Should I confront my ex......?

Question

Ok i've had enough...this is not only one friend telling me, but several ppl telling me that my ex has been giving them looks or negative comments that they're talking to me too and or are my friends too. Few of them don't hang out with me after they started to hang with my ex, but many of our old friends and many other friends still friends with me cuz they know who my ex is. which is good. BUT should I confront my ex to stop shitting to other ppl about me? We've been over 3 yrs ago and he is the one walked out of our relationship, so what's his beef? Do I confront him? or continue to ignore it?

Answer 1

Ignore it. He can say anything he wants, there's nothing you can do, you can't put a gag order on him. If you confront him, it will only give him the satisfaction of knowing he's getting a rise out of you. Find something else to talk about and ask your friends to not mention your ex to you.

Answer 2

Your too mature for these games. Your ex husband obviously has a small weiner.

Answer 3

Ignore him... if your mutual friends don't want to han out with you anymore than they were not really your friends.  

Answer 4

You say it has been over 3 years but it is not over until you stop asking this. If he talks smack about you, SO WHAT? If people take his side & stop talking to you, SO WHAT?

Do you know how many people would kill for a magic button to screen all their friends to see which ones are true? You have this with him so be happy. The only reason "several people" have been telling you things is cuz they want to get a rise outta you. Misery loves compay, so you can play their game or not, the choice is yours. You act like confronting him or ignoring it are your only 2 options. There is a 3rd & it is not to play.

Answer 5

Deffinatley confront him. He has absolutly no right to talk to your friends that way. You should not ignore it at all. Talk to him and tell him that your friends are your friends and if he doesnt want to be nice to them than he shouldnt talk or hang out with them ever/again. Tell him how it is.

Answer 6

i'd pursue it

Answer 7

ignore him... if he knows its getting to you he'll keep doing it.  Or simply tell he to GROW UP!!

Answer 8

why give him the satisfaction that it's getting to you.  leave him and his childish ways behind.  

Answer 9

Why don't you tell your friends to do their own confronting?

Answer 10

Steer clear. You do not have to answer for his bad behaviour, you are not with him.

I had ppl complain to me about my ex... he had debts, beefs, whatever with them. Uh, OK... do i have to pay them off or apologise for him any more? NO! And the funny thing was he always bragged how I would be nowhere without him, yet it was all his relationships, credit, etc that went south while I was fine ever after. Dont continue to answer for him, he is not your concern.

Answer 11

Just don't show him or any of his 'friends' that it's bothering you.

Answer 12

Tuco believes the best thing you can do is ignore it.  Allowing him to know it bothers you will only bring him satisfaction.

I am sure the people in the middle really don't want to be there and can see through the BS.  The friends that can't and want to listen to him are really not friends.

Adios.

Answer 13

Let it be...........confronting him means you are bringing yourself down to his level!

Answer 14

Ignore it.  I found that divorce helped me to realize who my true friends were.  The ones who really know you and care will not put stock in what he says.  The ones who don't will either believe him or make a big deal of it.