Sentence Proof ????? Help Please?

Question

I think there is something wrong with this sentence going in my argument paper i just cant put my finger on it can u guys tell me whats wrong

First off the drug is not healthy to smoke and can cause, as much damage as a cigarette.

Answer 1

you have a , after cause (comma)

Answer 2

Drop the comma.

Answer 3

I think what's wrong is the use of the word ‘off.’ In this sentence it is superfluous, i.e., it is unnecessary and does nothing to add to the meaning of the sentence.  The comma after 'cause' is also unneccesary.

Try this:

First, the drug is extremely unhealthy to smoke and can cause as much harm (or damage) as a cigarette.

Answer 4

first of all, drugs are not healthy and may cause more damage than cigarettes

Answer 5

i think its fine

Answer 6

Hmmm... if you are not going to change any words, I would go:

First off, the drug is not healthy to smoke and can cause as much damage as a cigarette.