Relationship ?

Question

Are you close to your father n mother ?

Even after become a father myself, i still find it hard to communicate with my father. I just don't know why, it has been like that since i am young. We seldom talk, may be not more than 5 minutes per year ! Worst still we are not staying together since my teenage year [ study then working outstation ]

Its the opposite with my mom, we can just chat for hours each time we see each other.

Really wanted to have a nice conversation with my dad before its too late, who know, life is too short ! But how ???

Answer 1

I have a similiar father he shoes no emotions towards me, sometimes i feel he hates me, but clearly his father was the same with him I'm 23yrs old and i gave up because of the mental stress it cause,  i just don't talk to him so he could see i could be as cold as him, i know is the wrong thing to do but my heart deserves a BREAK!  Best wishes!

Answer 2

Why don't you go fishing or bring him out for a drink ? Just the two of you... Or you could ask him for advice... to start a conversation...

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Edit:

If you wanna break the ice... I suggest not bringing your bros. It'd be pointless. You should go with him alone. It's gonna get uncomfortable only for awhile. Even if it's for the entire "session" drinking tea with him, it's ok... at least he'd know then you really want him to know you appreciate him. He'll know you are trying. Like I said... ask him for advice... any advice. It should break the ice. Meet him with a few questions in your head which could help you with your life now. Good luck...

Answer 3

u must think if u in his shoes..

how u want close with ur son?

mb u could be give him a present as a starting point to tackle him..

try to be talkative...mb discuss about men talk

Answer 4

How ?  You have to visit often, with your children(his grandchildren). Start with Hi ! Dad !....involve your children-his grandchildren...get through him via his grandchildren.  Talk about your children with him about his grandchildren.... Got it ?

Answer 5

You've just stated the most obvious way. Open up to him that its hard to talk to him. Its a great way to start the conversation and hopefully build the relationship.

Answer 6

i REALLY close to my dad..... i love him soooooooooooooooo much ... but i don like my mom i never talk to her anymore....

Answer 7

i agree wit Me.. life is too short.. better not to regret later...

Answer 8

Take him down the pub mate.. I guarantee after a few hours of drinking together you will become closer (even if it's only for that one night)

Answer 9

Not close with my Dad, but closer to my Mom.

Dad is better with his friends than with his own family. Would do anything for friends but would rant and rave if we ask for the same favours.

When I was younger, I didn't see a lot of him as he was always out till the wee hours of the morning. Sometimes we went for weeks without bumping into one another even though we lived in the same house!

My parents live with me now. And though our relationship has improved (now that he's older and doesn't go out as much), we still can't find much to talk about. Whereas Mom can spend hours just complaining about Dad to me! *sigh*

Answer 10

m very close with my parents..

and i respect ur thought to have a nice conversation wif ur dad..u r such a good son even u are not close, at least u have the effort and the thought..great one  =)

cook for him. let him critics u watsoever..

ask his opinion on this n that..

ask him bout ur son..etc..

Answer 11

Old folks ever told me that a boy normally is close to his mother while a girl is normally close to her father; and I am one of them.

I have countless things to tell and share with my dad but when it comes to my mother, I simply don't know what to say to her. Recently I tried making the first move towards my mother, like asking her how to prepare a certain dish which she is good at. Or pull a button from a blouse then ask her how to sew it back. It has in a way given us a chance to talk, and of course she will nag, nag, nag and nag that I does not know how to do it.

For your case, you might want to be more alert whenever you are with him and check out what are his main interest. If he is into horse racing (just an example), just pretend to approach him each time you see him holding the book. Ask a few stupid questions to make him feels that you are stupid. The conversation will go on. The golden rule (1) ... let him be always right even though you know he is wrong. The golden rule (2), don't talk about the up bringing of your child, his grand child cos each upbringing is different.

Hope it helps....

@_@

Answer 12

get something to talk abt.. know what ur dad likes..u start a conversation u can start by taking a family vacation just u ur mom and dad.. and do everything together.. dinner, walk on the  beach or site seeing.. tell him stories abt the place u visit ( read from the brochure/ know abt the city u r visiting before he does and be a tour guide).. maybe take some fishing rods.. one for each one of u...fishing and have fun.. i know everytime any one of u get a fish..there definately be a laughter...take him for the food he likes...buy for him something he wanted for long..talk to him abt the thing that u ought and why u bought it...

after that when u have got comfortable with each other.. tell him u missed all this when u were young... and u had great fun with him and would love to have more...say that u love him.. i say that to my mom and dad always.. they too let me know now and then that they got my back and love me forever...i have great relationship with my parents even now after i am married and have kids on my own..

just becoz u are a man dont think hiding ur feelings is good and manly... let it out then ur family would know u better...especially ur dad...

i wish u all the luck to have a great relationship with ur dad... as u said yes life is very short...