Please,please,no rude answers!?

Question

I'm not married and I don't have kids.

You are married and you have a baby.You m********e and you have a sexual thought about your child.You don't want your child sexually because that's just disgusting.It just popped in your mind.You're not going to bother your child sexually.This thought really scared you and you hated and really disliked the thought.You didn't even want to have the thought.Is this a thought that the devil brings to you?Everyone has bad thoughts but as long as we don't yeild to them then we're not bad people,right?

And is this how you know that you don't want to have s*x with your child?

You love your child just not sexually.

You don't want to hurt your child.

It's wrong.

You don't want a divorce from your husband.

You don't want to go to jail.

It's just a thought.I know you all are saying "This is sick and disgusting!".I agree but it's a thought not an action.There are some people who are strong enough to not act on the thought and stop thinking about it.Everyone who has answered this question has once in their life had bad thoughts but as long as we don't act on them,we have not sinned,right?

If you are not going to act on the thought and hated the thought then therefore,you do not want to hurt the child.Why would your spouse divorce you over just having the thought when you have no intentions to hurt the child?Isn't this something that you can work out if you love each other?I also think that I might have OCD.I have a lot of symptoms of OCD such as doing things repititively,bad thoughts and images,being afriad of being contaminated,checking things over and over again,having really bad uncontrlollable bad thoughts about anything and everything,things I wouldn't even act on.I have more symptoms.I'm not saying this is me but what if you are so tortured by the thoughts that you are about to commit suicide because you think that the child will be better off without you.You do not want to hurt the child.It was just a thought that you don't intend to have again.You're not going to act on it either so why should a husband divorce his wife over that?Would you divorce your wife because of all of this?

You're not sexually attracted to your child.It was just a thought,not an action or an intended action.Everyone has bad thoughts at least once in their life!How can this be a cause for a divorce?!?!?Is this a cause for a divorce or something?

While you were masturbating,you also thought about your son masturbating when he gets older and that turned you on.I thought any sexual image can turn a person on.You didn't want it to turn you on.It was like a fantasy!You stopped masturbating because of all of this.You didn't want the thoughts anymore so you just quit it completely.You are not tortured by the thoughts but you are tortured by the thought that you had them.You try to block them out!You have no intention to touch the child.You know that it's wrong and think that people who do it are sick.When you were really really young,you watched or ooked for children p**n but you were about 12 but you don't do it anymore because,let's face it,it's wrong and it should be illegal.Would a husband divorce his wife or get her help?Which would you do?

What if your mind is trying to trick you into thinkng that you do want to harm your child,you wouldn't do it,you love your child.Is that just your mind playing tricks on you?Will the husband still want a divorce from the wife?What would you do if you were the husband?

Now,I can't stress this enough.It was a thought not an action.We all have bad thoughts.Worse thoughts than this sometimes.So I guess if we all told our spouses about all of the thoughts that we had,we'd all be divorced.It's getting to me that no one is understanding this.I know it would be for the child's safety but if you really love someone,you're not going to leave them over a thought.Pay attention to this part:IT JUST POPPED IN MIND,YOU DIDN'T MEDITATE ON IT,THEREFORE,YOU'RE NOT INTENDING ON ACTING ON IT.YOU'RE MEDITATING ON HOW BAD THE THOUGHT WAS.YOU HATED THE THOUGHT MORE THAN ANYTHING AND YOU WISH THAT YOU WOULDN'T HAVE HAD IT.YOU THINK THAT CHILD MOLESTATION IS WRONG AND WOULDN'T WANT TO RUIN YOUR CHILD'S LIFE LIKE THAT.YOU HAVE NO INTENTIONS ON ACTIG ON THE THOUGHT,PERIOD.I CAN'T STRESS THAT ANYMORE.SO,WOULD YOU STILL DIVORCE THE WIFE?

NO RUDE ANSWERS,THIS IS A SERIOUS QUESTION.

I know that I can retain myself from the child!This is getting me so mad because NO ONE is getting this!No ONE understands me.Everyone is acting like they know but they don't!They just don't!I have OCD,I haven't been diagnosed with it but I know that I have it.I've had bad thoughts every since I was a kid!The thought tortures me everyday!Not just that,but the thought that this could be leading to divorce makes me want to kill MYSELF.I don't want you to feel sorry for me and I know that you don't.Let me make this clear,one last time!I AM NOT GOING TO HURT THE CHILD AND DO NOT INTEND

Answer 1

This is not a rude answer but is there any chance you might be bi-polar?  It has little to do with the subject you brought up, but a lot to do with the amount of writing you did to explain it.

See a doc.

I don't know if your husband would divorce you because of your thoughts.  Best to go speak with a professional, though, since your thinking is causing you distress.  If a person who needs help, seeks help, then usually those around that person are supportive.  Good luck.

Answer 2

I think your psychotic at the moment and I'm actually serious, You need to go and see a neuron psychiatrist, because the feelings you have are in the same statement as i received from my sister who was sexually abused and in the statement the abuser described it exactly as you do, I would go and get help, you don't want to be a pedophile in the making.

Answer 3

how long did it take you to type this?

Answer 4

I have thought about strangling my wife.

I have thought about stabbing my brother.

I have thought about pushing my mother down a flight of stairs.

As long as these thoughts stay in my mind and I never act on them, no one is hurt,

Admittedly, I never had the harsh sexual thoughts that you have exhibited. The larger problem is that these are not really s*x fantasies, but power fantasies.  Rape and child molestation is not about s*x, but control over a person.

Personally, any answer you get here is of little help for you. You need professional grade assistance in these matters, for what happens when that day comes that you bend into these demons?

Personally, when I do get an aberrant thought, I work it to death and then discard it. I relate everything to my personal ethics. If is does not fit, it gets discarded and it never comes up again.

Answer 5

I agree strongly with the third answer. She is right it sounds like you are Bi-polar. Maybe with a mild case of OCD. I wouldnt divorce you if I knew you were actively getting help for your issues. Your sexual fantasies are just that fantasies. It doesnt make you a horrendous person. Obviously, you are really hurt by feeling this way if you need to talk to a professional. Be warned people are really sensitive to issues related to children. That is probably why people give you rude answers.  

Answer 6

The human mind has a tendancy to stray in directions your conscious does not want it to. It's a natural thing that happens to just about everyone. If a man who is married looks at another woman and thinks sexual thoughts does that make him a bad person? Absolutely not. And if you have children, you could just be thinking about your child being sexually active, which could lead you to think thoughts like that. Thoughts are like the wind, you cannot catch the unfavorable ones and dispose of them as you wish. Don't feel like a bad person. Sometimes humans display a strange interest in seemingly morbid, inappropriate things. I am completely normal, but have a strange fascination with watching videos of death. Not because I am a murderer or a psycho, but because I am a human being and we have a natural curiosity and attraction for things that are socially unaccepted. Do you think a nun never thinks about having s*x?? Of course they do!! But it's the fact that they do not act upon these thoughts that makes them JUST THOUGHTS. Hope I could make you feel better.

Answer 7

Everyone has automatic thoughts they'd rather not have.

"Every man has some reminiscences which he would not tell to everyone, but only to his friends. He has others which he would not reveal even to his friends, but only to himself, and that in secret. But finally there are still others which a man is even afraid to tell himself, and every decent man has a considerable number of such things stored away. That is, one can even say that the more decent he is, the greater the number of such things in his mind."

- Fyodor Dostoevsky, Notes from the Underground

Answer 8

ok, that was long ...  I only made it half-way through ...  my only thought is this:  if it disgusted you so bad, do you think the only reason you had this thought is b/c you have heard of other people doing it?  maybe you were in a bad mood or a little depressed or sleep deprived ...   if it repulses you that it happened, then i think it is b/c you have just heard too much bad stuff and the back of your mind is going "how can people do this" and you just happened to be tired or in a bad enough mood to have this come out at the same time you were "relieving" yourself ...  just timing and a thought of "how could someone do THAT?!?!"