Question on Homeschooling?

Question

How do parents incorporate social skills into their children's daily program? I've known a few parents that homes school their children, but I have never asked them this question. Thanks for taking the time to answer! :)

Answer 1

Well group classes and co ops. Youth f=groups and community stuff! Hope this helps!

Answer 2

Having kids with autism, I always snicker when people ask about social skills. Social skills are those which help people socialize, and those are learned every day, beginning at a young age with their parents. As children get older, they play with neighbor kids, kids at church, siblings and cousins.

When they get to school age, most are shipped off to schools every day where the ideal socialization is sitting quietly in class, speaking when spoken to, not arguing with the teacher, etc. Those are beneficial in school, but quite frankly are not helpful when building a career or a family. Kids who are homeschooled, learn all of those things and more when they are working with their parents, when they are accessing community and recreational classes, in church and at the store, so many places. They learn moderation. They learn to question what they are told, because they aren't breaking class discipline when they speak up and ask why.

Personally we have a close-knit unschool group that we see several times a week, a general homeschool group that we see several times a month, church friends that spend the night ALL the time, and classes and library and shopping, just people that we meet daily. We have neighbors that we see throughout the day and in the afternoons when school is out.

Hope this helps. I think your question was presented respectfully with apparent curiousity. People get touchy because so many people come on and assume that homeschoolers never leave the house, that they don't know anyone outside the family, etc. So we do tend to get defensive when people flame the boards looking for a reaction.

Answer 3

When kids are little, they're taken out for playdates. They are likely involved in religious groups. Many are Scouts or 4Hers. They probably take sports or martial arts classes. Also, they just go outside and play and in the process, they form relationships with kids in the neighborhood.

When the kids get to be teenagers, they have the same social instincts any other teenagers do. At this point, we don't need our parents to set things up for us. We're in sports leagues, rock bands, orchestras, Scouts, 4H, co-op classes (very few people go through the teen years without outside resources) and just hanging out.

If you had kids and you absolutely had to homeschool them, (let's say the schools were closed for ten years because of a flesh-eating fungus that nobody could remove) would you keep them inside all day? Wouldn't you do everything in your power to make sure your kid had friends? Why are homeschoolers any different?

Also, I've never heard of a homeschooler who didn't have friends in school. We're not wandering around with cloves of garlic to ward of school kids.

Answer 4

The "S" Question Again. Did the family you know spend all their time at home or did they always seem busy?

We are members of a home school group who has so many things planned we have to pick and choose what we will do with the HEA. They also offer Co-Op.

Besides School type activities their is Girl/ Boy Scouts, Dance (of all kinds), Karate, local team Sports, parks to meet other kids at, neighborhood kids to play with, Gymnastics, Boys and Girls Clubs, Volunteering at the hospital (animal shelter, homeless shelter, where ever), Get togethers for a Charity. Our kids live very active lives.

Answer 5

We start them early with phrases such as:

May I please...

Thank you....

May I help you....

Excuse me....

Bless you....

We teach them to sit quietly and listen when it is appropriate adn we teach them to speak up and be heard when they have something to say.  It really isn't any different for them than for other children.

They use these words on a daily basis within the family and while in public.   They speak in a polite manner to their grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, neighbors, friends, acquaintences, etc...  There is no limit on how many people they can talk to.

My children started out learning how to buy and sell by spending their own money in the store and by managing garage sales, lemonade stands, craft booths, etc.

They learn how to play on a team by joining a sports program.  We've done baseball, volleyball, basketball, football, wrestling, horses, etc.  

We don't really have to teach them very much beyond the basic rules of interaction --- they learn these early --- things like "don't hit", "don't bite", etc... but hopefully all kids learn this stuff prior to going to group functions of any kind whether it be church, school, gym days, etc.

Just because we apply our study skills at home doesn't mean that we don't enjoy being around other people.

My high-school age son is working in a Country Store for a local farm -- they hold a Tulip Festival every year and hire kids from the area to run the till, do the set up and clean up, drive the cow-train, etc. etc.  My son is one of the best at public relations and the owners like it when he is there to sell things for them.  He is very good with his math skills and he is very honest.  This is his third year working for them.  It will last for 2 months.  He will go back to work for a landscaper in the summer or begin a new job.  This son of mine has been home-schooled for his entire life --- and incorporates social skills into his own day -- every day.

Answer 6

Defensive answers?  Wow, you must have read something that I didn't.

Anyway, we incorporate social skills in our daily programs by being social people and learning good manners.

It is pretty much the same way that all people incorporate social skills.   Homeschool people are just people and as varied as the people you meet on the street, in the store, or wherever.

Answer 7

I am a homeschool mom who majored in Secondary Education, but instead of teaching in a public institution, I chose to homeschool. I think that the general public is very uninformed about homeschooling today, and still relies on the old stereotype of the "shy unsocialized hermetic homeschooler" who never leaves their home and has no friends. It is so inaccurate. My kids are very social and anything but shy! We live in a suburb of Kansas City, and there are hundreds, maybe thousands of other Hschoolers in our small area. Nationwide, there are millions of us. We are active members of several local groups for homeschool famlies, and we take part in at least one social activity every day, outside of our home. Activities are set up and organized by moms through yahoo email loops. Our local homeschool groups offers the following activities to name a small few; Girl and Boy Scout troops, 4H, campfire, bowling, gymnastics, swimming, horseback riding, art, choir, and gym classes, holiday parties, book clubs, a 2 hour long recess time every week, plus park days, field trips, picnics and academic fairs. These are just a few of the many things we do while everyone else is in school). When we are not doing our lessons, we are always on the go, and it is ironic that we call ourselves homeschoolers since we spend so much time away from home! Homeschoolers have the advantage of one on one personalized attention educationally, and we also dont have to waste a lot of time on discipline, paperwork, and busywork. We can get our lessons done in a couple hours each morning, and then get on with enjoying our hobbies and friends. We also have the advantage of making closer more meaningful friendships because our kids have the time for more playdates and outings, instead of sitting, bored and institutionalized behind a desk all day. I find it ridiculous that public schools are thought of as a great place to socialize! How can kids socialize when they have to sit silently and listen for 8 hours a day?? Homeschoolers have the time to learn at their own pace, to spend time with friends, and just be kids, without the pressures and negative influences of public school. Homeschool kids are not hermits and they are not freaky nerds. They are just really lucky kids who get to enjoy life and learning every day. No child is left behind in a homeschool, and socialization is the best reason to homeschool. Public school creates a harsh artificial society where children are raised by their peers. Homeschoolers live and learn in the real world. For more info, read the book; "The Well adjusted Child; The Social Benefits of Homeschooling", by Rachel Gathercole,

or Dumbing Us Down; The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling, by John Taylor Gatto

Answer 8

Social skills are picked up from parents as we go about our daily lives. This happens at a very young age. The best way to teach manners is to demonstrate them. From there it is a matter of getting out and being social. We have friends. My child takes outside classes, plays in the 'hood with the other children and meets people at the movies, park and other outings. It is a natural process. I encourage and make sure she has plenty of free time. Other than that, I meddle very little.

Answer 9

First off...to Galen B.  California is not trying to break the back of homeschooling.  One appellate court made one ruling, which Superintendent of Public Instruction is not going to enforce, as per his announcement.  The are several law firms handling this case and it will either be depublished or overturned...or simply ignored by the vast majority of families.

Now, on to the socializing question or the "S" question as we know it.  Let me give you our child's "S" schedule.  In brief.

Monday - park day with dozens of kids...about three hours.

Tae Kwan Do for an hour.  (Today we are visiting a friend's class at another school.)

Tues -Sewing class (with adults), science class, volunteering at Tae Kwan Do school.

Wed - Park day with a different set of kids.  Tae Kwan Do class.

Thursday - Another science class (different group of kids), volunteering, Tae Kwan Do.

Fri - Tae Kwan Do, playing with friends.

Saturday - Tae Kwan Do - playing with friends.

Sunday - Playing with friends.

In April we will be adding an art class to the schedule.

Hope that helps.

Answer 10

We live. :) Seriously. When we're together, they learn appropriate social skills with the various issues that come up. They can be guided when they are with friends, they can be given social guidelines when they enter into a new social activity. It's nothing that I specifically think of most of the time--it's just part of daily life. When an issue arises, it gets addressed, or if I can foresee potential issues in a situation, I'll "prep" them ahead of time.

I will say, though, that I consider social skills guidance more about parenting than about homeschooling. I enjoy reading books that help *me* improve in this area, things like "Raising a Thinking Child" or "Moral Intelligence". As homeschooling parents, we're just with them more so have a greater opportunity (although not all take up on that opportunity) to guide our children more.

Answer 11

Hi,

Parents discipline their lives, habits, daily routine, eating habits, general behaviour, treatment given to guests and unwanted guests, neighbours and friends, honesty in their dealings and acts and there are many more activities on which the parents exercise control in front of adolescent children in a natural way and from time to time ask the children to do so. This systems develops social skills in the children and they follow their parents actions. It is difficult but it can be done.

You can also try. Best of luck.

Bye.

Answer 12

My nephew is home schooled in California. He has various activities with other home schooled kids. I see California is trying to break the back of the home schools.

Answer 13

There are church activities,play dates.

This is my first year homeschooling and he started playing soccer.

Also,there are family gatherings.

He loves being homeschooled.

He can use his own bathroom and do his work in about 3 hours,that is is if stays with it. But he can take breaks in between.

When he's done..He has the rest of the day to play or help me.

Also you can teach them according to the word of God,which we as parents are instructed to do.

Answer 14

I know that it seems like home schooled students don't get very much social experience, but they do!!!!! I homeschool and have to turn away social opportunities. I take Taekwondo, am in a homeschooling network, have about fifty friends, go to UNLV everyday, and my mom is starting her own homeschool network with some of my friends!

Answer 15

Are you asking about social skills, or socialization?  They are two differen things.  How do public schools teach social skills?

Here are some articles for you to read:

A good essay on the Socialization Myth

http://www.lewrockwell.com/orig/zysk1.ht...

No Thank You, We Don't Believe in Socialization!

http://www.webeans.net/hutt/socialize.ht...

Paula's Archives - Socialization

http://www.redshift.com/~bonajo/socializ...

Research Shows Great Things

http://www.thehomeschoolmagazine.com/How...  

Personally, my son is involved with HS bowling, HS ice skating, community track (outdoor & indoor), community cross country, Cub Scouting (w/ PS kids), church activities, bible club (not at the same church), HS co-op (w/ 128 other HS'ed kids), museum classes, volunteer work, and more.

As for "social skills" we teach them the same way we would if he was in PS - we model good/proper/respectul behavior and we hold our DS to a standard.  It's much better than the negative training he is exposed to from PS'ed kids.