course you can have a shower and it has nothing to do with your money problems.  Of course, you should not host it yourself, that would be odd.   You need a friend or family member to do it for you but you have loads of time to plan that

Answer 2

Hopefully the friends and family you would invite to a shower would know you have been having some hard times and sympathetic to the fact that you need some help. If you want a shower, have one, but IMO it's not exactly proper etiquette traditionally to plan and host your own shower, hopefully someone close to you would offer to do it for you.

Your due date is not coming up very soon, so you have some time to save up some money and get the few things you need - babies really don't need much when they are little, so don't be tempted to live up to the standards of the baby magazines. Stock up on cheap onsies and look for a bassinette or crib secondhand (make sure it's up to standard safety codes), and really the only thing you need other than that is a car seat.

Good luck!

Answer 3

I say yes you should, just invite those closest to you who know and understand your situation.  Your baby should not be punished for you helping out family... That's what families are for, to help out when needed, now it's their turn to help you.  I would just ignore  any negative people, you should not have to struggle with this baby b/c you were a good person.  Best of luck!!

Answer 4

Since you need the items, and you have friends that think you should have a shower, request that one of those friends hosts the shower.  I wouldn't throw your own shower in this case, especially since people might be weirded out that you're having a shower for your third baby anyway.  But, if someone else hosts it, then its a bit more politically correct, you know?  I'd also keep it small and not invite the whole world.

Answer 5

U need things, so heck yeah.

for the people saying no...they don't have to come anyway!

Answer 6

I always thought that with each new baby a baby shower comes with it. I think you should have one especially if you need things. If people dont show up then its not a big deal at least if some do you will get some of the stuff you need.

Answer 7

I think it's perfectly fine to have a baby shower.  baby shower is not asking for gifts, it's to celebrate the miracle.  

Hopefully you get some items from the shower and if not, you can always try goodwill or garage sales.  Like a co-worker who told me.  The baby only needs a crib(mattress), car seat and diapers, and formula if you are not breastfeeding.  The rest are easy.

Answer 8

We didnt really need anything when we had our baby shower.  We just told everyone to come out for a nice time, lunch and to bring diapers if they HAD to get us something :) It was mostly for everyone to see my nice and round.

I say HAVE a baby shower.  If your friends cant understand why...then they dont need to come!  I'm sure if they were pregnant they would have a shower even if they really didnt need anything.  You DO need things...so HAVE ONE!!

Answer 9

Yes,have the shower.You will get allot of useful items.And don't feel guilty about it!Nobody should feel bad about having a baby shower.Who are the nay sayers?Your a great person for helping your cousin out.Let people help you out now!!