Opinions and thoughts :)?

Question

“I killed a monster mummy!”

A little boy said

To his mother who was young

And full of dread

But the boy’s smile was contagious

And set mom full into giggles

“That’s great son,

But remember what I said.”

So the little boy shrugged

And quickly ran away

To swashbuckle the boogeyman

And hunt the man under the bed

As time grew on

So did he

And his love for monsters grew great

Till one day he realized

He’d scared all the monsters away

He slowly grew mad

Which grew to a rage

Ready to kill ANYTHING that got in his way

And in his blindness he saw

But only a void

Of cheery, happy people

While he became paranoid.

Until one day he landed

In a courtroom full of tears

But he still saw only their laugher

As he sat upon the stand

Convicted for killing

Innocent women and men

But soon he found himself guilty

For he remembered what his mommy had said

Before he killed the boogeyman

And hunted the man under the bed

“Be careful, because monsters are bad,

So instead of killing them,

Don’t become one, understand?”

Then he broke down

Shouted and ran

He hid out in his house

But not for long

For soon he had a gun to his head

Pulled the trigger and fell

Cold, lonely and dead

And when the police came round

Mom was his only visitor

As she searched his house for answers

And walked out with tears on her cheek

And a note in her hand

It said

“Mommy I killed a monster,

But it wasn’t the boogeyman,

Or the guy under the bed,

I should’ve taken your advice mommy,

Because now I’ve killed the real monster instead.”

This was written by a 10 year old. You might've seen it somewhere =D

Answer 1

Wow! This was my first time reading this poem. For a 10 year old, this is some pretty deep stuff. I had alot of comments to say, thinking that this was the works of a more older gentleman, but for a child, i would say that this was brilliant. But in more in the lines of my view of poetry, this seems more of like a short story broke up into phrases. But despite the form, this was a very good, yet creepy and sadistic, piece of poetry.